June 2007 Archives

The Sky man cometh! Oh yes, I’m a dither of excitement that tomorrow I’m finally getting Sky+ installed. Everybody tells me it will revolutionise my viewing life, but if it doesn’t, I’m not quite sure which number to phone. So is there anything worth pressing that series link button for this weekend?

The Shield (Friday 11pm, Five)

Kids may know him as Ben Grimm, aka The Thing in The Fantastic Four movies, but for me Michael Chiklis will always be detective Vic Mackey in one of the best cop dramas of all time. The sixth series begins on Five tonight, and the strike team are looking to avenge the death of one of their own. Beware, Holby Blue this ain’t. Having said that, I’d pay good money to see Vic Mackey kick DI Keenan’s backside.

Friday Night With Jonathan Ross (Friday 10.35pm, BBC1)

Dame Shirley Bassey proves she’s still got the range as she flirts with Jonathan Ross and bigs up her new album. Hopefully Gok Wan won’t be giving JR any practical tips on how to look good naked.

Doctor Who: The Last of the Time Lords (Saturday 7.05pm, BBC1)

It’s season finale time, and after last week’s bonkers episode it’s anybody’s guess as to how it will all end. Preview discs for this episode haven’t been forthcoming, but it seems Martha’s out there leading the resistance against the Master, while the Doctor and Jack are still at the evil Time Lord’s mercy. I have one prediction for this episode – one member of the Jones family isn’t going to make it out alive, and my money is on the winsome and lovely Tish. Anybody want to run a book?

Jekyll (Saturday 9pm, BBC1)

Jekyll finally gets into its stride after two episodes of set-up, and the format has settled down for the real showpiece of the series to take centre stage: Steven Moffat’s effortless, insanely clever writing. I’m even warming to Nesbitt’s patchy turn in the lead role, and like Doctor Who’s Master, you can’t help but like the charismatic Hyde. But then, I’m guessing that’s the point.

Gavin and Stacey (Saturday 9.55pm, BBC3)

One of the best things to come out of BBC3 gets a complete re-run of the first series (we are assured there’s a second series on the way). I’ve eulogised this sweet, believable and, most importantly, funny sitcom in previous columns, so won’t go overboard here. If you’ve decided not to brave the expected rubbish weather this Saturday evening, I can’t think of anything better than cracking open a bottle of wine and watching this from start to finish. Actually, given five minutes, I could probably come up with something…

The Dame Edna Treatment (Saturday 10.25pm, ITV1)

A one-off edition of the hit and very miss series, celebrating dame Edna’s 50th year in showbiz. Guests include James Nesbitt, Jeffrey Archer and Robin Gibb. Not bad, not great.

Concert for Diana (Sunday 3.30pm, BBC1)

Erm… I’m down with the kids on this, I think a concert in memory of Diana is a Good Thing. But… why does it have to run from 3.30 in the afternoon until 10pm? Come on, I’m missing The Great British Village Show for this. At this rate, I’ll be watching Big Brother.

The Simpsons (Sunday 6.30pm, Sky One)

With the movie only a stone’s throw away, the world is going to go Simpsons mad. And when the episodes are still this good, why not? This week Kiefer Sutherland lends guest vocals in a wickedly funny satire on 24 that’s sees Bart and Lisa thwarting a stinkbomb at school. The clock’s ticking Jack!

Memoirs of a Cigarette (Sunday 10pm, C4)

A timely examination of the pleasures of the cigarette in light of the smoking ban that comes in on Sunday morning. If you’re a smoker, don’t watch this in a pub, it will make you gasp for a smoke. Tongue in cheek and fun, this chooses to show that we can have a sense of humour in the face of the nanny state.

Who would have thought that two new additions to the family tree of EastEnders’ Mitchell clan might actually signal a positive directional shift for the sometime-troubled soap?

In a few short weeks, Ronnie and Roxy Mitchell will totter into Albert Square for the upcoming nuptials of Phil Mitchell to loony lawyer Stella Crawford. And my word, if they don’t look like just what EastEnders needs.

For months now, the ‘Enders has been drowning in bizarre, stretched out storylines centring on psychologically unstable posh women. Thankfully both Dr May Wright and Stella are practically out of the door, and I can’t say I’m sorry (although I think Amanda Drew, who played May, is a terrific actress who I hope to see more of elsewhere).

Ronnie (played by familiar TV face Samantha Janus) and younger sister Roxy (Rita Simons) look like proper, ballsy traditional EastEnders women. And here’s a simple plea to the storyliners over at Elstree – don’t get these two wrong. It isn’t rocket science to give them some decent line and length plots to establish them within the mythology. It really isn’t, you know…

Similarly, there’s another underused weapon in the Walford arsenal – Shirley Carter. Linda Henry is far too good an actress to waste on limp storylines, and Shirley is far too good a character. She needs unburdening of her entry storyline now, extricating from the familial ties that will only ever peg Shirley as Kevin Wicks’s ex-missus. And please, when is Pat going to have a decent storyline? Has she actually done anything since bedding Patrick (a sequence I still have nightmares about)?

The departure of Pauline Fowler has created a vacuum at the centre of the show, and scripts have been floundering around for a way to fill it.

A soap can live and die on the strength of its female characters, and I have high hopes that Ronnie and Roxy will be just the tonic EastEnders needs to sort it out…

I was quite taken aback to read some rather negative comments over at the Guardian’s Organ Grinder blog today about Marcus Brigstocke. Seems that people aren’t particularly keen on the lad and think he’s a bit annoying. Well, they’re wrong.

Reading Brigstocke’s 60 Second Interview in this morning’s Metro (I was weak, okay? I don’t make a habit of it…), I was struck by how much sense the lad talks, especially on the subject of television.

“There’s too much arrogance in TV – too many people thinking just because they make programmes, they are more interesting and important than anyone else.”

This quote was in relation to his BBC4 show, Trophy People, which I have previously bigged up in Square Eyes. In Trophy People, Brigstocke travels the country to interview people with strange hobbies, including bell ringers, scrabble players and model plane enthusiasts. When asked if the original concept was to take the piss, Brigstocke firmly replies:

“I said at the original meeting that on paper it looked like we’d do what telly people do these days, which is to turn up with a camera and say: ‘You must be dicks because you don’t have the camera and we’re brilliant.’ It’s too easy to edit people badly and make them look stupid and it’s cheating.”

Is it me, or is this some of the sanest commentary on the TV industry we’ve heard in a long time? Blimey, I think I just outed myself as a fan of Marcus Brigstocke.

Well, I am. I saw his stand-up show a couple of weeks ago and he’s brilliant. Anyone expecting the cuddly Radio 4 persona will be in for a shock – I don’t recall that many fs and cs in Giles Wemmbley-Hogg. The air was positively blue (and he’s absolutely right about Richard Littlejohn).

Speaking of Giles Wemmbley-Hogg (as played by Brigstocke), the gormless toff’s most-recent misadventure, Giles Wemmbley-Hogg Goes Off to Glastonbury, is still available via Radio 4’s Listen Again facility, and it’s really rather funny. There’s no fs or cs here, so it’s safe for granny to listen to.

I’m actually mystified as to how anybody could be as down on Brigstocke as some of the Organ Grinder readers clearly are. He’s funny, he’s versatile (working across TV, radio, and the live circuit), works endlessly and is one of the most politically honest touring stand-ups. What’s not to like? (and with that I realise I’m opening myself up to big can of worms wriggling all over TV Today towers).

I even liked The Savages, so there!

Visit Marcus Brigstocke’s official website here.

So after much discussion, a Public Value Test conducted by the BBC Trust and lots of rants from non-Windows users who won’t be able to access it initially, the BBC’s new video-on-demand service, the iPlayer, is to become publicly available to users of Windows XP from July 27, exactly one month from today.

iPlayer will not have all the promised features when it launches as a ‘beta’ next month, with live streaming and integration of the BBC’s much-praised Radio Player coming later. Also, anybody who has already upgraded to Windows Vista will have to wait, along with those of us who use Apple Macs.

Promotional links to iPlayer content will appear on the Corporation’s own website, as well as its YouTube channel. The BBC are also talking to a limited range of third party partners who may be able to host promotional clips which will link back to iPlayer. The official press release lists examples including MSN, telegraph.co.uk, AOL, Tiscali, Yahoo!, MySpace, Blinkx and Bebo.

My question is, why not open this up further? At the moment, the BBC’s YouTube channel is the only one that disables embedding on every single video. If I want to alert you to, say, a promo for episode 3 of the increasingly patchy Jekyll, I have to link to it, rather than embedding a copy on this page. With iPlayer links integrated into the YouTube channel, though, embedded videos would acts as promotional inroads that would penetrate into the blogosphere, effectively turning personal webspaces into free promotion for BBC programmes.

The images to the right show some example screenshots of the iPlayer. The BBC has also provided this video, which requires RealPlayer, to give you a rundown of some of the features.

The iPlayer brand will be further used for on-demand facilities via mobile phones and cable providers, with a deal via Virgin Media already announced. This mirrors ventures such as Sky’s Anytime service, which uses the same brand across its Sky+ and broadband services, despite being implemented in ways that vary on a technical level.

From what I can see, the iPlayer structure and navigation looks like it should be quite easy to follow. I do hope, though, that once it launches we won’t see other forms of video content on bbc.co.uk disappear completely — as that would mean Vista and Mac users lose out straight away, rather than merely having to wait until iPlayer is available on their platforms.

Ashley Highfield, the BBC’s director of future media and technology, tells Media Guardian (free reg. required) that he is aiming for 1 million users of the services within its first year. If it works as promised, it could gain more than that. By then, of course, work on Project Kangaroo, which would deliver a unified on-demand service for any broadcaster to slot their programmes into, ought to be well under way.

While All Saints debuts in the BBC daytime schedules next month and could prove to be an obvious contender for the Neighbours crown, it seems Auntie has other plans bubbling away in the soap cauldron.

If today’s Liverpool Daily Post is to be believed, plans are already well advanced to find a possible replacement for the Neighbours come next summer. Former Brookside producer Colin McKeown has told the Liverpool newspaper that his company, LA Productions, is in advanced talks with the Beeb to produce a soap based in Liverpool.

While I’m sure McKeown, who has also served as writer on Emmerdale and Grange Hill and produced Liverpool One, is positive of his facts, this looks like more smoke than fire. While I relish the prospect of a possible new soap set in a Liverpool, I suspect McKeown is talking up a bit of publicity for a possible independent project. Certainly the naming of Jimmy McGovern as an executive script writer/producer sounds unlikely (although not totally beyond the realms of possibility.

I’m also not sold on the concept that the Beeb are looking to commission a 20-week run of two episodes a week. If the BBC is going to commit to a new daytime soap, then it really must commit. I’m talking five days a week, for an initial six months at the very least. In the current climate, nothing less will really cut it.

I hope the LA Productions project comes off, I really do. The more new drama, the better as far as I’m concerned, but I suspect this is far from being a done deal at this stage.

For my money, Doctors is still favourite for having a spring clean and being bumped up to premiere daytime soap on BBC1, with an evening repeat alongside.

Of course, I could be way off the mark and this time next year we might be sitting down to the return of Eldorado. Or Albion Market. Shudder…

No sooner have the removal vans been booked for popular BBC Aussie daytime soap Neighbours do we get the chance to see what the BBC may be lining up to take its place.

Metro reports that the BBC has acquired the rights to Australian drama All Saints — thankfully nothing to do with the uber-annoying Appleton sisters and the more talented other two, but a continuing drama set in a fictional Sydney hospital.

Apparently, we do not have enough BBC medical based soaps, being blessed with just Casualty, Holby City and Doctors. So now, we will have the lives and loves of Yvonne ‘Von’ Ryan and her friends and colleagues from Ward 17 to enthrall us.

The BBC will pick up the series from the beginning of its 2002 run, with a two-part episode that involves a fatal train crash. As is the way of these things, members of the team may be involved, with the requisite question marks hanging over their survival. After another two series of life on Ward 17, however, the series underwent a revamp and focus moved to the emergency department.

Quite how the British public will cope with yet another medical drama (especially when ITV is due to launch its own daytime medisoap, The Royal Today) remains to be seen.

All Saints debuts next month.

The Time of Your Life (Monday 9pm, ITV1)

After a cracking first episode and some top ratings, will The Time of Your Life be able to keep it up? I do hope so as this could turn out to be a clever little drama that plays around with the usual safe 30-something family/friends kind of genre. It certainly has a lot more going for it than Talk to Me. Genevieve O’Reilly is an intriguing lead as Kate, her emotions ranging from childlike curiosity to bitter anger and resentment at what’s happened to her. All in all, the prospects look good.

The Women’s Institute (Monday 9pm, BBC4)

Fly-on-the-wall documentaries don’t get much better than this, and the subject matter is a goldmine of material. In the modern world, do we really know much about the reality behind this most lampooned of organisations? After this three part series, enlightenment is assured.

The Tower (Monday 10.35pm, BBC1)

A new documentary series that charts the regeneration of the Pepys Estate in London’s Deptford. It’s a fascinating social portrait made over a period of three years, chronicling the regeneration of one of the tower blocks into exclusive private apartments and the affect it has on all residents. Shocking in places, this is rewarding viewing.

Tony Blair: My Part in His Downfall (Monday 11.05pm, C4)

The inevitable Rory Bremner rundown of Tony Blair’s Prime Ministerial career from the satirist’s own archive of material. Good fun if a little obvious.

Holby Blue (Tuesday 8pm, BBC1)

It’s the final episode of HB, and I’m only tuning in to discover if the renewal for this ill-advised series is just a sick joke on the part of the BBC. Here’s hoping…

Sensitive Skin (Tuesday 10pm, BBC2)

A BBC2 highlight of 2006 returns with a slightly different format, seeing Joanna Lumley’s Davina widowed and coming to terms with life without a partner (and a series without the sublime Denis Lawson). Sensitive Skin is quite beautiful to watch and the dialogue is intricately constructed, with Davina a delicate lily surrounded by crassidiots. Of course, she’d never tell them what she really thinks – she’s too classy for that.

Location, Location, Location (Wednesday 8pm, C4)

There’s only one property show worth making an offer on, and that’s Location, Location, Location. Phil and Kirstie are back to what they do best, with none of that relocation malarkey going on. It’s had a bit of a format tweak, and now two buyers are getting the Phil/Kirstie treatment every week. It’s not too much of a change, and the essential entertainment factor is still there. And I still love Kirstie a little more than I probably should.

Cold Blood (Wednesday 9pm, ITV1)

No Matthew Kelly this week, which makes for an interesting episode of Cold Blood, and might just about convince that there’s more life in this concept than might be apparent. Bill Ward makes his first TV drama appearance since leaving Charlie Stubbs behind, so many will be watching closely to see if he has the acting chops to make a go of things away from the safety net of those Weatherfield cobbles.

True Dare Kiss (Thursday 9pm, BBC1)

With The Time of Your Life and Channel 4’s Brothers and Sisters doing the business earlier in the week, Debbie Horsfield’s True Dare Kiss rounds of a good week for drama viewing. An event brings four sisters back together for the first time since a funeral 20 years previously – what dark secrets are waiting to be unearthed. A great cast is headed by Dirvla Kirwan, and once again, Horsfield has gifted the audience with some strong, believable characters and some fantastic dialogue.

My Name is Earl (Thursday 10pm, C4)

Earl tries to make amends with a girl he made fun of because she had chronic facial hair. When he catches up with her, he’s mortified to discover she’s working as a bearded lady in a carnival! This is sublime stuff and easily the best comedy on the box. Let’s face it, the competition isn’t exactly brilliant.

After last week’s Utopia left me hot and cold in equal measure, Doctor Who moves swiftly onto the traditional two-part season finale that usually brings spills, thrills and action galore. Year one we had Big Brother, Anne Robinson and millions of Daleks (not to mention a regeneration). Year two introduced Torchwood, a crowd-pleasing face-off between the Daleks and the Cybermen and the departure of the much-loved Rose. So the question is, have Russell T Davies and his reliable team managed to keep their powder dry for another year to give the faithful (and still rather large) audience another explosive season finale?

On the evidence of part one, the answer is yes, but there’s so much going on in The Sound of Drums you wonder if an extra episode wouldn’t have helped the story to breathe a bit more. We rattle through election day that sees the Master (aka Harry Saxon) rise to power as Prime Minister of Great Britain, the Doctor, Martha and Jack going on the run as Martha’s family are taken into custody, have five minutes to fill in the back story on the Master’s origin, supposed first contact with the cutely spherical Toclafane, a visit from the US President (and his subsequent death), the reintroduction of UNIT, a trip to an airborne aircraft carrier, the Doctor discovering the Master’s “paradox machine”, the Doctor ageing a hundred years and Martha escaping to carry on the fight as millions of Toclafane descend on the earth, opening a can of whup ass on anything that moves.

Phew!

A truncated Square Eyes this week, as here at TV Today Towers we’re still trying to get over the shock that Holby Blue has just been recommisioned. Sorry.

Glastonbury (All weekend BBC2/BBC3)

Starting at 7pm on BBC3 and then 8pm on BBC2, Auntie stops in at the annual mud bath to see which bands are wowing the campers on stage in Somerset. The coverage is usually pretty good, and some would argue it’s the best way to experience the event. Or not.

NCIS (Friday 9pm, Five)

Often dismissed as an also ran in the US drama stakes, NCIS is worth a look when there’s not much else on – much like tonight. Tonight’s season finale sees Gibbs (St Elsewhere legend Mark Harmon) waking up from his coma in time to foil a terrorist plot. It’s not quite up there with CSI, but it’s enjoyable enough fare. And hey, it’s got David McCallum in it, so hurrah for Brit actors still working in Hollywood!

The Rise and Fall of Tony Blair (Saturday 7pm, C4)

The inevitable documentary about the political highS and lows of our most recent premier. Quite how history is going to remember Tony Blair is unclear, but the first part of this mammoth examination is a good place to start.

Doctor Who (Saturday 7.15pm, BBC1)

A bonkers, brilliant beginning of the end for the third series of Doctor Who. It’s been a great ride, but we still have on episode to go after this, so enjoy. The Master becomes Prime Minister of Great Britain and brings the alien Toclafane to earth. But where is the Doctor?

Jekyll (Saturday 9.00pm, BBC1)

Episode 2 sees this new drama from Steven Moffatt build a much-more satisfying aura about itself, even if some of the performances let down the clever and tricksy script. James Nesbitt shines as Hyde and feels much more settled into the material.

Saving Planet Earth (Sunday 7pm, BBC1)

More sumptuous wildlife footage in the company of Sir David Attenborough. This feels like a natural progression from Planet Earth as he’s now considering the impact of man in the face of nature. Less welcome are the various celebrities who will be highlighting the plight of endangered species throughout the week at 7pm, which just feels mawkish.

News Knight with Sir Trevor McDonald (Sunday 10pm, ITV1)

Worth it for the title alone, this satirical look back at the last seven days in the company of Sir Trev might actually be quite good fun. Marcus Brigstocke is on hand to help out.

The world domination of YouTube has taken a step further with yesterday’s software update to bring a YouTube portal to Apple TV in the UK.

As I don’t have Apple TV (feels a bit pointless at the moment, to be honest), I’m finding it difficult to get overly excited about being able to watch photomontages of McFly and Girls Aloud on my TV at home. The beauty of YouTube is its immediacy – a friend sends me a link at work, I watch it, I laugh (or cry at the insanity of it all), I get on with what I was doing. Brilliant!

I’m having problems visualising myself sitting down on my comfy sofa with a cup of tea and spending some quality time watching prime YouTube clippage. Maybe I’m just not down with the kids (or could it be that life is simply too short?)

According to online coverage of the update, it’s simplicity itself to install and you could be trawling through YouTube within minutes. Hurrah!

But hang on, what’s this?

Only about 10,000 clips have currently been converted for Apple TV, which is just a fraction of the reported 5.5 million clips that you can access on YouTube. Which seems a bit of a swizz on the face of it. If you’re an experienced hand at this game we call YouTube, it isn’t going to take long to exhaust the parameters of what’s currently there.

Still, it’s an interesting development towards the eventual integration of our PC and entertainment needs, if a bit limited in the here and now.

However, the iPhone launches in the States next week, complete with built in YouTube portal, an addition I find much more appealing. I can see that fitting into the social-networking lives of youngsters, and soon YouTube material will be swapped across phone networks as prime cultural currency.

Probably.

You’ll no doubt know that, over the last twelve weeks, everyone at TV Today has been wearing our “I [heart] Doctor Who” badges on our sleeves for all to see (they’re lovely. Especially embroidered for us by Madame Nostradamus).

But if you think we’re bad, imagine what it must be like watching an episode with these two enthusiastic fans. Quite why anyone would film themselves watching telly I don’t know, but here we see their reaction to that revelation in Utopia. Warning: contains the sort of language that you’re not going to hear on BBC1 primetime…

Update: I’ve replaced the YouTube video with one that shows exactly what the girls were reacting to. You can still watch the original by going to its YouTube page.

TV Today told you a few months ago that Lou and Andy from Little Britain were due to make a cameo appearance on Neighbours.

Now, thanks to the glories of YouTube, you can see the result:

Ouch! Tycoon, ITV’s answer to The Apprentice, didn’t get off to the best start in the ratings, pulling in a measly 2 million viewers according to the overnight ratings (free registration required). That has gotta hurt, and will cast serious doubt on the show lasting in that slot.

Fair enough, I shouldn’t count a show out before letting it have a chance to find its feet and build an audience, but Tycoon had an iffy smell about it from the word go.

I don’t have a problem with a programme that attempts to emulate the success of another show (and Tycoon isn’t exactly a carbon cop of The Apprentice). That’s the way of the telly, but my main problem is with Peter Jones. I’m sure he’s a very nice bloke, and he’s very successful, but a TV personality he isn’t.

On Dragons’ Den he has the safety net of working alongside big personalities. Jones’s calm manner is a boon here as it complements the brash charisma of a Duncan Bannatyne or Theo Paphitis. On his own, I’m sorry to say, he’s just a bit dull. And it really brings this show down.

Sorry Peter.

I dread to think what would happen if he went into the boardroom with Alan Sugar. It would be a verbal massacre. Let’s face it, Margaret and Nick would probably have a field day with him.

So sorry to say, Peter, I think most of the audience are definitely “Out” on Tycoon.

In further news from the high-powered world of finance TV, it seems I’m never to be free of Katie Hopkins. It looks like experienced eyelash flutterer and Alan Sugar teaser Katie is in talks to go Down Under on the next series of I’m a Celebrity… If this is true, it confirms that all she was ever after was a career in the limelight.

I’m not going to begrudge anybody the right to earn a crust, but one only hopes that that Ms Hopkins consults her babysitters before heading off to eat kangaroo balls with Ant and Dec.

They call themselves Loppies — short for Lee-Obsessed People. I am, of course, talking about fans of Lee Mead, winner of Any Dream Will Do and now in rehearsals to play the eponymous Joseph at the Adelphi Theatre.

At the press launch earlier this week, The Stage’s Matthew Hemley caught up with Lee and his co-star Preeya Kalidas. The interview is now online.

I’ve always found Imagine… to be one of the most frustrating arts shows. Presenter Alan Yentob has a horrible habit of placing himself between the nominal subject of each film and the audience, as if he’s desperate for us to notice how good he is as a presenter — when, if he’s doing his job properly, he should be encouraging us to look not at him, but at something or someone else entirely.

Which is why it’s so nice to see him acknowledge that, in this BBC-provided clip from tonight’s Buzzcocks… Imagine a Midly Amusing Panel Show (sorry, not available to either of our non-UK readers), he openly mocks himself, walking aimlessly in front of VT clips of Never Mind The Buzzcocks presenter Simon Amstell, as well as the show’s title sequence.

In fact, both Yentob and Amstell seem to be enjoying taking the p*ss out of themseleves, adding something really rather special to what would otherwise be a clip show of the best of Amstell’s first series as the show’s regular host. In itself, that would be worth watching, but the extra material makes it unmissable.

• Buzzcocks… Imagine a Mildly Amusing Panel Show is on tonight, BBC2 at 10pm.

While Paul Potts certainly deserved his win on Sunday’s final of Britain’s Got Talent, one thing I did find odd — even on a a commercial channel such as ITV1 — were the number of occasions on which Paul’s ‘day job’, that of a salesman at Carphone Warehouse, got a mention.

Now, playing up the job that pays the wages for a contestant is nothing new — after all Connie Fisher was forever pitched as a “telesales girl”, and Daniel Boys as a “cement administrator”. But the number of times Paul’s employer was referred to by name did seem a bit excessive.

So, what’s this? The makers of Britain’s Got Talent, TalkbackThames and Syco, have just announced who will be sponsoring the next series of The X Factor (free registration required). The previous sponsor, Nokia, pulled out just days after Ofcom upheld a complaint of undue product placement in the show’s ITV2 sibling, The Xtra Factor.

So, who is to take Nokia’s place? Spookily, it’s Carphone Warehouse.

I’m sure the frequent mentions over the last week’s shows had absolutely nothing to do with the decision…

So the reassuring, calm, easy going presence of crimebuster Nick Ross will no longer grace Crimewatch following the next episode, after 23 years presenting the legendary show. “Ah well,” thought I on hearing the news. “23 years is a good long haul. I bet he’s looking forward to having a rest.”

And then the seething anger hit when reading through various reports and I suddenly realised that the inimitable Mr Ross has not had his contract renewed. Let’s just go through that again:

Nick Ross has not had his contract renewed after 23 years of presenting Crimewatch

Yep, Auntie Beeb is happy moving on one of the most experienced and reassuring faces it has left on its schedules. Are they mad? First Moira Stuart, and now Nick Ross. I dread to think who might be next.

I’m not going to go down the route and suggest that Ross’s removal from Crimewatch is influenced by his age (plenty of other reports are doing that for me), but I feel the BBC is walking dangerous ground here. If there’s even the remotest sniff of age discrimination at work, the Corporation will have an enquiry down on its head quicker than you can say:

And now on BBC1, Crimewatch with Fearne Cotton and Vernon Kay.

Nick Ross, TV Today salutes you and wishes you the greatest of fortune in your future projects. And you know what, I never once had a nightmare…

Over in our news section, Matt reports that Tiger Aspect chairman Peter Bennett-Jones has warned that user-generated content could lead to a decline in quality talent and see the “amateur taking over”.

There is so much trash out there and such a danger of a dilution of standards. User-generated content is 99.9% rubbish and there is a danger of the amateur taking over.

Which is a familiar argument to anybody who’s spent even the slightest bit online, especially in the world of blogging. Blogs are 99.9% rubbish, say journalists (predominantly those in print). But clearly some blogs have risen to the top, being read by thousands every day, and making money as they go. So why, when the number of revenue-generating blogs is so small and the chances of making a profession out of blogging so small, are so many people starting blogging?

The simple answer is that they’re not doing it for the money. The vast majority of blogs aren’t intended for a wide audience; most of them will have an audience in single figures. They exist because when the economic barrier to publishing is effectively zero, it appeals to people who aren’t interested in its economic value.

Clay Shirky coined the phrase mass amateurization in his 2002 essay, Weblogs and the Mass Amateurization of Publishing:

The search for direct fees is driven by the belief that, since weblogs make publishing easy, they should lower the barriers to becoming a professional writer. This assumption has it backwards, because mass professionalization is an oxymoron; a professional class implies a minority of members. The principal effect of weblogs is instead mass amateurization.

Mass amateurization is the web’s normal pattern. Travelocity doesn’t make everyone a travel agent. It undermines the value of being travel agent at all, by fixing the inefficiencies travel agents are paid to overcome one booking at a time. Weblogs fix the inefficiencies traditional publishers are paid to overcome one book at a time, and in a world where publishing is that efficient, it is no longer an activity worth paying for.

Then, in 2003, Tom Coates expanded upon the idea in (Weblogs and) The Mass Amateurisation of (Nearly) Everything):

It’s not just publishing or journalism that are going through a process of mass amateurisation at the moment. In fact over the last fifteen years or so pretty much all media creation has started to be deprofessionalised. We only have to look around us to see that this is the case — as individually created media content that originated on the internet has started to infect mass media. Hard-rocking poorly-animated kittens that once roamed e-mail newsletters (http://www.b3ta.com) are now showing up in adverts and credit-sequences, pop-songs written on home computers are reaching the top of the charts, weblog commentators in Iraq are getting columns in the national and international newspapers, music is being hybridised and spliced in the home for competitions on national radio stations. The whole of the mainstream media has started to look towards an undercurrent of individual amateur creation because of the creativity that’s bubbling up from this previously unknown swathe of humanity. Mass-amateurisation is EVERYWHERE.

But does all this amateurisation really threaten professionals? I think it probably frightens those at the lower end of the scale. The economic barrier to becoming a professional — both in terms of equipment and production costs, and in formal training — acts not only as a barrier to entry, but also as a safety net, guarding some professionals’ heels from being snapped at by young upstarts. Once that safety net falls away, some will surely have to raise their game or risk falling by the wayside.

But for many professionals, any fear of amateurisation will be unfounded. As with blogs, most people uploading their own content to YouTube are’t doing so with a viewing to making a career out of it, and are certainly not to make money. They’re doing so because it’s fun. Recent TV shows have shown that, for example, the public desire for new West End blood is best satisfied by professionally trained talent — be it Lee Mead, Connie Fisher, Susan McFadden or Danny Bayne; four performers ‘elected’ to West End leading roles by the public, and each with a professionally trained background. Britain’s Got Talent winner Paul Potts may not have earned a full-time wage from his voice before Sunday’s final, but he has been professionally trained and has competed in other singing competitions before.

The threat, if threat there is, will not come from those creating amateur content. It may come from over-eager television executives, wanting to be seen to be onto the ‘next big thing’, overplaying ‘user-generated content’ because they think it’s cheap and/or cutting edge (see my post from a year ago on this same subject).

But you know what? I quite like the idea that professionals are scared by the rise of the amateur. The ones that take that fear and use it to raise their game will be the ones who are truly worth watching.

• TV Today will be at UGTV’07 tomorrow. If you’re there too, do say hello!

Trawlermen (Monday-Friday 7pm, BBC1)

Masterchef may have gone, but the Trawlermen are back for more high drama in this excellent human-interest documentary series. Running throughout the week, we catch up with the crews of the Amity II and Ocean Venture as they head into choppy seas to bag a good haul of fish. It’s brilliant stuff, and one has to admire the calm manner of the crews as they work gruelling shifts in horrible, horrible conditions.

The Time of Your Life (Monday 9pm, ITV1)

A promising new drama from ITV, which could be a good sign of the direction the channel is going in this genre. Kate has been in a coma since she was 18, so when she wakes up at the age of 36, she has a lot of catching up to do! Her boyfriend’s moved on (or has he?), her parents aren’t speaking and her life has pretty much grown up without her. Comas are not particularly original, but here it’s used well as a device to bring us into Kate’s life as she has to adjust pretty damn sharpish. A well-rounded cast rises to the challenge of great material, with Genevieve O’Reilly particularly good in the difficult central role.

ER (Monday 11.05pm, C4)

Despite a terrible time slot, a season finale of ER is always worth tuning into as it kicks into the usual cliffhanging, high drama mode. As Luka leaves for Croatia to see his sick father, will the dishy doc ever return to be with his new wife? ER without Goran Visnjic scarcely warrants thinking about…

Andrew Marr’s History of Modern Britain (Tuesday 9pm, BBC2)

I shall miss my weekly appointment with Mr Marr, who has guided us through some of the most important moments of the 20th century with enthusiastic, knowledgeable aplomb. Considering that Tony is off next week, we come up to date with timely scheduling as Marr moves on through the twilight of John Major’s time at Downing Street and into the bright, brash Blair years. Hopefully this won’t be the last we’ve seen of Andrew Marr doing a Simon Schama.

Tycoon (Tuesday 9pm, ITV1)

I’m not sure what Peter Jones’s ITV vehicle is meant to offer that The Apprentice doesn’t, so imagine this will suffer in the wake of Sir Alan’s triumphant third series. The participants have ten weeks to prove that their money-making ideas have what it takes to make them oodles of cash and become the next Peter Jones. Out of all the Dragons from Dragon’s Den, Jones is the most charmless, and this would have fared better with Duncan Bannatyne at the helm.

Syed Ahmed – Hot Air? (Wednesday 9pm, Sky One)

Brilliant, it’s more Apprentice-styled nonsense! It was only a matter of time before Syed, who was doing a Tre on The Apprentice last year before Tre had even applied, got his own show. Bless him, he’s trying to market and sell a warm-air body dryer, and is singularly bad at it. It’s comforting to know that the more the world changes, some things stay the same.

Brothers and Sisters (Wednesday 8.30/10pm, C4)

A bit of a muted start for this US series that brings Calista Flockhart back to our screens. This double-bill also suffers from odd scheduling thanks to the Big Brother factor, with a half hour break between the episodes. This family saga looks like a bit of a slow burner, and once we get to know the characters, the quality cast and writing should start to shine.

Rome (Wednesday 9pm, BBC2)

Hurrah! Lots of British thesps get to toga it up again in one of the most hit and miss dramas ever put out by HBO. Mark Antony (James Purefoy) tries to save his own skin following the death of Caesar, proving his mettle in the political arena (as well as being bloody devious). It can all feel a bit OTT in places with much scenery chewing, but where else do we get this calibre of homegrown talent in such glossy material?

Cold Blood (Wednesday 9pm, ITV1)

Matthew Kelly returns as creepy killer Brian Wicklow along with Gemma Redgrave as DS Eve Granger and John Hannah as the enigmatic Jake. This third outing for Cold Blood is starting to stretch things a little now as there’s only so many ways you contrive to get Brian, Eve and Jake back together again. It’s like a low-rent Silence of the Lambs as Brian offers to help with a new investigation, but the performances (Kelly chief amongst them) just about carry this off. It’s worth watching for the sight of Russell Brand stretching his acting wings as a dodgy stalker.

Krapp’s Last tape (Thursday 9pm, BBC4)

Harold Pinter’s critically acclaimed return to acting in Samuel Beckett’s play comes to BBC4. There’s something awe-inspiring about watching one great master of the word speak the dialogue of an even greater master, and despite losing the immediacy of being in the theatre audience, this is very successful indeed.

Utopia presents one of the most troublesome episodes of Doctor Who purely from a reviewing perspective. I’ve never made a secret of my daftie credentials when it comes to Doctor Who. I can name all the companions in order, give a detailed description of a Taran Woodbeast, and expound on the complexities of production codes in the classic series at great length. I also appreciate the other side of Doctor Who, where it’s just full on brilliant and provides stunning, entertaining TV drama for the widest possible audience - see Human Nature/The Family of Blood for starters.

So how do I review Utopia, an episode that contains some sublimely cack-handed sequences of the variety that used to get the series sniggered at with alarming regularity? There are quarries, cringe-worthy savage future humans, and a grey depiction of the far future with overly serious men striding around corridors. On the other hand, there are some beautifully subtle performances (David Tennant and John Barrowman, I’m looking at you), a brilliant guest-star who makes this acting lark look effortless, and one of the most jaw-dropping moments that pushes my fanboy buttons like never before.

I’m going to rip the plaster off quickly, because having a go at Doctor Who is like insulting your gran. I thought the first 20 minutes were pretty dreadful. It had the hallmarks of that silly brand of TV sci-fi that sketch shows have been ripping the piss out of for years. We’ve zapped forward to the year 100-trillion and suddenly find ourselves in aliens-from-the-planet-Zog territory, previously criticised by Russell T Davies, so it’s a surprise to see his name on scripting duties. This wouldn’t have been out of place in an episode of Blake’s 7, and I love Blake’s 7. I just fear for the regular audience, the real people out there who might feel cheated by an unusually silly, over-earnest opening. Sorry…

Celebrity Masterchef – The Final (Friday 7.00pm, BBC1)

As I write this, I’m kicking myself as I totally forgot to set the DVD recorder for my favourite show (well, aside from that thing with the police box and the monsters). Oh well, the nice man from Sky is coming next week to install Sky Plus, so Series Link feature, here I come! Anyway, this show highlights why I love the tellybox so much. Anything that can make compelling TV out of three celebs cooking a steak has got to be doing something right. Nadia to win!

Jericho (Friday 8pm, Hallmark)

In light of Jericho’s recent reprieve from cancellation across the pond, it might be worth checking out what’ left of the first series in its UK home on Hallmark. It’s good stuff, and you can see why there’s such a dedicated fanbase behind the show. Watch out for Britain’s own Lennie James high up on the cast list.

The Professionals (Friday 9pm, ITV4)

Digital TV is great, isn’t it? Where else could I watch crass, violent, macho 70s crime drama nonsense that left me with a desire to drive a Capri when I was old enough? It’s rubbish, of course, but that neatly sums up that there ain’t much else on tonight worth watching.

Eight out of Ten Cats (Friday 9.30pm, C4)

Return of the mildly entertaining panel show hosted by the “hilarious” Jimmy Carr, where celebrity teams answer questions based on the week’s news. Sean Lock and Dave Spikey are on captain duties, but however funny this is, it’s no replacement for Ugly Betty in my affections.

Doctor Who (Saturday 7.15pm, BBC1)

Doctor Who fanboys should prepare themselves for some jaw-dropping moments this week that will strike at your very heart. The rest of the audience should prepare themselves for some silly running around in a quarry – which is no bad thing. John Barrowman is back as Captain Jack with a fantastic first entrance, and Derek Jacobi makes everything look so effortless as this week’s big guest star. Very much a game of two halves, but you won’t be disappointed…

Jekyll (Saturday 9pm, BBC1)

After his chilling episode of Doctor Who last week, Steven Moffat is on scripting duties for this new James Nesbitt starrer. It’s an intriguing beast that updates the Jekyll and Hyde story with a contemporary setting. In many respects this is a sequel to Robert Louis Stephenson’s original novella, which Moffat takes and moulds to his own purpose. This first episode feels confused in places, but I suspect that’s deliberate and more becomes clear next week. But there’s enough mystery and slick writing to make this a must-watch element of the Saturday night schedule.

Tiswas Reunited (Saturday 9.15pm, ITV1)

You were either a Swap Shop or Tiswas kid – there was no crossover. I was always firmly in the Swap Shop camp with its cosy jumpers and trustworthy presenters. Tiswas was just a little too out there for me, but in later years I appreciate the anarchy and fun on display so much more. Chris Tarrant and Sally James are back together for this one off special that reunites the gang one last time. Lenny Henry, Sylvester McCoy and Bob Carolgees are all on hand, and no doubt Spit the Dog and the Phantom Flan Flinger will be lurking around somewhere. What, no Cough the Cat?

Sex, the City and Me (Sunday 9pm, BBC2)

Cracking one-off drama starring the always-brilliant Sarah Parish as Jessica Turner and set in the cut and thrust world of the City. Merchant banker Jessica embarks on a dangerous journey when she attempts to sue her employers following the treatment she receives after having a baby. A fascinating look at the politics of power and gender in the workplace. Ben Miles, Shaun Dingwall and Sarah Lancashire round out the cast.

Britain’s Got Talent – the Live Final (Sunday 8pm, ITV1)

Well, against the odds, BGT has proved not only to be great TV, but a massive ratings winner for ITV to boot. And I’ll happily admit to being utterly won over by the concept and the acts on show, especially the overwhelming talent of opera singer Paul Potts. It would probably be churlish of me to say that tonight’s live final could be something of a one horse race, as that does a disservice to the other talent getting to this stage. One way or the other, I doubt we’ve seen the last of this incredible, unassuming talent. Although curse Britain’s Got Talent for making me dislike Piers Morgan a little less than I used to.

As all our lovely new readers won’t have any Grease is the Word or Any Dream Will Do coverage to look forward to this weekend, here’s some other reading material: this week’s TV news from The Stage.

• South Bank Show to explore modern themes of Macbeth
• Writer Flannery pens war drama for Channel 4
• Joseph and Grease stars are decided in TV show finales
• ITV launches estate agents-based comedy
• Coupling creator develops new BBC romcom
• BBC talent costs under review
• Grade looks to originality to regain ITV’s drama crown
• Full Grease cast is revealed

And speaking of Grease is the Word, have you caught Alistair’s podcast interview with the winners, Susan and Danny B, and judge David Ian? The Stage was the only paper allowed at Saturday night’s show, and these interviews were taken straight after the results were announced.

Also on TV Today this week:

• Any Dream Will Do, Week 11: The Final
• Grease is the Word, week 10: The Final
• Grease is the Word: The Final - The Live View
• Doctor Who 3.10: Blink
• Steven Moffat wants to bring back ‘Press Gang’
• When reality TV bites back…
• Is the BB love affair over?
• Signs