Well folks, summer is well and truly underway. No I don’t care what the weatherman says, you can tell just by looking at the TV schedules. There’s nothing on except filler TV and by god, is it filling column inches. So I’ve taken a “If you can’t beat ‘em” approach… what? I write about telly - it’s my job - I still have principles.
Now I’m sure you’ve all been glued to your screens for Soccer Aid, but I hear things are already gearing up for the next big “event” programme the network has up its sleeve.
I am, of course, talking about The X Factor: Battle of the Stars, which hits screens on Monday with a host of “celebrity” contestants including motormouth Chris Moyles, Nikki “I used to be soap star but now I just sit in my underwear” Sanderson, and Paul Daniels and Debbie McGee. Rather unsurprisingly the original rent-a celebs, reality tart Rebecca Loos and serial love twat James Hewitt are also putting an appearance. Now don’t tell anyone I told you, but word is the production team have rather unkindly taken to calling them Posh and Becks.
Seriously, isn’t their 15 minutes up yet?
Oh one more thing… more than 60 million votes were cast in the final of American Idol, apparently more people voted than for US president. Simon Cowell calls that fact astonishing; I have some rather more unkind words in mind. Nonetheless a 30 second advert broadcast in the final reportedly cost more than $1 million, which shows rather comprehensively that reality - whether we like it or not - is far from dead.
Stupidly, I'd been looking forward to this, as I've always enjoyed Celebrity Fame Academy. I wasn't two things into consideration - 1) It's not for Comic Relief, 2) It's on ITV. I should hav realised the casting was going to be rubbish.