So Germany won Eurovision, and the United Kingdom are marooned at the bottom of the table. How can we recover from last place?
Decide if you want to try again
This is actually a lot easier than it sounds. The Eurovision Song Contest fulfils a lot of the charter requirements for the BBC. The BBC does have to pay part of the licence fee to the European Broadcasting Union (and the EBU part finances the Contest), but that cost, and the Eurovision budget for the year, is less than three hours of prime time Saturday night television (and another four hours on BBC 3).
It’s cost-effective, it meets the charter requirements, and while this year saw a drop in viewing figures, in the years when we send a good song that’s generally reflected in a larger audience.
Look in the mirror and say “the problem is us”
Don’t hide behind the myth of political voting deciding the contest. Germany is not in any acknowledged blocs of voting and the idea that the public decided to support Germany because they might bail out the economy deserves a place in a cheap cabaret stand-up show, not in a sensible discussion.
We failed because the song we put on stage was rubbish
Josh did the best he could with the material. His performance came across well on TV (but it was no Greece), but the song was neutered at birth. Partly because of the choice of parents, but also because having to write a generic song that worked with a male singer, or a female, or a duo, or a duet, or a group just so there could be a public vote does not translate to a song that’s going to win a song contest.
The BBC compromised the song long before Josh was selected to be the plucky Brit standing alone on the fjords of this Norwegian Expedition.
Where was the promotion in the countries that could vote for us? It’s great Josh got so many interviews on BBC local radio and the UK national press but was that more to convince the UK that the BBC was doing something, rather than actually do something like getting him in the National Finals of other countries?
In 2009, Jade and her record company helped out with promotion across Europe. Even though the BBC was working solo for 2010, they had a blueprint of what had worked last year. Which drawer had it been left in?
Don’t coast to a song, make a decision and be proactive.
While the Eurovision Song Contest would like the songs and performers to be decided by a public vote in a national final, it’s not a hard and fast rule. Israel this year chose Harel Skaat as their singer, and then presented a choice of songs to the TV viewers to vote on.
The BBC needs someone the country can get behind, someone that provides a good story to promote, and someone who can handle an arena of 16,000 or more. That’s not a talent show winner. Yes, there is the occasional success, such as Germany’s Lena this year, but for every Leona Lewis there are countless Steve Brooksteins.
Turkey took the money normally spent on a national final, handed it to rockers maNga and essentially said “write a song to make us proud.” maNga presented three songs to TRT (the Turkish broadcaster) and the chosen song, “We Could Be The Same” came second.
If they were to ask, I would push the BBC to choose the team to produce and write the song immediately. Management know the exact reasons why Xenomania pulled back from working on the Contest in 2010 - if the rumours of falling out over Radio 1 airplay are true then they need to get together in a room and sort out an approach over all the BBC resources and sort out the internal politics.
Whoever you get, give them what they need, and ask for four songs to be ready for a National Final in January. Don’t go for a talent search - anyone still entering these has probably had multiple attempts at Britain’s Got Talent, The X-Factor and previous Eurovision searches. If you’ve got a solid backroom team, ask them to get the singer.
Maybe you should consider dropping the National Final, and instead do a three part documentary on the preparation for Eurovision. It could be structured to be event television throughout the year, as happened with David Tennant’s specials for Doctor Who — incidentally, of course, another long-running franchise that used to be treated like a punch line in a joke.
You know you’ll have a decent song to take to Germany, a decent performer to sing, and you can focus on getting the PR on other National Finals around Europe and prove to the rest of the continent you are taking the contest seriously. If you do, we will see a respectable result. Just as we did with Jade.
Realise you are starting from scratch
After the 2008 contest I wrote that the BBC needed to build up respect around Europe:
The BBC must work to make Eurovision palatable to professional songwriters and artists again. For 2009, it needs to make a conscious effort to clean the Eurovision name.
They managed that with Andrew Lloyd Webber, and had a good platform to build on for 2010. The decision to put Pete Waterman on it means that the credibility has been destroyed, and as a country we need to start again.
So do what you need to do to get a credible song and performer in the contest for 2011 and start the process all over again. Use the breadth of the BBC if you have to, but get them on board early; cleanse the brand (again) for professional musicians; and get everything lined up for an Olympian effort in 2012 to take up back into the Top Ten of the results table.
The fans felt you didn’t take it seriously this year. The rest of the continent felt the same. Only the BBC knows if this is truly the case, but if it looks like a duck, sings like a duck, it probably gets the same number of votes as a duck.
Look back, see what went wrong… and don’t do it again. You can make us proud to fly the flag at Eurovision once again.
Yes - you're right.
Would love to make a start by making tha actual SONG contest open to every British song writer through a recognisable format.
Next up - having chosen the song - get a recognisable "star" name to sing it. Get it released in the UK and Europe BEFORE the competition to allow it to osmose into the public's conciousness before voting time.
In fact - isn't this what used to happen when we were competitive all those years ago?
This is a great event, a great competition and great TV. Just look at events liek West End Eurovision to see what talent is willing to latch onto the fun!
Our song for this year was a dud from the start. It had no impact and sounded completely out of date. How about some contemporary songwriters & producers in the running for next year?
Having said that, I have a feeling the BBC may put even less effort into our entry for 2011. After all, I doubt they'll want the UK to host the contest in 2012 when we've already got the Olympics to worry about...
Absolutely spot on, Ewan. I agree with everything you say. And I was just making the comparison with Doctor Who myself this morning. In the eighties it was unloved and derided - and that was just within the walls of the BBC! Then someone who loved the show and had a belief that it could be huge again (when all around him doubted him) took it and reinvented it. I absolutely feel the same could happen with Eurovision. Yes, let us do the same as Turkey. Abolish a national final and the public vote. Give it to an artist or band who really want to be involved (and I know there are several) and tell them to do with it what they want. We will win again. And I suspect it will be quite soon. But the BBC needs to show the project that care and attention first.
Brilliant! Superb exposition of what is wrong about the BBC's approach to the contest. Couldn't agree more. If the objective is to produce a worthy song which is capable of winning, the BBC is failing woefully.
Excellent piece and I couldn't agree more. My gut instinct is to tell the BBC to simply hand over the reins to an established artists and let them do whatever they want with their 3 minutes, promotion and all - but if they really are tied to the idea of a national final, it needs to snap out of this Dorothy-esque "light entertainment" mode with the all-pervading whiff of Barrowman and become something actually relevant to the amazing music industry the UK has. I simply don't trust the Beeb to know how to do that, unfortunately...
Good analysis - the 'political voting' argument just doesn't wash, given we managed to come 5th last year. I was in Oslo for this year's competition and the goodwill to the UK is huge, but so many people said to me - "I'm sorry, but your song is awful".
The song is critical, and Ewan's point about Waterman having to write something suitable for any act is a very astute one, especially given that the whole decision to use PWL seemed to be taken at the very last minute.
This is an opportunity to get a songwriter publicity to a huge audience, and create a massive European hit, like 'Satellite' will be. Give them their head! Let the creative process work out of sight of viewers who are only interested in voting for the cutest/smiliest/cheesiest singer and song. The BBC has the resources and the expertise, what it needs is the confidence to get it right.
You've hit the nail right on the head, my only wish is that someone in the BBC reads it and takes note! I guess there was no incentive (other than professional pride) for Pete Waterman to do anything but sling in the first thing he thought of, which in all honesty is what this years song sounded like, even with 3 re-writes.
The problem the BBC have is they find a system and go with it until it fails, then blame the system and make up a new one. The one singer many songs approach (see Michael Ball '92, Sonia '93) was going well until it de-railed in '94 with Frances Ruffelle coming 10th (although we'd kill for that now!) so what do we do, change the system instead of admitting that years bunch of songs didn't work. Same problem this year, ALW worked because he actually cared, stick with the system except with someone who doesn't, end result dross.
Also, this show should be devoid of people such as John Barrowman, Bruno Tonioli etc and involving people who know the music industry.
I thin the major problem is that we still look at Eurovision as if it were a Saturday night light entertainment show while the rest of Europe have started treating it like a music show - and there is a difference.
I've interviewed many a top flight act over the years who've said they'd love a go at doing Eurovision, but they just don't know how to go about it. I know a lot of folks are saying it, but look at the French - they, like us, can't get relegated, so send established acts that they can be proud of.
Would it be hard for us to send Take That? Dizzee Rascal? Heck, even Motorhead? How much fun would any of those been - and I reckon at least two thirds of them would be up for it!
I've long held the opinion that the Mercury Prize shortlist should constitute the artists for a remoulded Song For Europe. Get the lot of them to provide a new and original song, and let them battle it out in Jools Holland style round robin on BBC2. Then whoever gets picked in a public phone off (yes, even the bonkers jazz noodly stuff!) would almost certainly be someone we could proudly get behind.
Or hang about - why don't we just send Jools Holland rattling out a bit of boogie woogie on the old Joanna?
There's limitless interesting and creative things we could do with our selection process, but I fear that thems upstairs who decide these things either don't get the contest, or are too scared of taking a risk with something a little bit left-handed. C'mon, commission Dizzee now and send the whole of Europe Bonkers!
Thank you, finally someone who can write without the usual bandwagon accusations of "bloc-voting, political voting, race card, UK hating, etc". An excellent analysis without judgement, of why the UK continue to fail so miserably at Eurovision and what to do about it.
Throughout the whole of the country, the UK has incredible, unlimited talent, yet EVERY year without fail, we send dribble (2009 composition included though Jade did have a great voice that carried the song throughout).
Has no-one considered why so many countries choose to sing in English? The rest of Europe know that to crack the Global charts with their own brand of music, they have a better chance to do so if singing in English or an Americanised accent. And so, they have had to modify and grow and push forward to make themselves heard. Not so the UK.
Eurovision is now a Brand, not just a one-night show. It has become a huge business and not just in Europe. If the UK (sorry read BBC) continue to take the familiar, outdated approach to the contest then do not be surprised if (when the EBU get fed up with UK's "cant be bothered stance") we find ourselves out of the Big4 and alongside the 30+ other countries struggling to qualify from the semis. The semis were introduced to get rid of the "poor quality" songs to make the final more entertaining. See the UK results over the last 12 years, can we honestly say we deserve to be in ANY Final on the basis of the garbage we've sent. Jade and Jessica Garlick excepted.
What has happened to this great musical nation? I have a huge fear the BBC have way too much control for things to be any different next year or any other year after. They tried to appease us last year with ALW and to a certain degree pulled it off......or should that be pulled the wool over our eyes? This year, it was clear to anyone who's not tone deaf, the BBC sweater was again pulled down tight over our faces. We're wise to this now BBC, we know you dont want the UK to win so there's only one decent thing to do......hand over your franchise to the independent networks who might actually care to get the UK back into the top again........CONSISTENTLY!
I'm a big Eurovision fan.......but the BBC are single-handedly destroying any musical credibility this country has left. So go now BBC, drop the ESC and let someone else make the greatest show on earth actually mean something to the Brits.
This is fighting talk and it makes me feel very positive that we can sort it out and get back into the top five next year...
No, sod that. Bloody well win it next year!
Yes, there are the BBC's mistakes...
(a) jamming in Eurovision selection as an afterthought between Arlene Phillips and Dorothy - I was in Oslo with people who were at Your Country Needs You and they commented on how cheap and badly organised the whole deal was. Much more attention paid to sealing your mobile phones in airport-security bags lest you take a photo of the process or do anything vaguely social-mediaish to spread the word.
(b) getting Pete Waterman to spend the early part of an afternoon rearranging a few bars of something Big Fun would have rejected with copy'n'paste bars from Kids in America. This, I imagine, was the "We did a ballad last year"-rationale. Well, that's fine. Do something up-tempo, fine, but get the BBC Cardigans out of the 80s - or at least out of the their cardigans - so they realise that there's no such thing as a typical formula Eurovision song any more.
But some things they did well...
In Paul Condon, they have someone who ran the BBC Eurovision online presence brilliantly and with dedication and really engaged with the audience, talking directly to the fans via Facebook and Twitter. This needs to be expanded and brought forward for next year. If that can be promoted and shared more effectively in other competing countries, all to the good. The situation where the BBC Eurovision website contains media you can only watch in the UK with an "If you're watching this outside the UK, go to You Tube" nonsense needs to end.
But did the German entry stand out from the 39 tracks I downloaded a few weeks back? Nope, not for me. (I must be old...!) I thought we'd be looking at Belgium or Cyprus or Ireland's minor song from the Titanic soundtrack.
This has to mean that the main message for the BBC is that any style or genre of song can win if its support is built steadily and and systematically in the months (not weeks, Auntie...) before the contest, right across Europe.
Josh is the same age as Lena. He's a nice guy and a good singer. He worked hard with what the BBC gave him and was gracious in defeat, still smiling the following morning.
But he didn't have the number 1 in 17 European countries which would have allowed him to walk around Oslo in the days before the contest with some pluck and assurance. David, above, is right - as UK fans we got a great reception in Norway, but there was something of a "never mind!" pity from them, as they didn't much rate (or even recognise...) what we'd brought with us.
Next year, I'm going to make more effort and I expect the BBC to as well. When I'm walking round Berlin (or Munich or Hamburg or Hannover) with my friends and my newly acquired table-cloth e-Bay Union Jack, I want the people of Europe to smile and raise their glasses and slap us on the back and ask for photos...
But I also want them to be a bit on edge...
Come on, we need some blinking credibility..we are a country filled with British musical talent!!!
Most of the European entries are country’s without known record labels and are searching for recognition but as shown this year the winner was a well known singer and the song was well known around europe.
Employing Andrew Lloyd Webber to compose a song was a start in the right direction but Pete Waterman, when was it that he last had a hit???circa 1989????
The British public did not have a say in what the song was or how it was performed on the night and I feel that with it being an inclusive competition, we should feel happy with what we enter.
His song, “That sounds good to me” was dated, cheesy and stale. Josh Dubovie looked extremely uncomfortable up there having to sing it, it was constantly reworked before being performed and I felt for him, having to be surrounded by badly choreographed and badly chosen backing dancers and singers.
We came last place??..I’m not suprised..embarrasing it is and we can do so much better, even if we dont actually win, it would be so much better to walk away happy and know that our song was credible and believed in by the majority of the British Public.
As previously rumoured to be the chosen composer for our entry at the end of 2009, Gary Barlow would have been our best hope and has probably the best credentials in Europe in songwriting.
He has been at the forefront of the music industry for over 20 years. I say he has the talent and the understanding to create an amazing song to represent us.
I also believe that judging by Germany's 2010 winner that we need a known performer to sing the song, it’s a well known fact that the european entries are pop acts before the competition and therefore have already been widely known to the audience.
Eurovision should not be seen as ridiculous and something to stay away from as it could tarnish your career but a stepping stone and a stage to show our emerging british talent.
I believe that we should have a credible and professional talent show (possibly headed by Simon Cowell) to search for our performer and publicise that performer well.
Britain's got talent did it and so did the X Factor, why cant the BBC publicise this well??
I have set up this facebook page for fans to join to try and get Gary Barlow to compose the entry for next year and then maybe we can hold our face up again.
If all goes well, it will get noticed and we can send in a petition!
I agree wholeheartedly with this article. Well done Ewan.
Surely what this year proves is that our approach to this contest simply isn't working. The BBC seems determined to find a 'Eurovision' song as opposed to a song worthy of representing our country on the world stage.
I would love to see the BBC launch a songwriting competition but if they're determined to follow the one-songwriter one-song route then please choose someone more contemporary. Gary Barlow? Maybe. Ryan Tedder? Possibly. Cathy Dennis? Why not? They don't even need to be well known although a proven track record in writing current, successful material would be a definite advantage.
Let's get away from the traditional final. It didn't work this year: hardly anyone watched it, those who did hated it, the press slated it and our song ended up last. Please BBC - try something new!
As a german I know the same discussion from the last years, in the past there was no country giving 8, 10, 12 points automatically to Germany, but surprisingly Germany won this year and Lena was 'adopted' by the northern european countries and got many points from the balkan. Block-voting? - Sure, but let's face it - neither a jury-voting, nor any different rules will change this.
And block voting is not the whole truth!
This year, Britain's problem was not block-voting and even not Josh. There is no way a 19-year old singer can convince the viewers to send sms or vote for an 80's song in an 80's arrangement. Often western european countries are sending an artificial, replacable song mixture. But despite his last place, the victory of Lena / satellite (and also the good place of Tom Dice) are good news for the BIG-4 or other western european countries.
As in Britain, Germany changed their national contest. This year in style of casting shows, with a final of two contestants, both had to perfom two similar songs and one individual song. The viewers picked out the best potential song for each finalist and then at last they voted between them for Lena (with satellite) - Maximum of freedom to choose for the viewers.
But there was also a difference to other casting shows: The preliminary selection of contestants wasn't only focussed on the best singer, dancer, best looking guy/girl. It also was about personality - there were some contestants you would never see in other casting shows. The song 'satellite' was also performed by the other female finalist - in a ballad-arrangement, better voice, better singing, also good looking - the type of artist you normally know from other castings. Lena won because of her uniqueness, smile, personality.
So this indicates that it's not about the rules of the national contest, if Britain do so next year, you better don't forget this. Give the public the most possible range of songs and performers and Britain will be more successful in eurovision.
Couldn't agree more with Joe. I also saw this in Germany from a German perspective. Germany put as much planning and cleverness into this as they put into winning the football World Cup. The artist Lena was chosen very cleverly because of her appeal to teenagers. She was unspoilt and a rare relaxed very open personality not afraid to speak from her heart but with an intelligent head. The contrast to other performers was obvious. She had the experience of Stefan Raab backing her all along the way, but supplied in a mentoring not managing way. Add to that a good song which could be sung in the bathroom, or only with minimal backing, and you have a winner. Germany had good songs in previous years but has learned the hard way you need all these things to come together to win. It is a very tough competition, and Germany beat much less memorable songs into second and third place, which could still have beaten them. Even with everything on your side it is now a very tough competition, which requires bags of invested experience to win. Look and learn, and get some skilled patronage helping all along the way. With the available skills in the UK applied thus, a British song can win again, but you've got to take it, and all of it, seriously.
Absolutely spot on - I hope you're emailing this to the BBC!
Great article. I may not be British but I will be here for the next 3 years. I love the Eurovision but it's tough to enjoy it when you're in a country where it's so ridiculed and derided.
I hate those arguments about it being an unjustifable expense on British taxpayers or bloc voting. They don't stand up to any kind of examination. But I'm sure the same old arguments will resurface next year.
Many people have already made some very good points; I won't repeat them. But maybe the first step in your grand plan to win the Eurovision should be to rehabilitate its image in this country. You may struggle to get good song writers to contribute their songs to the competition if they think such participation could harm their credibility. If the competition is no longer seen as an extravaganza of European oddities and awful music, more artists will wish to avail of this invaluable platform. Maybe some repsonsibility lies with the Eurovision fans here. If the BBC believe that no one really cares for the Eurovision, well then they'll think they can send any old rubbish and no one will really care. It's important that they, and the county as a whole, realise that many people care deeply how our (or should I say your) country is represented at the Eurovision.
This year was so bad, I think the BBC will feel compelled to make sure they don't send some 80 reject crap again. It's a great competition and we'd hate to lose you, Britain.
Couldn't agree with you more, Ewan (So sorry we never got to meet in Oslo - I couldn't get accreditation, bah...). I did a couple of radio interviews while I was there and the concensus from the presenters was, 'of course, we always come last...' (forgetting our good form in '09) and the 'eveyone else hates the UK and votes for their mates next door'. It's such a lazy, convenient excuse to trot out for not making an effort. Unfortunately, they are the voices which get heard when plans for Eurovision are being made.
However, I have a horrible feeling that until London 2012 is a distant memory, the BBC are under strict instructions to send something that won't come within sniffing distance of the top of the scoreboard.
Very good article - I agree with much of what you said.
The bloc voting argument did hold up until last year, a number of countries pulled out because of the argument. The irony is that the biggest voting bloc - Scandinavia - use to support the UK, now we dont get any points from them anymore. But now with 50% professional music jury vote - although I am aware that the 'professional' is used loosely - this has changed and it must be more of an embarrassment then ever to come last. Music professionals are basically telling you your song won't work in any music industry anywhere in Europe.
Unfortunately with your ideas there are two problems. In the current climate of BBC phone in scandals and expenses the BBC needs to look transparent. A 'talent search' contest offers this transparency, a kind of 'well you picked them' approach. Taking everything in doors may raise a few questions, and if the song ever came last again, no doubt a political and media backlash.
Second of all, the UK does so much home promotion, not to prove to the UK the BBC are actually doing something about Eurovision, but to actually pull in the viewers. I assume the BBC doesnt mind where the UK place, as long as the viewers are at home watching. Promoting the song outside of Europe defeats this object. I would assume thats why the BBC gave so much attention to the 'big names' like Graham Norton and Pete Waterman and not to the actual song. All the trailers featured those two - not the singer nor song!
It's also a shame that the wider media don't provide the attention it deserves, in the same way X factor or search for a West End Star takes up inches of tabloids, Eurovision only gets a mention when Lord Webber states he wont go to Moscow if the wrong person wins or when Scooch use off stage backing singers. It would be nice to support the singer regardless and get a bit of national pride, as you would if they were in a swimming pool or on a field for your country.
Has it not dawned on anyone that as a nation we are simply not liked! The song wasn't the worse song of the evening, yet we accept that it must be, because we came last. Is this just a song contest??
It really makes sense to read this highly informative link:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lena_Meyer-Landrut
It is pretty obvious this is the winning formula to follow if you want to appear in the top ten:
1/ pick the artist (the way probably doesn't matter so much), who should have youth appeal but not unpalatable to baby boomers
2/ have the artist present a number of songs to the public in a national pre-show
3/ emulate the eurovision voting scheme to select the song
4/ get some good people on board to present the winning song - both beforehand in promotion and dealing with all aspects of the artist's preparation and performance on the night.
Not too hard, is it?
@ bill, full agree, plus:
5/ and then don't try to coach the artist in a professional way for mainstream purpose.
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Stefan Raab said once after Lena's national performance: "Everybody can hear that you've never had a professional singing education .. in your breath technique and the manner you sing. And you never should have! YOU should teach THEM your way!"
Sending an exchangeable song and singer, wouldn't change anything for Britain. Let the audience decide both, the combination song & artist, don't try to make it eurovision-suitable. Even if you have the last place, you can say THIS is OUR song & artist and it will be at least successful in Britain!
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And even if you send a well known artist, it covers the same risks as until now - song and artist may not be a good combination. The assumption of the music industry and audience ears are different pair of shoes ...
They actually showed how they did it, and used footage from the webcams, showing kids who were clearly unaware.
Hello, I have been writing songs for a few years but have never sent any to record producers. I am English but speak German, French, Spanish and Italian and I have written songs in all these languages. Could anyone tell me e-mail addresses, addresses, telephone numbers and names of people to contact in England and the other countries that I have mentioned so that I can enter one of my songs. I would be very grateful to hear from anyone who could help. Thank you. Suzanne
I am a songwriter and would love to submit a song to represent my country. Unfortunately for the reasons mentioned in this article and others, I will never get the chance, nor will others in my boat. I'd jump at the chance to represent any other country that would take my contribution but I can't seem to find anything online. This is not a song contest anymore, it's a television programme governed by profits. If anyone can help me submit a song: teddylong12@gmail.com :o)