“Zoe Tyler told me to clench my buttocks.”
That was the vocal coach’s advice to Graham Norton on discovering he is to take over the role of Albin in La Cage Aux Folles — not, I hasten to add, in order to squeeze into the slinky dresses he will don as Albin’s alter-ego Zaza, but to improve his singing voice. Well, it might help with hitting those high notes, at least…
After Gareth Gates’ troubles with the Technicolour Dreamcoat yesterday as he was revealed as the next Joseph, you’ll forgive me for feeling a little trepidation as Graham Norton tottered down the stairs on the Playhouse Theatre stage, in full drag, to greet the gathered press and photgraphers. But, ever the professional, Graham gracefully descended, and even managed to out-pout and out-pose the Cagelles who presented him.
In stilettos, make-up and a red sparkly dress with a split up to the thigh, it has to be said that Graham looked rather in his element, though some of his more ridiculous posing did prompt that trademark chuckle to emerge on more than one occasion.
For all Graham’s great appearance though — and there were mutterings around me that his legs looked “sickeningly” good — that was nothing compared to the moment at which he actually got to open his mouth. Not, alas, to sing (he said that his singing voice is “officially embargoed”, although that could have been an excuse…) but in an on-stage interview, and Q&A with the press.
If there’s one thing Graham Norton can do, of course, it’s talk, and he was on fantastic form as he discussed his expectations — and, it seems, quite genuine nerves — regarding taking on such a well-loved and iconic role. His main aim, he said, was simply not to “destroy it” since the show has been doing so well, and said that his biggest fear was coming across as some “Godzilla in heels.”
A quick discussion of the part’s logistics out of the way (“You need to shave armpits, chest and in my case, unfortunately, back, but not your legs”) he went on to say that this is not a career move for him, but a definite one-off. “The theatre-going public can rest assured that I have no ambitions in musical theatre apart from this” he said.
Why, then, this show in particular? It turns out that he saw it in San Francisco nearly 25 years ago, and decided there and then that Albin was the role — the only role — for him. He thinks it’s an “infectious show” which you’d have to be pretty miserable not to enjoy, and said despite I Am What I Am’s position as a karaoke classic, it still “packs an emotional punch” in the context of the show.
In the full knowledge that his performance will come under intense scrutiny (“I’m seeing myself as a late Christmas present for theatre critics”) Graham will be altering his lifestyle a little for the role: “I will be drinking less,” he said, “a vat of wine is very bad for your vocal cords, apparently…”
Finally, Graham left us with one final verbal gem that will stay with me for some time, such was its profundity and visceral power: “I imagine that, on opening night, there will be a little bit of poo trickling down my thick Wo-Man tights.” Nice.
Photo: Dan Wooller
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