August 2008 Archives

The Tudors (Friday 9pm, BBC2)

A pivotal episode of my new favourite thing as the situation literally comes to a head for Sir Thomas More, who refuses to swear allegiance to his old friend the King. Not that Henry seems particularly bothered as he’s busy pulling peasant girls in the woods and luring them back to the royal bedchamber. As for Anne, things do not look good when there’s a problem with her pregnancy and H is still after a son and heir. With a season finale not too far away, who thinks Anne will be seeing season three? Bet now!

Comedy Connections (Friday 10.35pm, BBC1)

I’m amazed that Dad’s Army hasn’t been covered previously in this long-running series, but as it’s the 40th Anniversary of this most classic of sitcoms this year, it seems somewhat appropriate that they’ve finally got around to it now. Of course, we’re sadly fairly low on cast members to reminisce about their days in the Home Guard, but those still with us are all present and correct. Creators Jimmy Perry and David Croft are also on hand to provide some more behind the scenes insight into the genesis of Dad’s Army

Last Choir Standing (Saturday 6pm, BBC1)

This show hasn’t really done it for me, I’m afraid, but it’s proved an adequate diversion for a few million on a Saturday night, so it must be doing something right. I just haven’t been able to get past my irrational hatred for anything fronted by Nick Knowles (although on the plus side, he isn’t Matt Allwright). Who will be crowned the top choir of the competition in the public vote? Find out at 8.50pm!

The X Factor (Saturday 7.10pm, ITV1)

It’s business as usual once again as we’re still at the heat stage. Fun and games but not terribly exciting at this stage.

Dad’s Army (Saturday 8.40pm, BBC2)

After last night’s Comedy Connections, why not watch the real thing with a vintage episode of classic comedy in the company of the Walmington-on-Sea Home Guard. In Knights of Madness, Mainwaring and the boys stage a recreation of the battle between St George and the Dragon. Later, catch a repeat of Comedy Connections at 11.10pm on BBC2.

Gladiators: the Legends Return (Sunday 8pm, Sky One)

Old lags Wolf, Rocket and Trojan return to the Gladiators arena to take on their Noughties counterparts in a special episode of the revived series. I’m so pleased Ian Wright is now presiding over some quality, highbrow television and has left his court jester days on Match of the Day behind.

Fiona’s Story (Sunday 9pm, BBC1)

Thank goodness for some decent drama this weekend, but beware, Fiona’s Story is not an easy or comfortable watch. It’s powerful, intense, ambiguous and thought provoking. Gina McKee is housewife Fiona who occupies a seemingly perfect world with lovely kids and a brilliant husband in Simon (Jeremy Northam). That world is destroyed when the police turn up to arrest Simon for allegedly downloading images of abused children. McKee and Northam are superb as emotions and accusations fly, and this is heavyweight stuff. Heartbeat it ain’t…

Spooks: Code 9 (Sunday 9pm, BBC3)

This week the team tackle a group of eco-terrorists who are planning a bank heist to fund their activities and group leader Charlie is on an intelligence-gathering mission involving a nuclear scientist. I wonder if this is what The Famous Five would be like if Enid Blyton was writing today? Let’s face it, all that’s missing is Timmy the Dog and all that ginger beer.

The drought of summer is officially over as far as TV Today is concerned as our main television networks gear up for their autumn launches. There was great excitement this morning at TV Today towers as the trailer for BBC One’s new Saturday evening family drama, Merlin, launched on the net ahead of cinema and TV showings this weekend…

First thoughts? It’s a very well put together trailer, very fast and seems to sell the story effectively. The whole thing looks beautiful, with some striking sets and costumes, and a cast that takes in some bright young things and some old scenery chewing pros.

So I was at the press launch of Strictly Come Dancing today, which was structured so much better than last year’s event. Held at the Cafe de Paris, events kicked off with Bruce Forsyth seemingly confirming the rumours that this series, the sixth, would be his last — but delivered in a way which meant that no-one really knew if he was joking or not. Some really badly written banter between Brucie and co-host Tess Daly didn’t really help matters — but once all the professional dancers came out and treated us to a group jive, all was forgiven.

It was my first opportunity to see all the professional dancers performing ‘live’, and in the intimate venue it was thrilling to watch.

And then it was time to meet the contestants…

And to end the day, how about a bit of human interest with this charming news story about Gavin and Stacey co-creator and actress Ruth Jones being reunited with her pet tortoise, 55 year-old Tom.

Tom had been missing for five weeks and was found in a recycling centre after getting accidentally caught up in Jones’s recycling regime. There’s nothing to say on this story beyond “Awwwww”. I just thought it was sweet and wanted to share.

While I’m still hoping that we’ve seen off the worst that the summer schedules have to served up (although I may not hold my breath too much), I’m finding my viewing habits dominated in turn by an old favourite and a fairly new kid on the block…

The West Wing is, for many and varied reasons, one of my all time favourite TV dramas. Even in the dodgy years of late season four and most of season five, there was always something to engage me as a viewer, with few, if any episodes, falling short of the mark. Dialogue that fizzes with energy, direction that zips along with style and pace, and actors who rise to give the best material of their careers the justice it deserves all combine in one very potent brew.

My love for this show even goes beyond that of my beloved Doctor Who (and you know what that means to me) Last night my latest WW marathon reached the end of season two with the episode Two Cathedrals, and perhaps one of the greatest season finales ever broadcast. Hyperbole? Not a bit of it!

In this week’s print issue of The Stage, I talk to actor, writer and director Noel Clarke (Doctor Who, Kidulthood, Adulthood) about his career and his plans for the future.

That interview won’t be available online — but Noel has such a lot to say that there wasn’t room to include everything we talked about. So here on TV Today we present a Doctor Who Confidential-style interview containing some bits that also appear in print, and lots that doesn’t.

Scott Matthewman: How long did it take for you to get Kidulthood and Adulthood made?

Noel Clarke: I wrote Kidulthood in 2002. There were a few things around at the time that I didn’t think were as authentic as they could be. It wasn’t written out of anger, but it was just, “This is the way I think it is, this is the way that I’ve seen it.”

We shot it in November, December 2004 and it came out in March 2006, so that was about three and a half years in total. Adulthood was a lot quicker. That wasn’t written until Kidulthood came out, so that was May 2006.

Did you ever think you’d go back and revisit some of the characters?

That was never my intention. In a weird way, it was kind of forced upon me. With other ideas that I’d written, people would say, “Oh, the script is brilliant, but it’s not your voice.” And that kind of stuff would annoy me. But at the same time it was them trying to say, “We’re comfortable with you writing what you’ve written, and that’s a safe bet.”

So essentially I was forced to do it in a roundabout way. No-one actually told me to do it. But it was kind of like well, I can write rom-coms and I can write thrillers, but if people tell me it’s ‘not my voice’, then I might as well stick two fingers up and write something they think is my voice — but at the same time create a bit of history by making a sequel, which doesn’t really happen, and making it a bit more commercial.

So you’d like to branch out into other genres?

Ideally, that’s what I’d like to do. I’ve made a conscious choice that I don’t want to do something which is similar, or if I do then it has to go in a different direction. It’ll have to be a different genre. I’d rather not do anything than do the same film again, and get pigeonholed.

I just want to make films and take the audience that watch my films into different directions. So I can broaden my horizons — and hopefully theirs.

You were able to branch out into sci-fi with an episode of Torchwood [Series 1’s “Combat”]. Was that very different?

Yeah, definitely. It was a different sort of work — I usually write things on spec so I do what I want. But when you write for TV you have to fit within a certain structure or a certain series arc, especially with later episodes. Everyone’s kind of, “This has to happen because our relationships or our characters are here.” It can be a more difficult discipline.

It’s excellent news that the BBC has announced the commissioning of another series of popular detective show New Tricks, which ended its fifth series last night with a healthy 7.8 million viewers and an average share of 31%.

Part of the appeal of the fifth series has been Alun Armstrong’s ever-watchable turn as Brian Lane, the obsessive fact-hunter and social misfit who has struggled, and in last night’s episode failed, to stay on the wagon.

It was a typically downbeat end to a series which tends to walk an uneasy path between jocular slapstick and social realism. Given the quality of the central cast, it’s no real surprise that the whole show actually works better when the subject matter gives them something to get their teeth stuck into. The final moments of last night’s episode, as Brian’s wife (playd by Susan Jameson) found her husband completely intoxicated, was heartbreakingly played by both. In recognition, the end credits rolled with a suitably pensive sound track, eschewing the normal jauntiness of the New Tricks theme as sung by fellow cast member Denis Waterman.

And how much better that ending was. What a shame that the start and end of each episode is normally drowned out by the atmosphere-sucking rubbishness of that theme. It may suit a sitcom, but as an introduction to a drama which despite its lighter moments explores some really dark places, it is completely inappropriate.

Let’s cross our fingers and hope that when New Tricks returns for a sixth run, it can be heralded by some far more suitable music. Although I fear people have been wishing for that since its first series…

Holby City (Tuesday 8pm, BBC1)

It’s always worth checking in every now and then on the lives and loves of Holby General, and it’s pretty much business as usual this week with lots of corridor walking, inter-staff affairs and arguments over the operating table. The central story this week involves an enigmatic millionaire evangelist who offers to stump up the cash to have the conjoined twins separated. Ulterior motive? Probably…

Mutual Friends (Tuesday 9pm, BBC1)

A promising new comedy drama with a great cast, including Marc Warren, Keeley Hawes and Alexander Armstrong. A group of friends are thrown back together following the suicide of an old friend and they find their lives are not as solid as they thought. Warren is at the centre of things as Martin, with an unhappy wife (Hawes) and Armstrong as his ageing Lothario mate Patrick adding to his general confusion and impending mid life crisis existence. Mutual Friends is likeable in a very familiar kind of way and there’s some sharp dialogue that might just help this along as the TV schedules coast that downhill run into autumn.

The Last Word (Tuesday 10.35pm, BBC1)

Slightly more successful than last night’s outing in Hugo Blick’s series of new monologues, this second piece features rarely-out-of-the-tabloids Rhys Ifans as a farmer attempting to break free from a domineering mother, as always seeking the last word of the title. Ifans is a fine actor, his tabloid adventures taking away from the fact that he’s actually a master craftsman when given fantastic material. Thankfully this is one of those occasions.

Doctor Who (Wednesday 7.05pm, BBC3)

With the finale of the last series of Doctor Who still fairly fresh, cast your mind back to 2005 and the finale of series one that saw Eccleston morph into Tennant for a bit of compare and contrast. It’s an interesting watch given the distance of a couple of years, with a restraint exercised in Russell T Davies’s script that seems to evaporate in the coming years as the production team became more confident with what they could achieve (for better of worse in some cases). Platoons of Daleks flying through space and the Doctor making the ultimate sacrifice to save the universe and Rose make for an exciting finish, but it’s the arrival of Tennant that firmly sets this series on course to critical and popular acclaim. Fantastic!

My Zinc Bed (Wednesday 9pm, BBC2)

A sinister drama that adapts David Hare’s play on the nature of addiction that positively fizzes with rapier sharp dialogue and a couple of great performances from Jonathan Pryce and Paddy Considine. Pryce is multimillionaire Victor Quinn, who preys on his wife’s (Uma Thurman) vulnerability brought about by addiction. And then arrives alcoholic poet Paul (Considine) into their lives, and the game gets a new dimension. Thurman doesn’t quite fit this exceptional piece, and some of the inherent stage quality might put some people off, but My Zinc Bed is well worth a look despite this.

The Wrong Door (Thursday 10.30pm, BBC3)

BBC3 continues to court a younger, hipper audience and brings special effects and CGI trickery to the sketch show format to create a fun new comedy. It’s visually brilliant - I can’t remember a sketch show that ever had a velociraptor running around a park - but as with any sketch show, the actual mechanics of the comedy itself can be hit and miss. Thankfully there are more hits than misses here, and I’ll be back next week to see how things develop. And for any new sketch show, the very virtue of it not being the dire The Kevin Bishop Show raises things up a level before the first episode has even aired.

The Nominees (Thursday 10.30pm, FX)

After the well-deserved success of Chris Lilley’s brilliant Summer Heights High on BBC3 earlier this summer, it was only a matter of time before somebody picked up the Australian comedian’s 2005 forerunner. And here it is, with more of the same style of comedy following the lives of a disparate collection of characters that are all up for the award of Australian of the Year. If you didn’t get Summer Heights High, you won’t get this, but it’s just as good, if not better, than Lilley’s international breakthrough.

The Tudors (Friday 9pm, BBC2)

Henry isn’t a happy little king this week (although as a rule of thumb it’s usually hard to tell). His beloved Anne Boleyn is on a downer following the birth of Elizabeth, which has taken the wind out of H’s sails a bit, not to mention Sir Thomas More sticking his oar in on the royal child’s baptism. It’s all enough to drive a king to distraction, but it’s surely only a matter of time before he’s back on his game - he’s still got a few more wives to get through, after all. Entertaining, stylish and hopelessly inaccurate on historical detail - I love it!

Comedy Connections (Friday 10.35pm, BBC1)

In the great pantheon of the sitcom, Sorry! is not one that generally finds its way to the lips of televisual scholars (aka your mate down the pub). But this Ronnie Corbett vehicle that ran throughout the 1980s is more beguiling than its reputation suggests, full of character, wit and some brooding subtext bubbling beneath the surface of Corbett’s timid librarian Timothy Lumsden. Corbett often loses out to his more feted colleague, the late Ronnie Barker, in the comedy stakes thanks to Porridge and Open All Hours, but in Sorry! he was note perfect, and this edition of Comedy Connections quite rightly celebrates those qualities. Language Timothy!

Z Cars (Friday 10pm, BBC4)

It might feel a little odd sitting in on a Friday night watching Z Cars, but there isn’t much else on, and this, also shown last Tuesday, is a little bit of TV history and pure gold. It’s the first episode (and beautiful quality) of the classic BBC series that brought a new style of production to the police procedural. Detective Inspector Barlow and Detective Sergeant Watt recruit four feisty PCs to man the new unmarked crime cars to patrol the towns of Seaport and Newtown - Z-Victor 1 and Z-Victor 2 - the Z Cars. After nearly 50 years, this is still brilliant, vibrant stuff, with a great cast pulling it all together, with Stratford Johns proving a magnificent figurehead as Barlow, a character who, along with Watt, would outlast the original show that spawned him. Watch and wonder why we can’t make them like this any more.

Doctor Who Weekend (Sci-Fi Channel Saturday/Sunday/Monday)

In the absence of any new Who until Christmas, the Sci-Fi Channel dusts down some gems from the “classic” series, featuring Tom Baker, Peter Davison, Colin Baker and Paul McGann, with Patrick Troughton hitching a lift in The Two Doctors. The best of the weekend’s viewing are The Ark in Space on Saturday, seeing Baker, T taking on the insect Wirrn on a space station in the far future, and The Caves of Androzani on Sunday, Peter Davison’s swan song in the role and a contender as finest outing for the original run. Takes me back…

Last Choir Standing (Saturday 6.30pm, BBC1)

We’re at the semi-final stage of this talent show that, personally speaking, has lacked a certain sparkle.

The X Factor (Saturday 7.30pm, ITV1)

Week 2 and The X Factor juggernaut is in Birmingham and London to laugh and point and subject people who really don’t deserve it to some ritual humiliation. And don’t tell me that they didn’t have to audition - Simon Cowell’s terriers in the early selection stages before contestants even get to see the Four Who Rule should be ashamed of themselves for picking hopefuls on laugh value rather than talent. Of course, there are the arrogant, deluded coves that really do know better, but it’s the cruel elements of this show that have started to make me feel uncomfortable. There is entertainment to be had here, but I sometimes wonder at what cost.

Takin’ Over the Asylum (Saturday 10pm, BBC4)

A Bafta winning tour de force for all concerned, Takin’ Over the Asylum, rarely seen since first transmission, receives a long overdue dusting down. My word, it’s one of the best things ever shown on this little box we call TV. Ken Stott is wonderful as down at heel aspiring DJ Eddie McKenna, who takes on the challenge of bringing back a radio station to the drab and miserable corridors of a Glasgow psychiatric hospital. It’s a touching, poignant and funny depiction of a difficult subject, and writer Donna Franceschild works miracles. The series is also notable for an early role for a young fella called David Tennant as manic-depressive Campbell, who becomes McKenna’s enthusiastic sidekick in his battle to keep the station on air. A breathtaking piece of television genius.

Olympics 2008: Closing Ceremony (Sunday 12 noon, BBC1)

Oh god, Boris Johnson is out in Beijing to accept the flag in the handover to London for the 2012 games. Be afraid, be very afraid. Still, the closing ceremony should be a good bun fight if the opening ceremony was anything to go by - just watch out for the lip-synching…

Last of the Summer Wine (Sunday 7.05pm, BBC1)

A nostalgic episode of the sitcom that bravely soldiers on, seeing Clegg and Truly cast their minds back to old friend Compo and the scrapes he used to get into. I still have a great fondness for this old warhorse - I loved it as a kid, and this serves as a nice little tribute to the late Bill Owen who passed way in 1999.

Spooks: Code 9 (Sunday 9pm, BBC3)

London destroyed blah blah… new breed of terrorists blah blah… younger MI5 operatives blah blah… mole in the team blah blah… new world blah blah… new rules blah blah… When are Harry and Adam coming back, please and thank you?

Dexter (Sunday 10pm, FX)

Now if you want edgy, stylish drama but with grown ups on a Sunday night, then look no further than the wonderful Dexter, the second season of which is proving just as tense and exciting as season one, if not more so. Every episode appears to be taking our eponymous serial killer hero a step closer to being unmasked, and as we hit the final third of this second series, who knows where it could go? To a third season, that’s where…

Masterchef: the Professionals (Monday 6.30pm, BBC2)

Saints be praised, a new spin on the Masterchef format that sees Gregg Wallace preside over the trials of a group of young professional chefs who want to take their cooking to the next level. There are no enthusiastic amateurs here, no ill-considered chocolate fondants, and no waspish observations from John Torode. What?! No Torode? Sadly not, although we’re fairly sure he’ll be back for the common or garden Masterchef next year. Gregg’s co-judge for this competition that runs Monday to Friday, is the revered chef Michelle Roux Jr. Will this competition just get tougher? Probably…

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

Final episode of what has proved to be an excellent fifth series for the veteran coppers. The team are up against MI5 spooks and the MoD when they investigate the death of a soldier that may have links to a secret army medical lab. It’s as pithy as always and a great finale to the series, but rest assured, the team will return in a sixth series in the not too distant.

The Last Word Monologues (Monday 10.35pm, BBC1)

First in a three part series of monologues written, produced and directed by Hugo Blick. Sheila Hancock stars in this first piece as a terminally ill woman who prepares for a final conversation with her husband before she takes the path of euthanasia. It’s not quite as powerful as it could be, lacking the depth and honesty of Alan Bennett’s Talking Heads, but it’s still an engaging piece with a great performer. The series continues on Tuesday and Wednesday with monologues from Rhys Ifans and Bob Hoskins.

So QI, the quirky panel game hosted by Stephen Fry, is set to move from BBC2 to BBC1 is it? Can I ask who thought this was a good idea, because frankly, it isn’t, far from it.

Why does the BBC’s premier channel insist on cherry picking the best shows from it’s more specialist channels like some bully who gets the class swot to do his homework and then give it to the teacher as their own work? I admit that this has worked in some cases - The Apprentice is a case in point and has been even more successful following the move from BBC2. But I argue that The Apprentice as a format is right for BBC1, and should probably have been on that channel from the start. But QI just isn’t a BBC1 one show, and I don’t see how it can be.

So the BBC Entertainment division has announced it has commissioned Initial Television to produce a new game show, Wipeout. Which now means I’ve got the Beach Boys song running round my head. Thanks, BBC.

Initially, I did wonder if the BBC were bringing back one of its back catalogue of gameshows from the early 1990s, hosted by Paul Daniels (see this video) and, in its later daytime years, Bob Monkhouse.

But no. Oh no, this Wipeout is very different indeed. A preview from the American version is available after the jump…

As you may have read in our main news section, I’d Do Anything winner Jodie Prenger is to make her West End debut next week. But not in Oliver!, which does not start previews until December. Instead, she is to join the ensemble cast of Les Miserables at the Queen’s Theatre for a three or four-week run.

Unlike Connie Fisher and Lee Mead, who were both thrown into breakneck-speed rehearsals before their respective West End shows opened within weeks of their BBC talent show wins, Jodie has had several months in between conquering the public vote and her opening night. In the meantime, she’s also gone on a summer school course at RADA, while also occasionally performing — this coming Bank Holiday weekend, she’ll be at Bryn Terfel’s Faenol Festival with John Barrowman and fellow talent show alum Daniel Boys, currently going great guns in Avenue Q.

It seems to me that both the RADA course and this move are absolutely the right move for Jodie, as they would be for any actor in her situation. If she’d had the few weeks’ rehearsal time that Connie and Lee were given, I’ve no doubt she would have been able to rise to the challenge more than effectively. But given the six-month gap between winning and first night, it’s good to see her use the time to ensure that her first performance in a leading role on the West End stage is as good as it possibly can be.

Talking recently to some ardent fans of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, that popular old warhorse of CBS’s schedules in the US and Five here in Blightly, they were definitely of the opinion that the show has come dangerously close to “jumping the shark”. In fact, one acquaintance complained that in a recent episode, characters were discussing the very concept of jumping the shark, which he considered dangerous in a drama that was sailing very close to the wind in that regard, grumbling something about: “Be careful what you wish for”.

But is there a ray of hope on the horizon for the original incarnation of the expansive franchise, that also has CSI: Miami and CSI: New York in its stable? Certainly the announcement that Oscar-nominated actor Laurence Fishburne is to take the lead in the Las Vegas based show once William Petersen (aka Gil Grissom) departs partway through the next series, appears to have been met positively.

It seems anything can be turned into a game and/or reality show these days. Singing in a choir? Check - Last Choir Standing is currently dovetailing with The X Factor on Saturday nights. Cabin crew? Check - CelebAir is coming soon as part of ITV2’s new season.

The BBC has recently been expanding into other areas, with Maestro going down really well on Tuesday nights on BBC2. That’s due in part to the judging process being in the hands of professionals rather than the great unwashed and their premium phone lines. Hopefully, it’ll also be true of the latest venture, which sees the Corporation’s Entertainment division team up with the world-renowned Natural History Unit.

To the Ends of the Earth will, apparently, follow eight wannabe natural history film-makers as they compete for a place at the prestigious NHU.

The candidates have to track down and film extraordinary animals in extraordinary places. Each week they will face ever tougher physical, mental and emotional challenges.

They will be judged on what footage they get and, just as importantly, how they get it.

I wonder — will it be allowed to fake footage of foxes in the rain, or not?

You can tell that Autumn’s coming, as the channels start trumpeting their new shows. And it seems that every year there’s at least one channel that also takes the opportunity to rebrand — or at the very least give their existing one a little makeover.

This year, it seems, is ITV2’s turn. The channel’s existing logo has been given a 3D look which will probably come across better on screen than it does on the web. The ITV2 website itself has also been reworked, now working as a Netvibes-powered collection of widgets and gizmos. Visitors are encouraged to add their own widgets to the page, so in theory you can check your email or your Facebook status from the same page. Which is fine, but as far as I can see it’s the wrong way round — ITV should be putting its information out in a way where I can add it to my portal of choice, whether it’s my Facebook page, my iGoogle home page, or whatever. To its credit, ITV is also moving in this direction, with its Flickr streams and Twitter feeds — but you wouldn’t necessarily know that from the ITV2 homepage.

But even in these days of online interactivity, the broadcast channel is still where it’s at. And on the strength of the videos ITV2 have released as part of the launch, I think they’re getting it right. See what I mean after the jump.

ITV has unveiled a brand new variety show for its autumn schedule, with series producer Glen Middleham insisting that the traditional entertainment format can still appeal to a modern TV audience.

Scheduled for a prime time weekend slot, For One Night Only will consist of three 60-minute live shows and one pre-recorded Christmas special, each with a fully professional line-up featuring comedians, West End performers and international singing stars.

The show is the first series using a variety format to be commissioned for such a high-profile slot in some years, but Middleham is confident that audiences are ready for a programme that will be “traditional but glossy”.

“It’s all about how we present it to the audience, so they feel like they are getting something fresh and exciting, when really some of the acts have their roots in times long gone,” he told The Stage. “I don’t think you can ever deny the fact that variety has been going since year dot, so the new show is all about clever casting and the juxtaposition of different acts on the bill. It is also about collaborations people would not necessarily see elsewhere.”

He added: “It is to do with how we present it. I have a very ambitious set that gives a nod to old variety, but is also very modern and slick.

“It gives the show a modern edge, whilst not turning our back on what variety is.” That ITV should be leading the way in launching a new variety show for television is no surprise given its entertainment heritage.

Indeed, it was current executive chairman Michael Grade’s uncle, Lew Grade, who established ITV hits such as Sunday Night at the London Palladium, which ran on the channel from 1955-67.

June 2008: The Stage exclusively reports that Suranne Jones is to play an ex-convict in a new Sally Wainwright drama for ITV1, to be produced by Red Production Company.

August 2008: Stories from Digital Spy, Metro, C21.

How nice of them to keep up! :-)

If you want to be truly up-to-date in your broadcasting news, remember to keep The Stage at the top of your reading list.

It’s horribly compulsive watching, even if at times it does seem to be on a par with a daytrip to Bedlam to point and laugh. Yes, The X Factor is back, and we have weeks of audition shows left before the competition proper gets underway.

Watching last week’s show, though, it struck me that there is something to be learnt from the show, even (or especially) when some of the acts who don’t have a chance are on screen.

And so, in the grand TV Today tradition of starting semi-regular features that end up appearing only once, here we bring you 10 things we learnt from… The X Factor.

Audition tip 1: Know what to expect

Let’s face it, this is the fifth series of The X Factor. You’d think by now that people would have worked out what’s in store for them, but every year we get stories about contestants who feel they’ve been treated badly by Simon and his fellow judges. It’s become quite clear that the acts who get the most success out of the process are the sort of acts that pop impresarios like Simon Cowell know how to package.

You should always go into an audition knowing exactly what to expect. For most jobs it’ll be more about the job at the end of the process, but you should also be clear what is required of you.

Audition tip 2: Have an appropriate audition piece prepared

R’n’B vocal harmony group JLS did the right thing, choosing a song and arrangement that showcased each band member’s talents, as well as illustrating how they worked together. Whether you’re doing a singing audition or an acting one, your choice of material should put you and your abilities in the best possible light.

Also make sure your material is appropriate: if you’re up for a part in a Ray Cooney farce, you wouldn’t audition with a soliloquy from Hamlet. An audition for a part in a chart-based boyband or girl group isn’t going to go well if you go in with your favourite show tune, with all jazz hands blazing.

It’s like Vordermangate over at Coronation Street at the moment it seems, with veteran cobble-walkers having their six-figure salaries slashed, and being paid on a by scene basis…

This began a few weeks ago when it broke in the papers that queen of the mini-skirt, Beverley Callard (Liz McDonald) was taking a salary cut and being paid per episode, which could lose her a reported £50,000 per year. And now the Sunday Mirror has reported that some of the longest serving talent on Coronation Street will be now be employed on a play and pay basis. According to the paper, this august list includes Malcolm Hebden (Norris), Betty Driver (Betty), Barbara Knox (Rita) and, William Roach aside, the soap’s longest serving performer, Eileen Derbyshire (Emily).

Some of these actors reportedly earn up to £250,000 a year, and it is believed this new system of pay will seriously reduce their pay packets, with a supposed ITV insider saying:

The Hairy Bakers (Monday 8.30pm, BBC2)

And with one quick change of a vowel, The Hairy Bikers find a new lease of life as The Hairy Bakers, riding around Great Britain in search of the best baking the country has to offer. This week the lads are looking at bread, and there are some great recipes on offer. That’s the main problem with this format, the food is fantastic, but the banter between the lads becomes wearing after a few minutes, especially Si King who I dearly wish would just SHUT UP and cook!

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

A veritable oasis after a tedious weekend of telly, New Tricks can always be relied upon to deliver the goods on a Monday evening. The team are drawn into the lives of a commune that appears to be at the centre of their most recent investigation. This gives Brian some solace from his usual demons and problems and the always-welcome chance for Alun Armstrong to demonstrate that he’s the best thing in New Tricks. Watch out for guest turns from Lorcan Cranitch and Sylvia Simms.

Crime Thriller Season (Monday 9pm, ITV3)

Tying in to this year’s Crime Thriller Awards, ITV3 commences a season showcasing some of the best detective drama put out by the broadcaster, starting with Ian Rankin, creator of the enduring Inspector Rebus series of novels (and one of my favourite writers). The author talks about his career, his love of Edinburgh and his famous creation. Following this interesting profile you can catch a repeat of The Falls, the first TV outing for Ken Stott as Rebus.

Liverpool on the Box (Tuesday 8pm, BBC4)

As part of the Liverpool season, this clip show charts the high and lows of the city as depicted on our TV screens, with usual suspects Boys from the Blackstuff, Brookside and Bread mixing in with segments from Z Cars. Nicely nostalgic and one for the TV history buffs.

Maestro (Tuesday 9pm, BBC2)

This engaging reality show continues as the celebrities crack on with the quest to conduct the BBC concert orchestra at the Proms. This week, the remaining hopefuls must endure a live performance at Television Centre to see if they have what it takes to go the distance. Good stuff.

Call the Cops (Tuesday 10pm, BBC4)

Sticking with BBC4 for more TV history, this documentary series continues with a look at the legendary and long-running Z Cars. It’s a show that everybody knows, but is little-repeated, and cast members James Ellis and Brian Blessed, amongst others, recall their time with this pioneering series. As the BBC cast about for a successful police procedural series after the death of Holby Blue, it surprises me that some bright executive hasn’t toyed with the idea of bringing back the show.

Trawlermen (Wednesday 8.30pm, BBC1)

It’s basically Deadliest Catch in all but name, but the BBC spin on the Discovery Channel hit is no less compelling or watchable. The Peterhead trawlermen head out into treacherous conditions to bring home a haul of fish that will put money on the table for their family. It’s a thankless task, but these guys put their lives on the line with good humour and tenacity that makes you think twice about your cod and chips on a Saturday night. Not that we should be eating cod, mind.

Who Do You Think You Are? (Wednesday 9pm, BBC1)

Considering tonight’s subject is Boris Johnson, I think this is a question many people would rather like answered.

House of Saddam (Wednesday 9pm, BBC2)

Gripping conclusion to a truly magnificent drama documenting the true story of the rise and fall of Saddam Hussein. There’s a more reflective air to this closing segment, with Saddam a fugitive in his own country, hiding out from coalition forces. He’s a broken man and this is a stark contrast to the proud and powerful creature we have seen throughout this series. And then you remember that the whole thing really happened, and that snaps you back to reality. Sobering.

Harley Street (Thursday 9pm, ITV1)

Back in 1998, when legendary sitcom Seinfeld came to an end in America, the nation vibrated under an onslaught of anguished cries from the populace. I anticipate much the same reaction in the UK when Harley Street heaves to an end on Thursday. Never more Suranne Jones’s plum-in-the-gob accent, ta-ra to the nice coats, and bye bye dialogue that would make the script editor of Bonekickers blush (still can’t resist having a dig at Bonekickers…)

The Cup (Thursday 9.30pm, BBC2)

A promising new comedy in that mockumentary style that’s so difficult to get right - this succeeds to an extent, but I’m not sure if it can sustain six episodes, but we’ll see how it goes. Steve Edge is obsessive dad Terry, whose son plays in a junior footie team that the documentary team is following. Much of the comedy revolves round competitive parents, and I get the feeling that is going to wear thin, but on the whole, this first outing for The Cup more or less succeeds.

It was a nice touch to hear Paul Jackson, ITV’s Director of Entertainment and Comedy, open the press launch for series 5 of The X Factor with a tribute to his mentor, the late Bill Cotton, although I suspect that the reference went over the heads of the assembled hordes of celebrity magazine journalists in attendance.

I wouldn’t like to guess how Sir Bill would have felt about The X Factor, a programme which, for the first few weeks of programmes, delights in finding as much entertainment value in humiliating members of the public as in uncovering new singing talent from the unlikeliest of people. Still, there’s no denying its unrelenting popularity, and this year it’s back and bigger than ever.

The on-screen captions tell us that 180,000 applied this year — although Jackson told us that ‘just under 100,000’ auditionees were seen at the initial production level, implying that nearly half of all applicants don’t even make it to that first, unseen, stage. To emphasise how much bigger it is, we’re shown sweeping crane shots of football stadia and concert arenas packed to the gunnels with wannabes.

And the bombast just keeps on coming.

The Tudors (Friday 9pm, BBC2)

Somebody’s playing the assassination game in tonight’s tale of everyday Tudor folk as they take a pot shot at Anne Boleyn. Poor Anne, nobody seems to like the girl, from the British public to the Pope (a fabulous Peter O’Toole). And Henry is sure to go off her pretty soon, even though she’s pregnant and all around are hoping for a bouncing baby boy… One feels there might be disappointment on the way. History has to play a small part in the narrative somewhere along the way. Doesn’t it?

Comedy Connections (Friday 10.35pm, BBC1)

Lifting the lid on another classic comedy. This week the long-running Rab C Nesbitt gets the connection treatment, full of the usual talking head interviews, revealing stories and clips galore. It’s not one of my favourite comedies ever (I prefer Still Game), but its place in the annals of comedy history are assured - there’s even a very early appearance from a young David Tennant in there somewhere…

The X Factor

It’s that time of year when The X Factor returns and the mammoth slog to Christmas begins in earnest. Of course there are well-publicised changes this year - Sharon is out, to be replaced Girls Aloud pop starlet Cheryl Cole (and you won’t find any complaints from me on that score). Also, over on The Xtra Factor on ITV2 straight after the main show, Holly Willoughby takes over from Fearne Cotton. Oh well, we can’t have everything. No doubt Louis will quit halfway through the run, only to be persuaded to come back by Simon in a flurry of tabloid scuttlebutt, but by now, it’s all just part of the fun. As always we start off with the heats, commencing in Manchester. Let the fun begin! (And come back to TV Today tomorrow for our review — Ed.)

Sleepers (Saturday 8pm, BBC4)

A shining beacon in a dull Saturday evening schedule (The X Factor aside), this frothy comedy thriller from the early 90s concludes. Our lovable Russian spies, played consummately by Warren Clarke and Nigel Havers, evade the covert forces of both the KGB and MI5 in a madcap chase around Britain. Hugely enjoyable and highly recommended. They don’t make ‘em like they used to. Instead, they make Bonekickers.

Dad’s Army (Saturday 8.30pm, BBC2)

Classic comedy to brighten up your Saturday in the company of the Walmington-on-Sea Home Guard. The residents of the town are no longer taking the threat of invasion seriously, so Captain Mainwaring engineers a plot for the platoon to pose as fifth columnists to teach them a lesson. Inspired and still brilliant.

Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? (Saturday 8.30pm, ITV1)

First in a new run of the perennial gameshow, only worth recommending as it’s a celebrity special featuring castmembers from Coronation Street. Does anybody know when Casualty is back?

Midsomer Murders (Sunday 8pm, ITV1)

You know that when an actor with the stature of Joss Ackland turns up in Midsomer Murders that he’s unlikely to make it to the first ad break… and so it as Sir Freddy Butler dies of a supposed heart attack. But then the will goes missing and his lawyer meets a hot and sticky end, so it isn’t long before Barnaby and Jones come running. Always fun in a gentle kind of way

Britain From Above (Sunday 9pm, BBC1)

A lovely show based on a simple premise - let’s have a look at the landscape of Britain from a great height. As I noted last week, it’s all very pretty, but I do wonder why it’s on at 9pm. Surely an earlier slot would allow some younger viewers to watch as its hardly offensive stuff - unless Andrew Marr is deemed too scary for a pre-watershed slot.

Spooks: Code 9 (Sunday 9pm, BBC3)

Well, thank goodness for some new drama, but a shame it’s the drearily incomprehensible Spooks: Code 9. The problem I have with the whole concept is BBC3’s desperate need to court a younger audience, crow-barring the embarrassing Maguffin that terrorists are getting younger, so it stands to reason that spies have to. Eh? This series lost me in episode one when Joanne Froggatt took a bullet. The regular cast, Georgia Moffett aside who acts her colleagues off the screen, are painfully dull and all look cloned from the same cardigan. I still think the series needs Peter Firth as Harry Pearce, chewing the scenery in grand style, to give things some context - couldn’t he have been on holiday when the bomb went off?

Terry McConnell is not happy about how he comes across on screen. “The BBC sent me a letter,” he says. “Balanced and fair, it says… nowhere does it say ‘Terry’, ‘gets’ and the word ‘kicking’… I know how the Queen felt, when they filmed her going backwards and they reversed it to look like she was going forwards.”

So he’s using YouTube to put his side:

Of course, this is all publicity for BBC2’s new mockumentary comedy, The Cup, which starts next Thursday. While the BBC have been putting preview clips on YouTube for some time, it’s a nice bit of marketing to try and package a clip that fits into YouTube’s general home-made ethos.

It’s the story that just refused to go away, and eighteen months after the world went crazy when three misguided girls decided to be rather unpleasant about a glamorous Bollywood star, the Celebrity Big Brother race row is back. Word on the reality street is that Jade Goody, generally perceived as the ring leader in alleged racist bullying of actress Shilpa Shetty, is all set to take part in an Indian spin on the Big Brother format - Big Boss - and is preparing to fly to India this weekend for a rumoured £100, 000 fee. The irony of this arrangement? Shetty is the host of Big Boss.

Hilarious…

I’m not sure if there’s much of a story here - it’s either a really bad idea, or it’ll pass by like a summer cloud. A source has told the press:

“She was really upset about everything that happened after the scandal last year. She really wants to clear her name and prove to everyone that she’s not a racist.”

To which the only response is to roll my eyes wearily. Clear her name? I rather think Goody will be focusing on the paycheck… Still, her first encounter with Shetty will no doubt make front-page news here. Sigh.

I can completely empathise with the gentleman at the start of this clip — I just hope the consequences are unique to him:

The video above is a preview of The Wrong Door, a forthcoming BBC3 sketch show.

According to the blurb, it’s set in a “parallel universe - a fantastic world governed by the laws of comedy (not nature), where special effects seen in the movies and on TV are part of everyday life.

“In this world herds of space hoppers and shopping trolleys roam the countryside; robots play tennis; mini-bars come with a helpful mini-barman; magazines come with a free, blow-up boyfriend; and MP3 players generate 3-D popstar holograms and monsters under the bed.”

Featuring a company cast along with celebrity cameos, The Wrong Door is a BBC Vision production, written by Jack Cheshire and Ben Wheatley. It is directed by Ben Wheatley and produced by Jack Cheshire, head of the New Comedy Unit at the BBC. Executive Producer is Jon Rolph.

That’s what variety is supposed to be, and Peter Fincham is hoping that its return to Saturday nights will help the fortunes of ITV1 as his first autumn season as controller of programmes was unveiled today.

For One Night Only (which if you ask me is a silly title, seeing as it’ll be on next week… and the next… and the next… You can see where I’m going with this) will form a lynchpin in the Saturday night schedule and will be a:

“modern variety show that combines exciting hosts with top-quality comedy, dazzling specialty acts and massive music stars”

the broadcaster has said today. So that’ll be Denise Van Outen, Joe Pasquale, somebody playing A-Ha’s Take On Me with their hands and the Cheeky Girls. Probably. Cynic? Moi?

I was initially prepared to get quite uppity about Sir Terry Wogan’s somewhat negative comments about the BBC in an interview to commemorate the legendary broadcaster’s 70th birthday. The old Togmeister is of the opinion that Auntie is not quite the establishment it used to be, telling the Radio Times:

“When I started, people who worked for the BBC knew they weren’t earning as much as people in commercial television, but they did have the satisfaction of knowing that they worked for one of the finest, if not the finest, broadcasting organisation in the whole world. I’m not sure they feel that any more, or at least that it means as much as it used to”

“How dare he!” I thought as I read that this morning, but you know what? He’s probably right. And I don’t think Sir Terry’s comments are as inflammatory as the media at large has, in typical style, painted the quotes to be. I rather think these are the musings of a highly experienced broadcaster who is basically trying to say: it’s not like the old days.

If anybody’s earned the right to have his say, it’s Wogan.

And to follow up on Scott’s earlier posting about the sad death of Sir Bill Cotton, I rather think that Cotton was perhaps one of the greatest embodiments of just what it was to work at the BBC in the old days, the days that Wogan misses so much. Cotton’s genial, gentlemanly air that commanded the respect of his peers and rivals, combined with the ability to spot major talent has been sadly missing from the BBC for years, and is now sadly missing from the world. Cotton understood television. So few do these days.

Sir Bill Cotton, TV Today salutes you.

The passing of former Managing Director of BBC Television, Sir Bill Cotton, is a sad day in the history of British television.

The son of famous band leader Billy Cotton, Bill Jr worked in live light entertainment before joining the Corporation in January 1956. As The Stage’s interview with Cotton in 2000 following his retirement highlights, his early successes included spotting talents such as Tommy Steele and Russ Conway, who went on to become enormous successes.

Cotton’s tenure within BBC Light Entertainment can truly be seen as a golden age, one which Cotton even then recognised would not come again. When asked if he had the best of BBC television, he answered:

I think we have had the best of any television. There was fierce competition between the BBC and ITV, but in those days it was programmes first and money afterwards.

I used to say to the Americans that the difference between our system and yours is hat you make programmes to make money, and we get money to make programmes. But of course, all that has changed now.

Over at BBC News, Bruce Forsyth reminisces about Bill.

Ten years ago in 1998, BBC Radio 2 marked Cotton’s 70th birthday with Double Bill, a series reminisicing about both Bill’s career and that of his bandleader father. From The Stage archives, read Cotton’s interview with Lisa Martand.

• Access to these articles from The Stage archive is free. To access archive content from The Stage vaults dating back to our first issue in 1880, visit http://archive.thestage.co.uk/. Timed access costs £5 for one day, £15 for a week or £30 for a month.

EastEnders (Monday 8pm, BBC1)

An emotional episode of EastEnders that sees a brief return for John Bardon as Jim Branning, his first appearance in the soap following a stroke last year. It’s perhaps made even sadder by the news that Bardon has been back in hospital recently. We wish the actor well for a speedy recovery and hope that Jim will be back in Albert Square again very soon.

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

In tonight’s episode of this Square Eyes favourite, the spotlight is on Alun Armstrong’s Brian as the team get involved with the reopening of a case that involved a wife being acquitted of offing her husband after being hypnotised. It’s great as always, and the dialogue is razor sharp - something I’m finding increasingly rare in modern drama (see Bonekickers and Harley Street).

Ian Rankin’s Hidden Edinburgh (Monday 11.20pm BBC2)

Previously shown on BBC4, this documentary, being shown to tie in with the paperback release Ian Rankin’s latest (and final) Inspector Rebus novel, has the author escorting us around various Edinburgh locations. Rankin is an engaging guide, and this serves as a nice backdrop to the range of best-selling novels.

Coming Up: Lickle Bill Um (Monday 11.40pm, C4)

Nice to see Channel 4 commissioning some e new dramas from emerging talent, but dismaying to see them tucked away in a late slot. This season of Coming Up dramas ties in to the current Generation Next season, and is written and directed by Kate Hardie. It features Amanda Abbington as a daughter who hires two kidnappers to abduct her overbearing mother. More of this please, but at a time when more people will see it.

Bonekickers (Tuesday 9pm, BBC1)

It’s the final episode of Bonekickers, and I admit I’m going to miss this genial mess of a drama. It has livened up my Tuesday evenings no end with its improbable plots, terrible dialogue and outrageously ham-fisted performances. And tonight they’ve saved the best for last as a round table is uncovered at the base of Glastonbury Tor. How very remiss of King Arthur to leave it there for anybody to stumble upon. The episode features a guest-turn from Dexter Fletcher, who clearly will be running straight back to Hotel Babylon very quickly for better scripts and dialogue. And yes, I meant that with no irony whatsoever.

Maestro (Tuesday 9pm, BBC2)

A fantastically entertaining piece of reality fluff that’s sees a group of celebrities take on the challenge of conducting the BBC Concert Orchestra. You might not think that would be make for riveting TV, but it’s a beguiling concept, and the celebs on hand go through tears, laughter and lots of dropped notes in their quest to win the prize of conducting at a Prom. Clive Anderson hosts and among the celebrities we have Katy Derham, Sue Perkins, Jane Asher, Bradley Walsh and the legendary David Soul. Can I put in a request for him to slide over a piano in true Starsky and Hutch stylee, please?

How Not to Live Your Life (Tuesday 10.20pm, BBC3)

A promising new sit-com from BBC3 that, while not wildly funny, is certainly not an embarrassing mess. Don navigates his way through life with not much success, careering from one catastrophe to another, peppered with fantasy sequences from our hapless anti-hero’s mind. It’s fast enough for any weaknesses not to really get noticed, but how long will that last? This one could go either way.

Who Do You Think You Are? (Wednesday 9pm, BBC1)

The return of a reliable BBC ratings banker that opens with Holby City’s Patsy Kensit having a shufty through her family history. The emotion is laid on thicker than usual in this edition as Pats, almost reluctantly, delves into some murky issues over her family’s involvement with various infamous gangster dynasties of yesteryear. It’s still a fascinating watch, and, despite the overflow of tears, you can’t help but feel for the girl a bit.

House of Saddam (Wednesday, 9pm, BBC2)

This truly gripping drama reaches 1995 and the backdrop of economic ruin for Iraq in the face of sanctions and the snooping of weapons inspectors. Saddam’s son, Uday, is becoming increasingly unhinged, which forces Hussein, Saddam’s most trusted adviser, to take drastic measures. But Uday’s actions are nothing to some of the things his dad is up to… It’s a compelling watch, and highly disturbing in places.

EastEnders (Thursday 7.30pm, BBC1)

A solemn occasion on EastEnders as Wellard goes to the big soap dog kennel in the sky. I like to think he’ll be gambolling round a big field in the sunshine with Roly and Little Willie…

Harley Street (Thursday 9pm, ITV1)

Bonekickers might be finishing this week, but there’s still one more episode of Harley Street to go - enjoy this joyous piece of work while it lasts as I doubt we’ll be seeing it back. I’m amazed at the quality of guest-stars this show has managed to attract, with James Fleet popping up tonight. I’m assuming he needs a new kitchen or something…

I’ve had an unusually busy couple of weeks in various TV-influenced areas of entertainment. Rattling through them in order of decreasing levels of televisual interest, I was privileged to be invited to the first live week of Last Choir Standing.

I’ve always found choral singing to a be a joyous experience, and despite the acoustics in TC1 at Television Centre being renowned for not favouring singers, the effect of a massed 175-strong choir was phenomenal. Whether blasting out the uptempo Blues Brothers clasic Everybody Needs Somebody or the more contemplative Bridge over Troubled Water, the wall of sound was breathtaking.

The Tudors (Friday 9pm, BBC1)

There’s something utterly joyous about The Tudors, isn’t there? It’s trashy and historically inaccurate, of course, but that’s hardly an original criticism of this show, so it’s best to just look the other way. Tonight there’s a Christmas present for Henry from the wonderfully pouty Anne Boleyn, but the King is busy trying to make his marriage to Catherine of Aragorn a thing of the past, which naturally Thomas More isn’t happy about (on behalf of God).

Comedy Connections (Friday 10.35pm, BBC1)

I must admit, I didn’t really get Ripping Yarns, but realise I’m probably alone in this stance among discerning comedy fans. But one can’t deny that, of all the shows covered by Comedy Connections, Ripping Yarns is perhaps the best connected of the lot, featuring as it does comedy royalty Michael Palin lampooning the classic era of boys’ own adventure tales. Amidst the clips, Palin fondly recalls the show, and there are also contributions from the likes of fellow-Python Terry Jones, who popped up in an episode.

The Great Wall of China (Saturday 7pm, Channel 4)

As the Olympics gets underway in Beijing, this docu-drama looks at the construction of The Great Wall of China and the minds behind its construction. Fascinating stuff, this is told from the point of view of a lowly soldier, an engineer and the young Chinese emperor of the day. While great feats are being performed in the name of sports in the present, gaze upon a great feat of the past.

Sleepers (Saturday 8pm, BBC4)

A little repeated drama from 1991 starring Nigel Havers and Warren Clarke as two Russian sleeper agents who are installed in Britain, where they blend in and wait for the call to serve their country and spy on the Brits. Problem is, when that call doesn’t come for 25 years, you might get a bit comfortable with the Rule Brittania life and not be too keen to start snooping, and that’s exactly what happens. Enjoyable and sweet, Havers and Clarke are brilliant, and with a supporting cast that includes David Calder, quality is assured. Now, if BBC4 can get round to repeating Taking Over the Asylum and Tutti Frutti, that would be great.

Casualty (Saturday 8.50pm, BBC1)

It’s the conclusion of a tense two-parter that sees Maggie up in court and fighting for her future. There might also be some medical stuff alongside somewhere - this is Casualty after all. After going through a good patch about a year ago, Casualty has returned to its dreary, mundane default. And to say that this is the top-rated and best show on a Saturday night is about as depressing as it gets. Hey ho.

The West Wing (Saturday 11.50pm, More4)

The West Wing meets Sesame Street? That’s got to be worth an hour of somebody’s time!

Britain from Above (Sunday 9pm, BBC1)

Lots of nice pictures of Britain from, erm… above. Pretty but ultimately pointless (obviously I’m not talking about presenter Andrew Marr…)

Spooks: Code 9 (Sunday 9pm, BBC3)

Perhaps the most incomprehensible spin-off from a TV series ever that actually ends up not really being a spin-off at all, so I don’t quite get the point of giving it the Spooks moniker. It’s 2013 and London, including the MI5 HQ Thames House, has been destroyed in a nuclear attack, and for some reason this means that the only people who can take on the terrorist threat are young people. Erm… just because, it seems. I just don’t get it - it’s like somebody set out to make The Sarah Jane Adventures and ended up with the first season of Torchwood. There’s a good cast populating this double-bill opener, including Joanne Frogatt and Georgia Moffett, but really, what’s the point?

After my somewhat negative missive yesterday on the current fortunes of ITV and the channel’s seeming inability to generate interesting, appealing new comedy and drama, I’m pleased to see that the second series of Moving Wallpaper seems to be shaping up nicely, and for this we can be thankful.

I liked Moving Wallpaper a lot - it was pithy, well-written and well acted, and gave us one of the best comedy creations of recent years in Ben Miller’s archly-acid TV producer Jonathan Pope. And the notion of transmitting Echo Beach, the soap within Moving Wallpaper, as a show in its own right was a boldly out of character experiment for ITV. Fair enough, it didn’t quite work, but in the commercial sector, taking a punt on something like that has to be celebrated.

As we know from various press reports and the official press release from ITV, Echo Beach will not be returning, either as a series in its own right or as an element within Moving Wallpaper. The last series of Moving Wallpaper ended on a cliff-hanger as Pope and his production team awaited the fate of the soap… and the news isn’t good.

I find it difficult to raise much more than a weary eyebrow at today’s run down of ITV’s interim financial results for the first six months of 2008. I mean, it’s hardly a surprise is it? Credit crunch, blah blah, economic slow down, blah blah, falling ad revenues, blah blah… Tell us something we don’t know. I’m not surprised, and I’m sure Michael Grade and his ITV colleagues aren’t surprised either.

In fact, much of Grade’s comments over the company’s performance are starting to sound as weary as I feel about the whole thing.

“Almost a year into the turnaround strategy, we have made considerable operational progress. With more viewers watching ITV programmes, we are delivering greater value for advertisers.”

he droned from the ITV hymn sheet this morning in the wake of the announcement. Yes, there may have been a negligible spike in ITV’s audience share, but personally I’m looking to the impact of the ratings rollercoaster Britain’s Got Talent as the tool that brought that about. Elsewhere, the ratings are flat and fairly dismal, unless you happen to be old favourites like Coronation Street and Heartbeat, although there was a reasonable figure for Marple last Sunday.

I see Adrian Lester is looking to the future with a hopeful eye on a second series of Bonekickers. Well there are three words I never thought I’d see in the same sentence - second, series and Bonekickers. Sorry, sorry, sorry, but if I see such tempting fish in a barrel, I just have to shoot.

But looking at Lester’s gamely enthusiastic stance on his current role for Auntie Beeb - and to be fair, I wouldn’t expect him to be anything less, being the pro that he is - I do wonder as to how series creators Ashley Pharoah and Matthew Graham sold the show to the actor…

“The great thing about Bonekickers is that it could go anywhere.”

Lester recently enthused, as reported by the Mirror.

Um…

Coronation Street (Monday 7.30/8.30pm, ITV1)

This is like one of the vintage episodes of 1970s Corrie that would routinely send Bet Lynch and a mis-matched travelling companion like Rita off in a camper van for a couple of days… with hilarious consequences. Packing Audrey Roberts and Bill Webster off on a booze cruise with Janice Battersby has disaster written all over, as Audrey is the only member of the party capable of driving back to Weaherfield after much alcohol has been imbibed. I like a soap that still finds time to embrace its fun side, but will there be more serious consequences for the haughty hairdresser?

The Genius of Charles Darwin (Monday 8pm, C4)

Ooh, this is likely to be a contentious piece of work as Richard Dawkins delves into the work of Charles Darwin 150 years after he attempted to educate the world on this new-fangled notion called “evolution”. Dawkins is a tricksy commentator and gets people’s danders up no end - you should see what the Doctor Who fans are saying about him following his appearance at the end of the last series (ironic, considering he’s married to an ex-Who girl Lalla Ward). But this is an engaging documentary that does what the best television should do - gets you thinking. Whatever your opinion of Dawkins, he always gets a reaction.

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

Family history comes back to haunt Pullman in tonight’s episode of the reliable drama series when the team reopen an investigation that was handled by a corrupt colleague of her father’s. Are there more familial skeletons waiting in cupboards?

Dr Alice Roberts: Don’t Die Young (Tuesday 8pm, BBC2)

A double-bill of bodily investigations with the likeable and engaging Dr Alice Roberts that’s as fascinating as it is quease-inducing. In this pair of episodes, the liver comes under Roberts’s piercing gaze, followed by the stomach and intestines. Nice! It’s an uncomfortable watch, but Roberts is so watchable and enthusiastic it hardly seems to matter. But then, I think I have a crush on her, so I’d probably watch Doc Roberts read the phone book to be honest.

Bonekickers (Tuesday 9pm, BBC1)

I had a shock at the weekend - a visit home and a trawl through my parents’ Sky+ habits revealed a worrying liking for Bonekickers. After getting over the shock and deleting all traces of the offending programme, I told my father the error of his ways and the subject was closed. But perhaps I’ve missed something about this show, some hitherto hidden element that’s alluring to a certain strata of the audience. Or perhaps I’m being too generous. I think there are good stories buried very deep beneath the ham-fisted execution, but however much I try, I simply cannot engage with Bonekickers. Tonight’s exciting unearthing revolves around the discovery of a First World War tank and the bodies of six soldiers within.

House of Saddam (Wednesday 9pm, BBC2)

This cracking piece of drama continues as we get to 1988 in the life, loves and wars of Saddam Hussein. Following the war with Iran, Iraq is on the brink of bankruptcy, but there is a celebratory air around the capital. The world events anchor House of Saddam to historical context, but the compelling moments in this mesmerising piece take place around the chicanery of the family dynasty. That’s where the real drama is to be had.

Doctor Who (Wednesday 7pm, BBC3)

After the hoo-ha of Doctor Who’s season finale that left the sci-fi adventure as popular and loved as ever, go back to where the revival started with Christopher Eccleston’s first outing as the Time Lord. David Tennant is so established in the role now, seeing the leather-jacket clad, harsher take from Eccleston is somewhat eye opening and makes you wonder how things would have gone had he stayed beyond the one series.

Rogue Restaurants (Thursday 8.30pm, BBC1)

I’m not recommending Rogue Restaurants, I’m warning you to stay clear. This is the worst kind of smug, patronising consumer show that has no place on the BBC, and would even get short shrift from Five in a perfect world. Matt Allwright and Anita Rani try to dress up this expose of the restaurant world with some painful humour as they send people undercover in kitchens across the country. True, there are some pretty horrendous discoveries along the way, but it’s how this show is packaged that really turns your stomach.

Harley Street (Thursday 9pm, ITV1)

Hurrah! My favourite guilty pleasure, Bonekickers aside, comes to brighten up Thursday night. Things are perked up no end this week by guest-appearances from Wendy Craig and June Whitfield as two sisters, and they really show these young whipper-snappers what proper acting is. I will say this for the three leads though, they have very nice coats.

If you’ve watched BBC3 over the last few days, you may well have caught a trailer for a new sitcom. How Not to Live Your Life starts on Tuesday 12 August and centers around Don, a twenty something man with bad luck and even worse instincts. The sitcom is peppered with ‘quick fire fantasy sequences’, according to the BBC. Like this one:

You don’t see stuff like that on the Apprentice, now do you?

Following the successful pilot which was broadcast last year, How Not to Live Your Life is a six-part series produced by Brown Eyed Boy.

The Tudors Friday 9pm, BBC2
The period romp returns for a second series, with Jonathan Rhys Meyers’ unfeasibly attractive Henry VIII battling with the Pope (Peter O’Toole) over his relationship with Anne Boleyn. It may have less historical accuracy than a Shakespeare ‘history’ (and that’s going some) but it’s never less than compellingly watchable, with the dashing cast complemented by some of the finest costumery in modern television.

QI Friday 10pm, BBC2
It’s on continuous rotation on digital channel Dave, and it feels like forever since a new episode was broadcast. Still no change there — but here, we have a welcome showing of the very first episode, kicking off a repeat run of the very first series. The whole thing is a little more hesitant and belaboured than the show it quickly grew into, making it an intriguing opening chapter in the history of a modern classic.

Tonightly Friday 11pm, Channel 4
An odd Friday night start for a new weeknight comedy show that will run Monday to Friday for the next three weeks. Hosted by 8 Out of 10 Cats’ Jason Manford, the channel’s clearly pitching this as an attempt to recapture the buzz around The 11 O’Clock Show, the similarly satirical late evening show which featured the first TV successes of Ali G, Mackenzie Crook, Ricky Gervais and, um, Iain Lee.

Last Choir Standing Saturday 6.30pm, BBC1
Regular readers will know I have a soft spot for BBC Saturday night light entertainment shows, and Last Choir Standing is proving no exception — even if, as I mused in our series preview, it still feels like a concept that would work better on a Sunday evening (where the results show is on at 9.30pm) than a Saturday night. This week sees the last of the pre-recorded heats, with just two more of the five choirs featured going through to the live elimination rounds, which start next Saturday. The five competing this week are Cheshire’s A Handbag of Harmonies, the ACM Gospel Choir from Guildford, the City of Bath Male Choir, Hear Me Now! from London and Belfast’s Open Arts Community Choir

Dad’s Army night Saturday from 8pm, BBC2
Celebrating forty years since the first broadcast of one of Britain’s finest ever sitcoms, BBC2 devotes its evening to celebrate Jimmy Perry and David Croft’s wry take on the most mismatched of Home Guard volunteers. Appropriately, given that Dad’s Army is on perennial repeat, all of tonight’s tribute programmes, including a documentary hosted by Victoria Wood and an Arthur Lowe-themed episode of Reputations, have been shown before. A new programme, Jonathan Ross Salutes Dad’s Army, is on Sunday at 7pm.

Boy A Saturday 9pm, More4
In a weekend that’s chock full of repeats, here’s the best of the bunch. Andrew Garfield’s Bafta-winning turn as a child killer released back into the community under a new identity is mesmerising to watch.

Summer Heights High Saturday from 9.20pm, BBC3
If you haven’t caught Australian Chris Lilley’s school-set mockumentary, here’s a treat for you — all eight episodes of the first series, back to back.

Agatha Christie’s Marple Sunday 8pm, BBC2
And the travesty continues. Geraldine McEwan’s Jane Marple is far too overtly dotty for my tastes — and dotty is the only thing that can describe this story, as it is an adaptation of a Christie novel which never included Miss Marple at all. Towards Zero was a murder mystery that originally featured one of Christie’s lesser-known regular characters, Superintendent Battle. Here, the spinster from St Mary Mead takes the detecting role, although she’s supported by the vaguely Battle-like Superintendent Mallard, played by Alan Davies. As ever, there’s a top notch supporting cast, headed by Eileen Atkins with Julian Sands, Zoe Tapper and Paul Nicholls in tow — and as ever, there are one or two frankly odd casting choices. I mean, Greg Rusedksi?