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May 2007 Archives

We're a Big Brother free blog. Vote for Nicky.

Nicky Maxwell, Big Brother contestant

In his latest post, Mark explains why he’s going Big Brother free again this year.

Which is a laudable aim. And, going by reactions to the first night’s viewing, one that many others may be sharing (although people do say that every year, don’t they?). In fact, I was all prepared to declare TV Today a 100% Big Brother Free blog

And then the fates conspired against me. For it turns out that one of the initial 11 contestants has not one, but two direct links in to this very office. It turns out that Watford-based Nicky Maxwell is not only the cousin of one of The Stage’s subeditors, but also was in the same year at school as one of our reporters.

As a result, I feel I have no choice but to name Nicky as the official TV Today-endorsed contestant.

We just won’t be writing about her…

TV Today. As free of Big Brother as Mars bars are of animal products.

I'm not coming to get you

It’s that time of year when, I make wildly ambitious statements about my intent over the next few months.

Long-time readers of TV Today might remember my very first post to this blog, in which I said:

“I have willingly become a social pariah at the water cooler by a conscious decision to go Big Brother free this year”

and once again, thus creating a TV Today tradition, I’m doing the same this year.

Well, that’s the theory. Other readers with a long memory may also recall me posting this less than a month later, reporting my complete failure at the task in hand.

But not so this year! This year I will be strong! This year I will be forthright! And after the mis-managed disaster area that was Celebrity Big Brother and Channel 4’s belligerent refusal to take any kind of responsibility, I don’t think I’ll have a problem.

The main obstacle for Big Brother is the fact that it has, almost overnight, stopped being cool. It’s an embarrassment to watch, and despite a strong audience for the opening night, I predict that ratings for this year’s tedious battle to become famous for doing nothing to earn it will slide off as we go along. I can but hope, anyway…

And even before the first week is out, the producers have made a huge error of creative judgment in choosing to populate the house exclusively with women. Now, before anybody pounces and accuses me of being sexist, this decision doesn’t bother me in the slightest. Remember, I’m not watching. I’m merely reporting the reaction of my beloved who flicked on for two minutes before grimacing and switching over for some Adrian Chiles action on BBC2.

“What’s wrong?” I called from the kitchen where I was attempting to slide cocktail sticks under my fingernails as a suitable alternative to BB.

“A bunch of shrieking women in a room is not what I’d call entertainment,” she sighed.

And there we have the problem in a nutshell with no need to elaborate. If you want to preserve your ratings, Channel 4, get some blokes in there quick sharp, or disaster will be just around the corner…

Which might not be a bad thing on reflection.

Teletubbies? Ne!

It seems apt that on the tenth anniversary of one of the BBC’s most successful children’s programmes, Teletubbies should be at the centre of a controversy… in Poland.

Poor Tinky Winky… Ewa Sowinska, a Polish spokesperson for children’s rights has tasked psychologists to evaluate the content of the still hugely popular Beeb show to assess whether or not it encourages a homosexual lifestyle.

Um… what?

Sowinska has been quoted in the press, specifically on the subject of Tinky Winky, saying:

“I noticed he was carrying a woman’s handbag. At first, I didn’t realise he was a boy.”

Yes. You heard right. Confusion is reigning over the sexualty of a seven-foot-tall, fat purple alien creature with a triangle on his head and a TV screen on his sizeable paunch, all because he carries a handbag. Personally, I just thought he was stylishly accessorised with a particularly jaunty man bag.

I can’t help wondering what the psychologists carrying out the task make of their current project. I take it they’ll be talking to Polish children on the subject, and one can only hope they’ll be rewarded with bewildered stares from the little ones. Either that or they’ll have Tinky Winky himself on the couch to get to the deep-seeded route of all his problems.

We really do live in a world gone mad, don’t we? And if Sowinska’s people do find that (by whatever nebulous means) Teletubbies promotes a homosexual lifestyle, she can recommend that the show be taken of the air. Sigh.

I think the point is being missed somewhat. The Polish psychologists should be looking into other psychological aspects of the Teletubbues. For example, have children who watched the programme grown up to develop unhealthy addictions to custard and toast with smiley faces burnt into them?

Research like this is essential I feel, to combat dangerous tendencies in our children. I want answers as to why, after watching The Magic Roundabout and The Wombles as a kid, I have a secret sugar mine hidden beneath my house and wake up with dangerous compulsions to collect litter on Wimbledon Common.

UPDATE: As I was writing this piece, news has broken that the story may have been a storm in a bowl of tubby custard. Ewa Sowinska’s office are not now launching an investigation into the Teletubbies, saying they are:

“fictional characters; they have nothing to do with reality.”

Well I’m glad we got that cleared up…

Don't Like the Away Game...

Mmm, so EastEnders think that the results of Saturday night’s British Soap Awards 2007 were fixed, do they? A BBC insider allegedly complained to the Daily Star:

“The panel isn’t fair. It’s made up of executives from ITV as well as critics and representatives from each soap. But there isn’t much impartiality and a lot of the voting is tactical. It’s a bit of a fix.”

According to my sources, the panel is actually made up of a representative from each soap, alongside five journalists and that there is no weighting in favour of ITV on the voting panel. So is this just a bit of saber rattling from Auntie in the face of an embarrassing defeat for the flagship soap, or a genuine case of sour grapes?

Probably both, but it’s worth noting that EastEnders managed no wins in any of the categories voted for by viewers. Traditionally EastEnders has done well here, probably down to the highly dedicated fanbase. But what has happened this year? It seems that even the die-hard fans can’t be relied on to come through for ‘Enders now and are starting to turn their backs on the soap.

But it does seem that there’s some foot stamping going on here because things haven’t gone EastEnders’ way. Oh boo hoo! You weren’t complaining last year were you? No, of course not, because ‘Enders won Best Soap, Best Actor, Best Actress, Best Single Episode, Sexiest Female and Villain of the Year. No accusations of bias coming from the Walford camp in 2006.

Instead of griping about not winning a few gongs to stick in the bathroom back at Elstree, it might be best for the ‘Enders team to go and have a good long look at why they might have been passed over for all but one award.

I’d start with the [psychic twins[(http://www.thestage.co.uk/tvtoday/2007/05/thetomorrowpeople.php)…

Doctor Who 3.8: Human Nature

There’s a general view (sometimes held by us here at TV Today) that television isn’t what it used to be. We are bombarded by cheap reality shows, twee Sunday night dramas, cookery, property, wife swaps and diminished opportunities for children’s drama. Yep, sometimes watching television can be a real chore.

And then along comes something that restores your faith, that brings home all the things that are great about this most frustrating of mediums and reminds us of how lucky and privileged we are to have huge talent in front of and behind the cameras making television. That happened on Saturday night watching Human Nature, the first of a two-part Doctor Who story. Not only is Human Nature the best piece of Doctor Who I’ve ever seen (and I’ve been there through thick and thin), it ranks up there with the best television drama I’ve ever seen.

Long story short - some bad guys are after the Doctor’s Time Lord DNA, so he decides to lie low for a bit and willingly give up his memories, identity and race to become human. And so we meet John Smith, an unassuming teacher at a boarding school in 1913, and his maid, Martha Jones. Martha’s looking after everything, making sure that Smith keeps his head down until the heat from the alien bad guys goes away. The Doctor has left her a list of things that cover all eventualities and a pocket watch. If anything goes wrong, Martha must open the watch.

There are just three small problems: the Doctor didn’t say what to do in case his human alter ego falls in love, the creepy Family of Blood turn up to literally sniff the Doctor out and the watch goes missing…

Any Dream Will Do: Week 9

Down to five contestants now, after what host Graham Norton describes the departure of “the mighty Daniel” as a decision that “shocked the nation”. And judging from the reaction to last week’s recap and Friday’s interview with Daniel, he’s not wrong…

Everything kicks off with a group number that’s notable for two things: firstly, Lee’s voice is far stronger that of the others (unless they’ve all started singing Could be famous, Could be a big shucchessh). Also, at one point Lewis and Lee get their positions mixed up. While it’s pretty obvious that something went werong, to both guys’ credit they both do their best to recover as quickly as possible.

Before we get on to the solo performances, we have another explanation from Andrew why he chose to save Lewis over Daniel last week. I don’t necessarily buy his explanations, but his daughter certainly has taste.

This week, the five solo songs are to cover the five key themes of Joseph’s emotional journey: arrogance, betrayal, vulnerability, courage and being a dreamer. First up, Lee handles dreaming with the Monkees’ Daydream Believer. It’s another of the series’ obsession with pop songs that offer very little in the way of light and shade to play with, and Lee ends up with a performance which is unabashed cheese. It’s still very professionally handled, though, and at least he shows that he’s capable of handling lighter material. Zoe says she’s been working with Lee on not setting his jaw too tight — I wonder if this is related to his issue with sibilance? His performance was relaxed and comfortable, she says. John uses a lemonade simile to describe what he says was a brilliant, professional, polished performance. Andrew says it was a perfect ‘early Joseph’ performance.

Second, Ben has to show vulnerability. And is promptly given what must count as the most difficult song of the whole series, with the Roy Orbison classic Crying. And with most of the song, he is able to bring the pop number into a musical theatre space. Where he falls down is with the falsetto — which, to be honest, any of the other four would have had trouble with. It’s a creditable performance, even with the vocal faults. Bill says that even though he blew a few notes, he kept on the journey that the song goes on. Zoe says that it shows Ben has worked on his pitch, but his vibrato needs work (“you could drive a bus through it”). John points out that Joseph never has to sing that high. Which does make one wonder — just why have so many songs the Josephs have been given this series included falsetto passages? Andrew says he still has a long way to go in this competition. Well, not too long, seeing as the final is just two weeks away…

This week, Craig is asked to portray betrayal with Suspicious Minds. Andrew warns that he can’t smile his way through this one, and to begin with it’s a warning Craig takes to heart. A strong vocal is almost enough to let me forgive his usual shtick of holding his outstretched hand palm down, which he does in very single performance and is one of those things that is really irrationally bugging me. Unfortunately, once he passes the bridge of the song he reverts his classic cabaret singer persona — all smiles and flirtations with the audience. Which, I have to say, he is very good at — but is maybe not ideal for a West End performer. Bill thinks he found the perfect line between drama and selling the song — and he loved the twinkle that Craig gets once he’s working the room. Denise thinks he gave a fantastic performance, while Andrew asks himself whether he forgives Craig his smiles. On balance, he says, he does…

Lewis has to show courage this week, and not just with the performance of Enrique Iglesias’ Hero. And in contrast to the last couple of weeks, he gives a controlled, theatrical delivery. It just shows that, given the right material, he can portray a maturity far beyond his years. Indeed, he makes it easy to forget that he’s only 17 years old — clearly capable of portraying the older Joseph, should he get the job. Both Zoe and John admit that they thought Lewis should have gone instead of Daniel last week, but on the strength of tonight’s performance he sang well. However, John says he thinks Lewis is more of a singer than a West End performer, which Denise quite rightly pulls him up on. To be honest, I’m surprised that they say that about Lewis and not about Craig, who clearly struggles with his acting when Lewis has no problems in that area. Bill says he sees and hears a Joseph, while Andrew says he saw charm, but no inner strength.

Finally for the solo slots, Keith has to portray arrogance with Robbie Williams’ Let Me Entertain You. And if he was on radio, he might — he has a great voice and, as ever, delivers the song with conviction. But his stage presence is patchy. I know these guys don’t have too much time to develop a full routine, but of the stage performances today this was, with Craig’s, the weakest of the night. John was entertained, but noted his occasional drop of focus. He does point out, though, that Joseph rarely needs to deliver a full high-octane performance. Denise says Keith reminds her of a young John Barrowman (maybe it’s just the cockiness and big teeth). For Zoe, he is a star vocally. Bill doesn’t think Keith is quite there yet, while Andrew thinks he handled the song fabulously.

With another group number, Do You Love Me? — another pop song, if one that has a veneer of musical theatre respectability by being included in Dirty Dancing: The Musical, I’d say that it shows that Lee has the strongest voice, Ben is the most charismatic dancer, and the others Keith and Lewis are good all-rounders, while Craig is more comfortable with this style of song than he is with ‘true’ musical theatre.


In the results show, Andrew tries his best to disprove Daniel’s suggestion that judges are fed lines. I mean, who would ever try and give such abysmal jokes to anyone? I mean, “The Curse of the Goat”?

I’m not goint to make any comment about this week’s mission about conquering a fear of heights — I get dizzy climbing the external steps to my first-floor flat, so I’m in no position to judge. Following the VT package, we get another group performance, Born To Be Wild, in which all the Josephs are good. For me, Lee stood out yet again, while Craig does his pointy-hand thing again and Keith does lose focus as he gets into position for each part of the choreography.

Next up, we see that Josh Groban has selected Lee to sing with. Rather cruelly, Andrew tells the others that they can be backing singers, which goes down like a lead balloon. The remaining four look like they’ve just been told they’re lowering the lifeboats on the Titanic, but won’t be able to get in themselves. That said, Lee does an excellent job and I find it hard to believe that any of the others could have been better.

And so we get to the climax. Asked who isn’t Joseph, Zoe and Bill plump for Ben, while Denise and John both go for Lewis. It’s public votes that matter, though, and Lewis gets through, with Ben and Craig in the sing-off. Singing Barry Manilow’s Through The Rain, and Ben’s acting training shines through. Craig has a possible edge vocally, but it’s Ben’s performance that’s the most believable piece of theatre. Andrew makes the decision to save Ben and send Craig home, and unlike last week I agree wholeheartedly. Craig has progressed phenomenally throughout the course of the series, but I think ultimately he would be better putting that experience to work in developing his stage presence as a singer, rather than heading towards musical theatre.

Grease is the Word: Week 8

There are a few things that I’ve learnt from this week’s edition of Grease Is The Word. First, the single-show format is looooooong. And I mean long with many, many o’s. At times Zoe, bless her, was clearly being given the sign to fill and she herself brings so little to the show that it’s quite a slog, in my opinion. Second, I hate the phrase ‘triple-threat’. It’s a personal thing, but couldn’t there be a nicer term? It sounds like a plan for waging war…

But enough of my foibles, onto the show. This week, you might remember, the format has changed and it’s all about the Dannys. Danny B, Michael, Anthony and Danny R opened the show with Greased Lightening, and it looked like they were having a blast. I found it slightly worrying that it was felt that other dancers were needed to fill the stage - a Danny should be able to do that on his own, of course, but I’ve a feeling that’s more to do with the producers of the TV show, rather than a comment on the abilities of the semi-finalists.

First up tonight, was Michael. I was really impressed with Michael last week, and I thought he was the strongest male in the show. I still think that he’s got the voice that you would most readily associate with musical theatre, but I actually thought he struggled just a little with the more complicated, technical parts of his first song, Burning Love, tonight. Still, it was an assured performance, and he got a massive reception. This week, the guys went for an acting class with Jennifer Ellison as their Sandy, and Ellison was very impressed with his stage presence. David Ian (and yes, I) agreed, but David Gest and Brian were both a little concerned about his American accent. He didn’t storm it tonight, then, but he certainly held the stage well.

Second was . The problems he has with his speech were clearly a problem in the acting class, and unfortunately he’s too honest for his own good - he openly admitted that he’s not ready for this role. But you have to say that he’s right; as Ellison said, he’s just got too big a mountain to climb. Danny R sang I’m Still Standing and, acting aside, it wasn’t really good enough. He’s got a decent voice, but his movement looked a little awkward, and he didn’t stand out from his backing dancers - that’s not good for a guy auditioning to be Danny. All the judges praised his singing, and indeed his heart, but said that he’s not who they’re looking for.

Next came Danny B. (By the way, do we think that the two Daniels in this competition have always called themselves Danny…?) Danny B got the best comments last week, and I was a little confused as to why. I saw that he had talent, but that particular performance didn’t grab me. But this week I got it. He did very well in the acting class, and while the poppier side of his voice grates with me just a little, he had fabulous presence during this rendition of It’s Not Unusual, he’s a really good mover, and I think he probably looked most at home on the stage out of them all tonight. David Gest said he’s got that triple-threat, and Brian said outright: ‘You are Danny Zuko’.

And so to Anthony. I didn’t think that Anthony clicked at all well with his new partner Vicky last week, and I can’t say I was over-impressed this time around either. He came over all star-struck when he did the acting class, and fluffed a lot of his lines, and when it came to his performance of Your Love Keeps Lifting Me Higher, all I could keep thinking was ‘this guy is a pop star, not a musical theatre performer’. His charisma, which David Gest sees as lovable cockiness, seems very studied to me, but then, so does Robbie Williams’s. He’s a really entertaining performer, and it was clear that he’s a favourite with the audience - I’m just waiting to be totally convinced.

It came down to the judges, at this point, to choose someone to leave, and I don’t think anyone was surprised that that person, unfortunately, had to be Danny R. All that was left, then, was for the remaining three to sing a ballad. I think I was flagging a bit by this point, and so couldn’t really understand the positive comments that all three received… I think I’ll have to put that down to my own state of mind. In the end, the viewers decided that Michael should be the one to leave. Personally, I’d have rather Anthony had left, as I just don’t think that this is his environment. But I look forward to be proved wrong in the final in two weeks’ time, when he’ll take on Danny B. Next week, the Sandy’s (Sandies?!) get their time to shine.

Daniel Boys: More Mr Nice Guy

Daniel Boys. Photo (c) The StageIt’s been a hectic week for Daniel Boys since having to leave Any Dream Will Do last Saturday. I was lucky enough to grab half an hour with him at his agent’s office as he paused for breath.

Scott Matthewman: Hi Daniel. So sorry about Saturday.

Daniel Boys: That’s okay!

Let’s start from the very beginning. Did you see How Do You Solve A Problem Like Maria? last year?

I did. I didn’t watch it avidly, but I did see a few of the episodes.

And was that what inspired you to apply for Any Dream Will Do?

No, not really. I have always loved Joseph since I was a kid, and the way the business is going, I just treated it like any other audition. I thought, “If I want to be Joseph, I’ll do the programme”. I never thought for one second I would get on the programme, and never thought I’d be taken seriously because I’ve already done things. I didn’t think they’d allow that, almost. So I was pretty shocked when I kept getting further and further.

In The Guardian this week, Elaine Paige described Any Dream Will Do as “the greatest threat to theatre today … Actors already striving in the theatre wouldn’t dream of putting themselves on these shows”.

Did she? Do you know what, this time last year when the Maria programme was on, I probably would have absolutely agreed with her. It was getting to the stage where reality TV is taking over every art form, and when I heard they were doing Maria?, I admit I did think, “Oh my goodness, now it is taking over musicals”. But unfortunately, art forms change, and this business changes a lot — I almost gave in, if you like. I just thought, well, if I want to do these parts which I’m not getting seen for, because I’m not a ‘name’, if you like, then why not? Not only is it amazing exposure, and an amazing showcase for an actor, you’re being seen by 7 million people every week and Andrew Lloyd Webber is sitting there watching you. That really can’t do that much harm, surely. So I don’t think I agree with her now. You have to play the game now, and that’s what I did.

Square Eyes 25 - 27 May

Ugly Betty (Friday 9pm, C4)

As I clearly have no life worth speaking of, Friday nights don’t come much better than this. A double-bill of Ugly Betty fun. Bliss! It’s all the usual, frothy run around, but with a crisp glass of wine and a pizza alongside, there are few better ways of enjoying watching the telly.

Have I Got News For You (Friday 9pm, BBC1)

Alexander Armstrong, the man who should be doing this gig on a full time basis, sits behind the desk for this Friday night ratings winner. He has the right sense of detachment combined with matey jocularity with the guests. Could it be time for another change of format for HIGNFU and have a full time presenter again?

Ronni Ancona & Co (Friday 9.30pm, BBC1)

One-time sidekick to Alistair McGowan, Ronni Ancona has now bagged her own show, mixing some top impressions and new, original characters. Ancona is always watchable, even if all the turns sometimes don’t quite work. There’s some genuinely funny stuff on display here and it deserves to do well.

Doctor Who (Saturday 7.10pm, BBC1)

Blimey, those scarecrows don’t half look bloody frightening! Human Nature, alongside the magnificent The Shakespeare Code and The One With the Boy in the Gasmask, is likely to go down as the finest that new Doctor Who has to offer. Based on writer Paul Cornell’s own Who novel (and making fans sweaty-palmed as they discuss the thorny issue of canon), this is a beautiful piece of television. The Doctor abandons his Time Lord heritage for a bit so he can avoid a bunch of bad guys who want his DNA. So he becomes human and takes on the identity of schoolteacher John Smith in a village in 1913. Problem being, he doesn’t remember being the Doctor, relying on Martha as his maid to look after things. But when the bad guys turn up, how can the Doctor save the day when he isn’t even the Doctor any more? Quite simply the best thing on television this weekend.

Any Dream Will Do (Saturday 8.05pm, BBC1)

You know the drill – we’ll see you on Sunday for the usual post match analysis.

Goodbye Children Everywhere (Saturday 7.40pm, BBC4)

BBC4 takes the concept of down the pub conversations about children’s TV and turns it highbrow in this brilliant piece that opens Children’s Television Week. With children’s television under increasing threat, this is timely stuff, and looks at the history of the genre from the 50s through to the 90s. This is followed at 9.40pm by The Kids’ Verdict where a panel of Noughties children review some of the best shows each decade has to offer and see what a modern eye makes of them.

Lusitania: Murder on the Atlantic (Sunday 8pm, BBC1)

In May 1915, the ocean liner Lusitania was torpedoed by a German U-boat, seeing over half of the 2000 crew and passengers losing their lives. This classy BBC docudrama pieces together events both on board the Lusitania and the U-boat in a highly credible manner, from the point of view of John Hannah’s survivor. Quite disturbing in places, this is quality stuff and very absorbing.

Bring Back… Dallas (Sunday 9pm, Channel 4)

If you can get past the often-tedious shouting of Justin Lee Collins, these shows can be quite entertaining on a nostalgic level. And in this case, all the cast are quite happy to be doorstepped by the tubby Bristol lad and talk about their days on this most classic of TV shows.

Kingdom (Sunday 9pm, ITV1)

I’ve become something of a Kingdom apologist. It isn’t high art, it isn’t edgy, it isn’t exciting. But it does have a kind of compelling sedateness to it that makes it highly watchable, not least of all for Stephen Fry’s likeable turn at the centre of it. So I’ll be sad to see it leave the schedules after tonight’s final episode that sees Peter coming to aid of a concentration camp survivor. The ratings haven’t been as disastrous as some may lead you to believe, with last week’s bouncing back to a healthier 6 million. Hopefully the second series will still be planned for next year.

Children’s TV on Trial (Sunday 9pm, BBC4)

Classic children’s TV from the 1950s is put under the microscope. How will it fare?

Sci-fi is like a bus...

There’s none on television for years, and then loads come along at once.

It seems the success of Doctor Who (and to a lesser extent Life on Mars) has finally persuaded drama commissioners that science fiction may have a place on mainstream British television after all.

BBC Wales and Kudos Film and Television are currently in development on Outcasts, which according to the BBC Press Office is about:

“a group of social misfits and criminals… sent to be the pioneers of a large new settlement on a near planet. They contain a variety of different types – from the brilliant deviant to the petty thief. They are the “outcasts”, fascinating but ultimately dispensable who must build the conditions for a new life.”

So, this is going to be a prime time drama set on an alien planet? Crikey, that’s brave. I for one am glad to see a show like Outcasts on the roster of drama developments, but fear how a wider audience might take to something that isn’t set on Earth.

Russell T Davies has kept Doctor Who’s sojourns to other planets to a bare minimum, both a cost and an audience friendly initiative. He told BBC News last year:

“The mockery we would get walking into a forest and saying that we’re on the planet Zagfon!”

while also feeling that sci-fi shows like Stargate and Star Trek are:

“subscription-based programmes for a dedicated audience.”

And with Outcasts, we have what sounds like the first primetime British drama to be set exclusively on an alien planet since… well, I can’t remember the last time we had that. Unless we count the last days of the original Doctor Who, which zipped around to different planets every week.

It’s a bold move. Doctor Who has, for the most part, cleverly anchored itself to an effective domestic backdrop. It’s one thing to accept Cybermen invading Canary Wharf, or Sam Tyler being zapped to 1972, quite another to get behind a group of people living on a totally alien planet.

Of course, I have no idea how the tone of Outcasts will pan out. Kudos aren’t stupid (although Holby Blue could be entered as Exhibit A to the contrary), and writer Ben Richards other credits aren’t exactly fanciful fare. Well, okay, Spooks might push that assertion a little bit…

Outcasts could be a good opportunity to bring a decent sci-fi drama to an adult audience (sorry, because Torchwood ain’t it – but I have high hopes for season two). Kudos and the BBC need to look to Battlestar Galactica as their blueprint. It might have space battles, but it has a sheen of reality that’s rare in science-fiction television. Make Outcasts about real people and real situations that have resonance, then it might just have a chance.

And please, no aliens with bumps on their foreheads. That way madness lies.

Now we are one: geeky nuggets of information

We are one year old today! Yes, that’s right — it’s been a full twelve months since TV Today launched as a blog. And to celebrate, I thought I’d unleash my inner geek (I keep it very well hidden — okay, not that well) and regale our lovely readers with some facts about what you lot have been reading in that time.

Top 5 most read articles

It won’t surprise anyone to know that our most popular page is the front page of the blog. However, each blog article has its own page, and over the last year, these are the five that have been accessed more times than any other:

  1. Lost: Season 3 casting news?

    Way back when everybody was desperate to find out what happened in Lost, The Stage accidentally stumbled upon a clue that Desmond (played by Henry Ian Cusick), a guest character in Season 2, would have a greatly increased presence in the following season, when his wife Annie Wood gave up her job to move out to Hawaii.

    Of course, since then Lost has moved to Sky One, and the series no longer has the grip on the UK it once did.

  2. Go, go, go, Joseph — but Grease is the word

    Apparently, the BBC and ITV decided that they would launch rival musical theatre recruitment shows. We’ll let you know how that progresses… :-)

  3. Patrick Stewart: Star Trek was a ‘calamity’

    Jean-Luc Picard himself talked to The Stage about how being hired by the hit TV show sidelined his theatrical career.

  4. The Murder Game

    Our piece about the Emmerdale online game revolving around Tom King’s murder came to become a place for the game’s players to hang out and swap clues.

  5. Any Dream Will Do: week 5

    Was it because it was the week the guys stripped down to their loin cloths? Or was it because love-him-or-hate-him Seamus got the boot? Either way, this edition of our weekly ADWD recaps remains the most widely read to date (although last week’s is catching up fast…)

If you’re on the blog front page, continue reading for some more factoids about the last year…

The Tomorrow People?

Just what the heck is going on with EastEnders (aside from the usual, that is)?

Friday’s much-hyped stunt-centric episode was one of the most bizarre, drawn out, melodramatic segments in the show’s long history. Basically one long stunt sequence and lots of shouting spread out over two nights. I have to admit watching slack-jawed in amazement as events played out in the most hackneyed way imaginable.

A sequence of events that led to Peter Beale unconscious on the side of a lake after nearly drowning took an entire episode, where most soaps would have had it over and done with in about five minutes. Emmerdale plunges a car into a lake pretty much every week and they’ve got very good at it. Script calls for car to crash into lake? Right, let’s crash the car into the lake. Job done!

Down Walford way, if a car needs to crash into a lake, we have to take a detour via Slough, stop off for a burger, play a round of golf, do the laundry, get lost on the ring road, stop for a pee, and then we get to crash the car. Friday’s episode of ‘Enders made Casualty look like it has the pace of 24.

And then we have to endure lots of tedious shouting from Ian and Phil, before Mr Mitchell does his best David Hasselhoff and goes all Baywatch on us. By this stage, the pizza menu has become much more interesting…

But that’s ain’t the end, not by a long stretch. We have yet to experience EastEnders’ most outlandish, let’s-stretch-our-audience’s-patience, bonkers moments ever.

Peter and Lucy Beale are psychic!

Yes, they are, it was on telly and everything, so it must be true. As Peter is left alone in a sinking car, water up to his ears, he cries out for help… cries that, inexplicably, are heard miles away in The Queen Vic by his sister, Lucy…

Gasp!

That means… they’re telepathic! What other explanation is there, other than a director who’s trying to make ‘Enders a bit arty? What a brilliantly realised piece of edgy, window-on-the-world writing that was. I think I just heard my mother switching off in Halifax. Rather than worrying about a baby abduction storyline upsetting people, I really think EastEnders should be more concerned about ridiculous plot moments that insult the intelligence of a loyal audience.

But wait a minute… Perhaps this is part of some new initiative on the part of the producers to cash in on the current vogue for spin-offs. We’ve had Holby Blue (oops, some of our ratings are missing), Torchwood, the forthcoming Rogue Spooks and now… a reboot of 70s kids classic The Tomorrow People starring Peter and Lucy Beale. Fantastic!

They’ll be able to teleport, read people’s thoughts and move objects with their minds, operating from a secret base deep beneath the site that used to be the Dagmar. There, with the aid of their supercomputer, DEN, they will launch a war on crime, injustice and preventing Juley Smith ever returning to Walford. No wildly unrealistic storyline will go unchallenged in their pursuit of justice and truth for all Walford residents.

Well, it’s either that or Minty: the Wilderness Years.

Not such a good deal?

Oh dear. Perhaps Five may have been a little too hasty in emptying its piggy bank of a rumoured £300 million in hard cash to secure the rights to Neighbours over eight years, starting in 2008.

It seems Neighbours on its native soil has taken an alarming tumble in the ratings, dropping as low as 700,000. Neighbours has traditionally lost out to rival soap Home and Away on native territory. Home and Away, which is also shown in the UK on Five, regularly rates upwards of a million viewers, and the gap between the two shows has become more pronounced in recent years in Australia.

Dan Bennett, drama executive for Channel Ten in Australia told the press recently that:

“Certainly, the figures we’re getting now aren’t a great basis for our nighttime schedule.”

Ouch!

Suddenly Neighbours doesn’t look such a good bet, casting into doubt whether the show will actually be around for another eight years. I’m sure Five wouldn’t end up out of pocket if Neighbours were to close its doors for the final time before the current deal is up, but it would leave a liberal smearing of egg on face.

And then the winners become the BBC who would look like a sensible broadcaster with a far-reaching vision to dump a show with an uncertain future from its schedules.

As for Auntie’s strategy on the Neighbours front, I wouldn’t be at all surprised if plans are already afoot to dump the evening repeat slot as soon as possible. The sooner the schedules can be adjusted ahead of the handover, the better really. Although quite what would go in there is anybody’s guess. But somewhere down the line, it might just be on the cards for Doctors to get a little bit more cash thrown at it in the hope of retaining the Neighbours loyalists. Who knows, an evening repeat might not be totally out of the question.

Watch this space.

Did Casualty deserve its Bafta?

Before Sunday’s BAFTA TV awards, most commentators were speculating over whether EastEnders or Coronation Street would win the Continuing Drama award (the posh name for ‘Best Soap’). That Casualty trounced both took everyone — including, it seemed to those watching, the Casualty team themselves — by complete surprise.

The Sun reported that ‘Soap bosses were in shock’, but one soap boss definitely wasn’t — John Yorke, the BBC’s Head of Continuing Drama and the man ultimately responsible for the Holby soap.

In a blog post on Broadcast magazine’s website, Yorke — who also oversees EastEnders as well as independent commissions such as Life On Mars and The Street — feels that perceptions of the series in the press are out of step with the audience:

Casualty is one of those shows that journalists tend to take for granted. For 21 years it has been toiling away on a Saturday night as the bedrock of the BBC1 schedule. Often perceived as less glamorous — or as not sensational — as the soaps, but still profoundly successful, it is largely ignored by critics but loved by its legions of fans.

Its revival, Yorke argues, is down to Waking The Dead creator Barbara Machin, who has returned to the show she used to write for as a series consultant.

All of which is true — and, as Yorke reveals, each series’ submission for the Continuing Drama award consists of just one episode. For Casualty, that episode quite rightly deserved to wipe the floor with the competition:

What they missed was a brilliant piece of popular telly at its best. It was shot entirely on Steadicam, employing an extremely complex narrative style (the same story told from four different points of view). It had a director (Diarmuid Lawrence) and actress (Holly Aird) who were brave enough to come back and work on a show that neither of them needed to do. Plus it had the regular Casualty team raising their game to heights they hadn’t touched in years.

Said episode, Killing Me Softly, was broadcast as the first part of a two-episode story last Christmas. At the time, I blogged about it, describing it as

the most surprisingly original and affecting drama to be shown this Christmas

And you know what? I still stand by that. It was, and is, the benchmark for what a ‘Christmas special’ of an established format can do.

But here’s the thing — not only was it head and shoulders above much of the rest of Christmas television, it was also far, far better than a usual episode of Casualty. Since that episode, the series has reverted somewhat to type — still producing good, solid programming every week; still getting guest actors of variable quality. And, sadly, still not of the calibre week-to-week of Coronation Street.

So, if you ask the question “Did Casualty’s Killing Me Softly deserve an award?”, I’d unequivocally answer ‘yes’. Ask me if Casualty as a series does, though, and you’d get a very different answer. And here’s the problem — if an award is to be given to a continuing drama, why are the dramas being judged on the basis of a single episode? How can one judge continuity from under an hour’s worth of programming?

Square Eyes 21-24 May

The Great British Menu (Monday – Friday 6.30pm, BBC2)

It’s no Masterchef Goes large, but The Great British Menu is mildly entertaining, mostly for the pained expressions on the judges faces when each new dish is presented before them. This week might be worth a look as it’s the final cook off before the dishes are selected that will be cooked at a dinner hosted by the British Ambassador in France.

Paul Merton in China (Monday 9pm, Five)

Paul Merton attempts to set himself up as the new Michael Palin with this four-part travelogue around China. More than just being pretty pictures, it’s also an examination of the deep cultural backdrop of the nation, something that will come under greater scrutiny on the world stage come the 2008 Olympics.

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

It’s Monday. There’s nothing else on. It’s no wonder then that New Tricks is pulling cracking ratings – there’s nothing to challenge it. That being said, it’s always entertainingly good. This week the team reopen a 20-year-old case when a murder victim’s camera is found in a Soho pub. Dennis Waterman’s daughter, Hannah, guest stars.

Roman Mysteries (Tuesday 4.30pm, BBC1)

A good sign that decent, imaginative children’s drama is still alive and kicking on BBC1 is tucked away on a Tuesday afternoon in this series based on the popular books by Caroline Lawrence. Four children in ancient Rome get to have a jolly old time of it and solve mysteries, which is just what young children in ancient Rome should be doing. Looks great and has some good guest support. Entertainment for adults and children alike.

Andrew Marr’s History of Modern Britain (Tuesday 9pm, BBC2)

TV may have come a long way, but there’s always time for a good old-fashioned bloke-talking-to-a-camera documentary series. Andrew Marr takes us through well-worn territory, being the history of post war Britain, and manages to paint a new shine onto the subject matter. His bouncy style and the excellent writing, alongside well-chosen archive clips bring the late 1940s and the big personalities into sharp focus.

Longford (Tuesday, 10.05pm, C4)

A timely (and previously postponed) repeat of Longford in light of Jim Broadbent’s well deserved win at the Baftas. The cynical among you might think Channel Four were hedging their bets. You may think that, I couldn’t possibly comment.

Champions League Final (Wednesday 7pm, ITV1)

Let’s face it, not much else gets a look in tonight with the footie action in Athens. It’s not our usual remit here at TV Today, but when your team is out there fighting the good fight in the name of kicking a ball around, it would be rude not to mention it.

The Apprentice (Wednesday 9pm, BBC1)

Seven candidates left, seven egos to deflate with a well timed “You’re fired!” from Sir Alan. This week, the teams select products and then attempt to sell them to the trade. But we’re not here for that, we’re here to see just what Katy did next… And, just because, let’s have a look at last week’s firing of Ghazal in glorious Lego form…

A Tabloid is Born (Wednesday 9pm, BBC4)

In a world where tabloid gossip and sleazy paparazzi pics are the norm, this is an interesting look at the work of Alfred Harmsworth and his far-reaching influence in the world of newspapers. Harmsworth launched the Daily Mail in 1896, which took a snappier approach to reporting the news than the wordier papers of the time. So now we know who to blame…

Hustle (Thursday 9pm, BBC1)

This fourth series of Hustle has taken time to find it’s feet, and the absence of Adrian Lester’s Mickey hasn’t helped. Thankfully things have settled down and Marc Warren now looks right at home in the centre seat. This week, the team take on a woman with a liking for ripping off charities, so that makes her fair game to shake down and see if a few quid falls out. Slick and fun, this is just the ticket for a Thursday night in front of the telly.

House (Thursday 9pm, Five)

It’s Christmas in Houseland, but there’s no time for festive spirit in the life of the grumpy superdoc. He’s still got a rabid cop on his tale trying to bust him for painkiller abuse, not to mention patients with curious conditions for him to heal in the usual imitable style. When a deal is offered that would send House to rehab instead of jail, he says no, no, no…

Grey’s Anatomy (Thursday 10pm, Living)

If you’re lamenting the absence of Grey’s Anatomy after its second season run on Five, then Living TV is the place to go as the cable broadcaster has bagged the first run rights to season three. It’s like Christmas has come early. If you’re a Grey’s Anatomy fan, that is…

BAFTA TV Awards: The results

I was trying to live blog this, but the web server clearly couldn’t cope with the repeated updates. So instead, here are the full results for the evening — hidden after the jump for those who want to avoid spoilers for the rest of the evening. Winners in bold.

Doctor Who 3.7: 42

TV Today readers with good memories may recall that I described Cyberwoman, the fourth episode of Torchwood as:

“Cyberwoman ranks highly amongst the worst 50 minutes of drama I’ve ever seen.”

So it was with some trepidation that I approached 42, seeing as both it and Cyberwoman had the name Chris Chibnall on writing duties. Thankfully my fears were unfounded as 42 was a taut sci-fi thriller with some genuine scares and the best performance yet from Doctor Who’s lead actor.

The conceit of the episode is simple - the TARDIS lands on a spaceship in deep trouble. In 42 minutes, the vessel will plunge into the heart of a very hot, very big and very orange sun, and the crew don’t seem able to do anything about it. With the Doctor and Martha cut off from the TARDIS, they literally will be frying tonight if our heroic Time Lord can’t get past some deliciously Galaxy Quest-esque sci-fi obstacles and get the engines back on line. Oh, and this being Doctor Who, there’s a parasite infecting members of the crew that makes them go a bit psycho and breathe the chilling words “Burn with me” in deep, ominous I’ve-been-taken-over-by-an-alien tones.

42 whips along at a cracking real time pace. 42? Geddit? It’s a bit like 24… Of course, like 24, there’s some fudging of the conceit, but not enough to trouble the scorer. As the Doctor takes charge to get the engines back on line, we have Martha paired off with a fresh-faced crewmember to get through a sequence of locked down security doors. And then the mystery hits, as the parasite possessed crewmembers (including the captain’s husband for a bit of emotional thumbnail characterisation) start to sabotage the crew’s efforts to escape. Why? Could it be that the crew aren’t victims of terrible circumstance and have been up to something they shouldn’t?

Grease is the Word: Week 7

Our usual Grease Is The Word reporter, Alistair Smith, is away, but fear not, I’ll be filling his shoes from now on. Well, maybe fear a little - I’ve got to confess I’m a Joseph girl and haven’t been following this quite as closely as I should. But hey, let’s not be negative, we can use this to our advantage. I’ll be bringing fresh eyes to the show, no preconceptions. That’s the story, and we’re sticking to it.

Not that they made it easy for me. I’d done all my research, found out who’s paired with who, who the front-runners were, who the audience liked and who the judges liked. But then nasty old David Ian threw a spanner in the works. This week, the couples were split up, and changed around.

First up, and first to try and “adapt and change”, as David Ian stated is so important, were Anthony (formerly with Alison), and Vicky (Michael). I’m not sure Anthony really got into the spirit of the whole thing very quickly: “My loyalties still lie with Alison” he said. Unfortunately, I don’t think he’s got over his previous relationship even now, because there was no spark in their performance of Ain’t No Mountain High Enough. Bizarrely, both David Ian and David Gest thought they made a great couple (I’ve never really trusted those two), but luckily Brian and Sinitta agreed that they just didn’t click. It left them cold, and me too.

Next came Danny R (who used to be with Alistair’s “little firecracker” Lauren) and Alison (Anthony’s ex, remember?). Alison was not at all happy with the pairing, and she was probably right to be wary. She reasoned that as they don’t really like Danny R, maybe they don’t like her either. It’s a theory that makes sense, but I’m not sure the judges are that clever. Anyway, they sang the Bryan Adams/Mel B song Baby When You’re Gone, and while they seemed to enjoy working together, like Gest said, there were no fireworks. Plus, Ian’s misgivings that Danny’s just not ready to handle the acting side of the role seem to have foundation (ok, I trust them sometimes).

Third to take to the stage were Bradley (formerly with Michelle) and Lauren (Danny R). Well, it’s an odd pairing certainly, as there’s such an age gap between the two - but then, Lauren is sixteen, and that’s almost always going to be a problem. They had the awww factor certainly, but Sandy has to change into a little minx, and Danny’s not the perfect English gent Bradley seems to be - it was all wrong. I felt incredibly endeared towards the pair of them, but you simply couldn’t imagine them in the roles they’re auditioning to play. As Ian said, Bradley’s clearly a hugely accomplished actor, and Lauren’s got a good pop voice - this just isn’t their competition.

Are you keeping up with the pairings? Now we’re onto Michael (Vicky’s previous partner) and Susan (who used to be with Danny B). For me, this was the performance of the evening, without question. Susan’s got a lovely, clean voice, and Michael matched her note for note in this performance of We’ve Got Tonight. At this point, it really seemed to me that the judges had put these two together basically because they’re the two they want to win, and you wouldn’t have thought any different from their comments.

Fifthly and finally, there was Danny B (Susan) and Michelle (Bradley). Now, you’ve got to help me out here. I thought that it was a perfectly good rendition of Endless Love - Danny certainly looks like a Danny, and Michelle is a really likable performer. But the judges went wild over this - Gest said they were the best couple and it was Brian’s favourite performance. Suddenly Michael and Susan were out of the window. I couldn’t understand that - it all seemed a little measured to me. But maybe I’m seeing measured when they were going for contained.

In any case, both of those couples got through the public vote (sense prevails for once) along with Anthony and Vicky (well, can’t get it right all the time), leaving Danny R and Alison, and Bradley and Lauren in the bottom two places. I really liked the joy and the sincerity that Bradley and Lauren have, but I wasn’t surprised that the judges saved the other couple - though I have a feeling that they were keeping Alison rather than Danny R. Because, guess what, they’re messing with the format once again. Next week, it’s Danny-only, and two of the guys will go; the week after, it’s the same for the Sandys. It makes sense to get the strongest all-round performers, and I’m all for getting the right people, but it makes you wonder why they went for couples in the first place. Overall, I think this show came out with the right result, but would suggest that Danny R, Anthony and Vicky are all living on borrowed time.

Any Dream Will Do: Week 8

This week’s opening song, Go Go Go Joseph, shows just how close all six remaining contestants are. Only two things really stood out for me — Keith seemed to be unsure of his moves as he was descending the stairs, and Ben’s over-exuberance looked out of place in an ensemble. Minor quibbles, then.

Glossing over the preponderance of yellow ribbons (you can probably guess my opinions on that sort of thing) and on to the solo performances — this week, on the theme of colour.

First up is Keith, who continues his run of solid songs with Brown Eyed Girl. Notably, he’s got very little choreography to contend with again this week - we haven’t really seen him have to move much, instead letting him deliver a song in his curious backward-leaning pose. John reckons he’s a definite contender, but fell back a bit on diction — Zoe disagrees, but noted he did miss some vocal show-off moments. Andrew repeats that he’d gone backwards a little in his voice.

Next up, Lewis sings The Rose, a song with a deceptively tricky opening, with just a piano solo beating out; it’s really easy to mess up the timing at that point, but he copes well. A much better performance all round after a run of so-so weeks. Zoe thinks his off-stage persona clouds over when he’s performing, and he didn’t portray the song well. Bill disagrees, saying his interpretation of a simple song was sensational. Denise chips in to back Zoe up, while Andrew says that he worked better on the song midweek.

Ben follows up with Blue Suede Shoes, and it’s the performance of the evening — with a great vocal that suits his voice, and a confident, crowd-pleasing choreographed routine. Denise says that he’s turned into a star, and it’s not hard to agree. Bill questions whether he can bring a vulnerable aspect to Joseph, while John reckons Ben is his pick for Joseph. Andrew praises his Elvis-like cheekiness.

New for the competition is a trio performance, with Keith, Lewis and Ben performing That’s Life. All sang well, though to my mind Keith’s posture still niggles with me. Andrew says all three were great, Zoe tells Lewis he was ten times better than in his solo, but Ben stood out; John agrees.

Singing Black or White, Craig is clearly struggling with the need to deliver songs in a musical theatre style. From the VT it’s clear he’d rather sing and dance the pop song as Michael Jackson originally did — but this is an MT competition, and to be honest he struggles. There’s clearly potential there, but with only a few weeks to go, he is clearly the weakest actor while singing. Zoe worries that he may fall back in to his old style. Bill feels he told the story of the song well, and Denise agrees, while voicing doubts about whether he could deliver an opening night performance. Andrew reiterates Zoe’s concerns that he may not manage well when he’s not surrounded by the show’s coaches.

Daniel is next, with Evergreen, that awful Westlife song that was foisted on Daniel look-a-like Will Young when he won Pop Idol. A couple of years ago, I saw Young do a live performance of the song that was a million miles away from the insipid version he released; Daniel’s version is closer to the original in style, but has a hundred times more heart. John thinks he was vocally perfect, but a little ‘beige’, rather than Technicolor, in performance. Zoe, who last week said Daniel wasn’t Joseph, said his performance last week didn’t excite her as she’d hoped; this week, she feels he gave a phenomenal vocal. Denise wants to see more emotion, and see through his smile. Andrew worries whether Daniel has what it takes to hold an audience for two hours.

Final solo performance of the week is Lee, singing Paint It Black. I find that, more than any other week, the defects of his sibilance, mispronouncing every ‘S’ as ‘Sh’, is really noticeable, and detracts from what otherwise is a superb performance. Bill reckons that is was leagues ahead of anything else tonight, while John would give him his leading man shoes — he’s Joseph. Andrew agrees, saying it was a magnificent performance.

Craig, Daniel and Lee are next up, with Don’t Rain On My Parade. As the VT points out, Craig has to cope with performing with two fully trained professionals. At times he doesn’t quite manage to pull of the some sense of effortlessness that Daniel and Lee manage, but overall he really steps up to the challenge. Denise thinks Craig looks a little lost at times, but Lee stood out. Bill praises Craig’s professionalism — and John feels he stood out over the other two.


In the second show of the evening, we’re shown how the boys got on with acting out a seduction scene with Denise Van Outen. Lee comes off worst in the acting stakes, succumbing to a fit of giggles, while Keith turns his love scene into pure farce with a performance that wouldn’t look out of place in Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em. If Michael Crawford had been replaced by Liza Minnelli. Only Daniel and Lewis seem to be comfortable throughout.

The final group song of the evening again fails to separate the six finalists, but it’s a great Saturday evening performance. It’s eclipsed, though, by the guest performance from Leon Cook, one of the leads currently playing Billy Elliot. If anything, it shows what a gulf there is between nearly all of the remaining Josephs and a true West End star.

As we come down to the closing stages, Zoe says that Lewis didn’t do it for her tonight; Bill picks Keith, Denise Craig and John gives a second thumb down to Lewis. It’s the public votes that matter, though, and the sing-off is between Daniel and Lewis, with Daniel getting the fewest votes. Are they mad?

The deciding song this week is Bring Him Home from Les Miserables. Lewis seems to have a few tuning issues at times, but Daniel gives possibly what is his best vocal performance to date. The emotion that John, Denise and the other judges wanted is there in spades. However, Andrew saves Lewis, meaning that Daniel is out. Andrew says that he thinks that while he had expected Daniel to stay in for a couple more weeks, it was always likely to go this way. I can’t say I agree. And in his closing Close Every Door, Daniel shows that the emotion was always there, if he had the song to show it off.

So one professional gone; one still left in. It’s clear that this year won’t simply be another retread of last year’s Maria? — the question remains, is that good or bad for the West End?