Recent posts in the Square Eyes category

Holby City (Tuesday 8pm, BBC1)

It’s always worth checking in every now and then on the lives and loves of Holby General, and it’s pretty much business as usual this week with lots of corridor walking, inter-staff affairs and arguments over the operating table. The central story this week involves an enigmatic millionaire evangelist who offers to stump up the cash to have the conjoined twins separated. Ulterior motive? Probably…

Mutual Friends (Tuesday 9pm, BBC1)

A promising new comedy drama with a great cast, including Marc Warren, Keeley Hawes and Alexander Armstrong. A group of friends are thrown back together following the suicide of an old friend and they find their lives are not as solid as they thought. Warren is at the centre of things as Martin, with an unhappy wife (Hawes) and Armstrong as his ageing Lothario mate Patrick adding to his general confusion and impending mid life crisis existence. Mutual Friends is likeable in a very familiar kind of way and there’s some sharp dialogue that might just help this along as the TV schedules coast that downhill run into autumn.

The Last Word (Tuesday 10.35pm, BBC1)

Slightly more successful than last night’s outing in Hugo Blick’s series of new monologues, this second piece features rarely-out-of-the-tabloids Rhys Ifans as a farmer attempting to break free from a domineering mother, as always seeking the last word of the title. Ifans is a fine actor, his tabloid adventures taking away from the fact that he’s actually a master craftsman when given fantastic material. Thankfully this is one of those occasions.

Doctor Who (Wednesday 7.05pm, BBC3)

With the finale of the last series of Doctor Who still fairly fresh, cast your mind back to 2005 and the finale of series one that saw Eccleston morph into Tennant for a bit of compare and contrast. It’s an interesting watch given the distance of a couple of years, with a restraint exercised in Russell T Davies’s script that seems to evaporate in the coming years as the production team became more confident with what they could achieve (for better of worse in some cases). Platoons of Daleks flying through space and the Doctor making the ultimate sacrifice to save the universe and Rose make for an exciting finish, but it’s the arrival of Tennant that firmly sets this series on course to critical and popular acclaim. Fantastic!

My Zinc Bed (Wednesday 9pm, BBC2)

A sinister drama that adapts David Hare’s play on the nature of addiction that positively fizzes with rapier sharp dialogue and a couple of great performances from Jonathan Pryce and Paddy Considine. Pryce is multimillionaire Victor Quinn, who preys on his wife’s (Uma Thurman) vulnerability brought about by addiction. And then arrives alcoholic poet Paul (Considine) into their lives, and the game gets a new dimension. Thurman doesn’t quite fit this exceptional piece, and some of the inherent stage quality might put some people off, but My Zinc Bed is well worth a look despite this.

The Wrong Door (Thursday 10.30pm, BBC3)

BBC3 continues to court a younger, hipper audience and brings special effects and CGI trickery to the sketch show format to create a fun new comedy. It’s visually brilliant - I can’t remember a sketch show that ever had a velociraptor running around a park - but as with any sketch show, the actual mechanics of the comedy itself can be hit and miss. Thankfully there are more hits than misses here, and I’ll be back next week to see how things develop. And for any new sketch show, the very virtue of it not being the dire The Kevin Bishop Show raises things up a level before the first episode has even aired.

The Nominees (Thursday 10.30pm, FX)

After the well-deserved success of Chris Lilley’s brilliant Summer Heights High on BBC3 earlier this summer, it was only a matter of time before somebody picked up the Australian comedian’s 2005 forerunner. And here it is, with more of the same style of comedy following the lives of a disparate collection of characters that are all up for the award of Australian of the Year. If you didn’t get Summer Heights High, you won’t get this, but it’s just as good, if not better, than Lilley’s international breakthrough.

The Tudors (Friday 9pm, BBC2)

Henry isn’t a happy little king this week (although as a rule of thumb it’s usually hard to tell). His beloved Anne Boleyn is on a downer following the birth of Elizabeth, which has taken the wind out of H’s sails a bit, not to mention Sir Thomas More sticking his oar in on the royal child’s baptism. It’s all enough to drive a king to distraction, but it’s surely only a matter of time before he’s back on his game - he’s still got a few more wives to get through, after all. Entertaining, stylish and hopelessly inaccurate on historical detail - I love it!

Comedy Connections (Friday 10.35pm, BBC1)

In the great pantheon of the sitcom, Sorry! is not one that generally finds its way to the lips of televisual scholars (aka your mate down the pub). But this Ronnie Corbett vehicle that ran throughout the 1980s is more beguiling than its reputation suggests, full of character, wit and some brooding subtext bubbling beneath the surface of Corbett’s timid librarian Timothy Lumsden. Corbett often loses out to his more feted colleague, the late Ronnie Barker, in the comedy stakes thanks to Porridge and Open All Hours, but in Sorry! he was note perfect, and this edition of Comedy Connections quite rightly celebrates those qualities. Language Timothy!

Z Cars (Friday 10pm, BBC4)

It might feel a little odd sitting in on a Friday night watching Z Cars, but there isn’t much else on, and this, also shown last Tuesday, is a little bit of TV history and pure gold. It’s the first episode (and beautiful quality) of the classic BBC series that brought a new style of production to the police procedural. Detective Inspector Barlow and Detective Sergeant Watt recruit four feisty PCs to man the new unmarked crime cars to patrol the towns of Seaport and Newtown - Z-Victor 1 and Z-Victor 2 - the Z Cars. After nearly 50 years, this is still brilliant, vibrant stuff, with a great cast pulling it all together, with Stratford Johns proving a magnificent figurehead as Barlow, a character who, along with Watt, would outlast the original show that spawned him. Watch and wonder why we can’t make them like this any more.

Doctor Who Weekend (Sci-Fi Channel Saturday/Sunday/Monday)

In the absence of any new Who until Christmas, the Sci-Fi Channel dusts down some gems from the “classic” series, featuring Tom Baker, Peter Davison, Colin Baker and Paul McGann, with Patrick Troughton hitching a lift in The Two Doctors. The best of the weekend’s viewing are The Ark in Space on Saturday, seeing Baker, T taking on the insect Wirrn on a space station in the far future, and The Caves of Androzani on Sunday, Peter Davison’s swan song in the role and a contender as finest outing for the original run. Takes me back…

Last Choir Standing (Saturday 6.30pm, BBC1)

We’re at the semi-final stage of this talent show that, personally speaking, has lacked a certain sparkle.

The X Factor (Saturday 7.30pm, ITV1)

Week 2 and The X Factor juggernaut is in Birmingham and London to laugh and point and subject people who really don’t deserve it to some ritual humiliation. And don’t tell me that they didn’t have to audition - Simon Cowell’s terriers in the early selection stages before contestants even get to see the Four Who Rule should be ashamed of themselves for picking hopefuls on laugh value rather than talent. Of course, there are the arrogant, deluded coves that really do know better, but it’s the cruel elements of this show that have started to make me feel uncomfortable. There is entertainment to be had here, but I sometimes wonder at what cost.

Takin’ Over the Asylum (Saturday 10pm, BBC4)

A Bafta winning tour de force for all concerned, Takin’ Over the Asylum, rarely seen since first transmission, receives a long overdue dusting down. My word, it’s one of the best things ever shown on this little box we call TV. Ken Stott is wonderful as down at heel aspiring DJ Eddie McKenna, who takes on the challenge of bringing back a radio station to the drab and miserable corridors of a Glasgow psychiatric hospital. It’s a touching, poignant and funny depiction of a difficult subject, and writer Donna Franceschild works miracles. The series is also notable for an early role for a young fella called David Tennant as manic-depressive Campbell, who becomes McKenna’s enthusiastic sidekick in his battle to keep the station on air. A breathtaking piece of television genius.

Olympics 2008: Closing Ceremony (Sunday 12 noon, BBC1)

Oh god, Boris Johnson is out in Beijing to accept the flag in the handover to London for the 2012 games. Be afraid, be very afraid. Still, the closing ceremony should be a good bun fight if the opening ceremony was anything to go by - just watch out for the lip-synching…

Last of the Summer Wine (Sunday 7.05pm, BBC1)

A nostalgic episode of the sitcom that bravely soldiers on, seeing Clegg and Truly cast their minds back to old friend Compo and the scrapes he used to get into. I still have a great fondness for this old warhorse - I loved it as a kid, and this serves as a nice little tribute to the late Bill Owen who passed way in 1999.

Spooks: Code 9 (Sunday 9pm, BBC3)

London destroyed blah blah… new breed of terrorists blah blah… younger MI5 operatives blah blah… mole in the team blah blah… new world blah blah… new rules blah blah… When are Harry and Adam coming back, please and thank you?

Dexter (Sunday 10pm, FX)

Now if you want edgy, stylish drama but with grown ups on a Sunday night, then look no further than the wonderful Dexter, the second season of which is proving just as tense and exciting as season one, if not more so. Every episode appears to be taking our eponymous serial killer hero a step closer to being unmasked, and as we hit the final third of this second series, who knows where it could go? To a third season, that’s where…

Masterchef: the Professionals (Monday 6.30pm, BBC2)

Saints be praised, a new spin on the Masterchef format that sees Gregg Wallace preside over the trials of a group of young professional chefs who want to take their cooking to the next level. There are no enthusiastic amateurs here, no ill-considered chocolate fondants, and no waspish observations from John Torode. What?! No Torode? Sadly not, although we’re fairly sure he’ll be back for the common or garden Masterchef next year. Gregg’s co-judge for this competition that runs Monday to Friday, is the revered chef Michelle Roux Jr. Will this competition just get tougher? Probably…

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

Final episode of what has proved to be an excellent fifth series for the veteran coppers. The team are up against MI5 spooks and the MoD when they investigate the death of a soldier that may have links to a secret army medical lab. It’s as pithy as always and a great finale to the series, but rest assured, the team will return in a sixth series in the not too distant.

The Last Word Monologues (Monday 10.35pm, BBC1)

First in a three part series of monologues written, produced and directed by Hugo Blick. Sheila Hancock stars in this first piece as a terminally ill woman who prepares for a final conversation with her husband before she takes the path of euthanasia. It’s not quite as powerful as it could be, lacking the depth and honesty of Alan Bennett’s Talking Heads, but it’s still an engaging piece with a great performer. The series continues on Tuesday and Wednesday with monologues from Rhys Ifans and Bob Hoskins.

The Hairy Bakers (Monday 8.30pm, BBC2)

And with one quick change of a vowel, The Hairy Bikers find a new lease of life as The Hairy Bakers, riding around Great Britain in search of the best baking the country has to offer. This week the lads are looking at bread, and there are some great recipes on offer. That’s the main problem with this format, the food is fantastic, but the banter between the lads becomes wearing after a few minutes, especially Si King who I dearly wish would just SHUT UP and cook!

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

A veritable oasis after a tedious weekend of telly, New Tricks can always be relied upon to deliver the goods on a Monday evening. The team are drawn into the lives of a commune that appears to be at the centre of their most recent investigation. This gives Brian some solace from his usual demons and problems and the always-welcome chance for Alun Armstrong to demonstrate that he’s the best thing in New Tricks. Watch out for guest turns from Lorcan Cranitch and Sylvia Simms.

Crime Thriller Season (Monday 9pm, ITV3)

Tying in to this year’s Crime Thriller Awards, ITV3 commences a season showcasing some of the best detective drama put out by the broadcaster, starting with Ian Rankin, creator of the enduring Inspector Rebus series of novels (and one of my favourite writers). The author talks about his career, his love of Edinburgh and his famous creation. Following this interesting profile you can catch a repeat of The Falls, the first TV outing for Ken Stott as Rebus.

Liverpool on the Box (Tuesday 8pm, BBC4)

As part of the Liverpool season, this clip show charts the high and lows of the city as depicted on our TV screens, with usual suspects Boys from the Blackstuff, Brookside and Bread mixing in with segments from Z Cars. Nicely nostalgic and one for the TV history buffs.

Maestro (Tuesday 9pm, BBC2)

This engaging reality show continues as the celebrities crack on with the quest to conduct the BBC concert orchestra at the Proms. This week, the remaining hopefuls must endure a live performance at Television Centre to see if they have what it takes to go the distance. Good stuff.

Call the Cops (Tuesday 10pm, BBC4)

Sticking with BBC4 for more TV history, this documentary series continues with a look at the legendary and long-running Z Cars. It’s a show that everybody knows, but is little-repeated, and cast members James Ellis and Brian Blessed, amongst others, recall their time with this pioneering series. As the BBC cast about for a successful police procedural series after the death of Holby Blue, it surprises me that some bright executive hasn’t toyed with the idea of bringing back the show.

Trawlermen (Wednesday 8.30pm, BBC1)

It’s basically Deadliest Catch in all but name, but the BBC spin on the Discovery Channel hit is no less compelling or watchable. The Peterhead trawlermen head out into treacherous conditions to bring home a haul of fish that will put money on the table for their family. It’s a thankless task, but these guys put their lives on the line with good humour and tenacity that makes you think twice about your cod and chips on a Saturday night. Not that we should be eating cod, mind.

Who Do You Think You Are? (Wednesday 9pm, BBC1)

Considering tonight’s subject is Boris Johnson, I think this is a question many people would rather like answered.

House of Saddam (Wednesday 9pm, BBC2)

Gripping conclusion to a truly magnificent drama documenting the true story of the rise and fall of Saddam Hussein. There’s a more reflective air to this closing segment, with Saddam a fugitive in his own country, hiding out from coalition forces. He’s a broken man and this is a stark contrast to the proud and powerful creature we have seen throughout this series. And then you remember that the whole thing really happened, and that snaps you back to reality. Sobering.

Harley Street (Thursday 9pm, ITV1)

Back in 1998, when legendary sitcom Seinfeld came to an end in America, the nation vibrated under an onslaught of anguished cries from the populace. I anticipate much the same reaction in the UK when Harley Street heaves to an end on Thursday. Never more Suranne Jones’s plum-in-the-gob accent, ta-ra to the nice coats, and bye bye dialogue that would make the script editor of Bonekickers blush (still can’t resist having a dig at Bonekickers…)

The Cup (Thursday 9.30pm, BBC2)

A promising new comedy in that mockumentary style that’s so difficult to get right - this succeeds to an extent, but I’m not sure if it can sustain six episodes, but we’ll see how it goes. Steve Edge is obsessive dad Terry, whose son plays in a junior footie team that the documentary team is following. Much of the comedy revolves round competitive parents, and I get the feeling that is going to wear thin, but on the whole, this first outing for The Cup more or less succeeds.

The Tudors (Friday 9pm, BBC2)

Somebody’s playing the assassination game in tonight’s tale of everyday Tudor folk as they take a pot shot at Anne Boleyn. Poor Anne, nobody seems to like the girl, from the British public to the Pope (a fabulous Peter O’Toole). And Henry is sure to go off her pretty soon, even though she’s pregnant and all around are hoping for a bouncing baby boy… One feels there might be disappointment on the way. History has to play a small part in the narrative somewhere along the way. Doesn’t it?

Comedy Connections (Friday 10.35pm, BBC1)

Lifting the lid on another classic comedy. This week the long-running Rab C Nesbitt gets the connection treatment, full of the usual talking head interviews, revealing stories and clips galore. It’s not one of my favourite comedies ever (I prefer Still Game), but its place in the annals of comedy history are assured - there’s even a very early appearance from a young David Tennant in there somewhere…

The X Factor

It’s that time of year when The X Factor returns and the mammoth slog to Christmas begins in earnest. Of course there are well-publicised changes this year - Sharon is out, to be replaced Girls Aloud pop starlet Cheryl Cole (and you won’t find any complaints from me on that score). Also, over on The Xtra Factor on ITV2 straight after the main show, Holly Willoughby takes over from Fearne Cotton. Oh well, we can’t have everything. No doubt Louis will quit halfway through the run, only to be persuaded to come back by Simon in a flurry of tabloid scuttlebutt, but by now, it’s all just part of the fun. As always we start off with the heats, commencing in Manchester. Let the fun begin! (And come back to TV Today tomorrow for our review — Ed.)

Sleepers (Saturday 8pm, BBC4)

A shining beacon in a dull Saturday evening schedule (The X Factor aside), this frothy comedy thriller from the early 90s concludes. Our lovable Russian spies, played consummately by Warren Clarke and Nigel Havers, evade the covert forces of both the KGB and MI5 in a madcap chase around Britain. Hugely enjoyable and highly recommended. They don’t make ‘em like they used to. Instead, they make Bonekickers.

Dad’s Army (Saturday 8.30pm, BBC2)

Classic comedy to brighten up your Saturday in the company of the Walmington-on-Sea Home Guard. The residents of the town are no longer taking the threat of invasion seriously, so Captain Mainwaring engineers a plot for the platoon to pose as fifth columnists to teach them a lesson. Inspired and still brilliant.

Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? (Saturday 8.30pm, ITV1)

First in a new run of the perennial gameshow, only worth recommending as it’s a celebrity special featuring castmembers from Coronation Street. Does anybody know when Casualty is back?

Midsomer Murders (Sunday 8pm, ITV1)

You know that when an actor with the stature of Joss Ackland turns up in Midsomer Murders that he’s unlikely to make it to the first ad break… and so it as Sir Freddy Butler dies of a supposed heart attack. But then the will goes missing and his lawyer meets a hot and sticky end, so it isn’t long before Barnaby and Jones come running. Always fun in a gentle kind of way

Britain From Above (Sunday 9pm, BBC1)

A lovely show based on a simple premise - let’s have a look at the landscape of Britain from a great height. As I noted last week, it’s all very pretty, but I do wonder why it’s on at 9pm. Surely an earlier slot would allow some younger viewers to watch as its hardly offensive stuff - unless Andrew Marr is deemed too scary for a pre-watershed slot.

Spooks: Code 9 (Sunday 9pm, BBC3)

Well, thank goodness for some new drama, but a shame it’s the drearily incomprehensible Spooks: Code 9. The problem I have with the whole concept is BBC3’s desperate need to court a younger audience, crow-barring the embarrassing Maguffin that terrorists are getting younger, so it stands to reason that spies have to. Eh? This series lost me in episode one when Joanne Froggatt took a bullet. The regular cast, Georgia Moffett aside who acts her colleagues off the screen, are painfully dull and all look cloned from the same cardigan. I still think the series needs Peter Firth as Harry Pearce, chewing the scenery in grand style, to give things some context - couldn’t he have been on holiday when the bomb went off?

EastEnders (Monday 8pm, BBC1)

An emotional episode of EastEnders that sees a brief return for John Bardon as Jim Branning, his first appearance in the soap following a stroke last year. It’s perhaps made even sadder by the news that Bardon has been back in hospital recently. We wish the actor well for a speedy recovery and hope that Jim will be back in Albert Square again very soon.

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

In tonight’s episode of this Square Eyes favourite, the spotlight is on Alun Armstrong’s Brian as the team get involved with the reopening of a case that involved a wife being acquitted of offing her husband after being hypnotised. It’s great as always, and the dialogue is razor sharp - something I’m finding increasingly rare in modern drama (see Bonekickers and Harley Street).

Ian Rankin’s Hidden Edinburgh (Monday 11.20pm BBC2)

Previously shown on BBC4, this documentary, being shown to tie in with the paperback release Ian Rankin’s latest (and final) Inspector Rebus novel, has the author escorting us around various Edinburgh locations. Rankin is an engaging guide, and this serves as a nice backdrop to the range of best-selling novels.

Coming Up: Lickle Bill Um (Monday 11.40pm, C4)

Nice to see Channel 4 commissioning some e new dramas from emerging talent, but dismaying to see them tucked away in a late slot. This season of Coming Up dramas ties in to the current Generation Next season, and is written and directed by Kate Hardie. It features Amanda Abbington as a daughter who hires two kidnappers to abduct her overbearing mother. More of this please, but at a time when more people will see it.

Bonekickers (Tuesday 9pm, BBC1)

It’s the final episode of Bonekickers, and I admit I’m going to miss this genial mess of a drama. It has livened up my Tuesday evenings no end with its improbable plots, terrible dialogue and outrageously ham-fisted performances. And tonight they’ve saved the best for last as a round table is uncovered at the base of Glastonbury Tor. How very remiss of King Arthur to leave it there for anybody to stumble upon. The episode features a guest-turn from Dexter Fletcher, who clearly will be running straight back to Hotel Babylon very quickly for better scripts and dialogue. And yes, I meant that with no irony whatsoever.

Maestro (Tuesday 9pm, BBC2)

A fantastically entertaining piece of reality fluff that’s sees a group of celebrities take on the challenge of conducting the BBC Concert Orchestra. You might not think that would be make for riveting TV, but it’s a beguiling concept, and the celebs on hand go through tears, laughter and lots of dropped notes in their quest to win the prize of conducting at a Prom. Clive Anderson hosts and among the celebrities we have Katy Derham, Sue Perkins, Jane Asher, Bradley Walsh and the legendary David Soul. Can I put in a request for him to slide over a piano in true Starsky and Hutch stylee, please?

How Not to Live Your Life (Tuesday 10.20pm, BBC3)

A promising new sit-com from BBC3 that, while not wildly funny, is certainly not an embarrassing mess. Don navigates his way through life with not much success, careering from one catastrophe to another, peppered with fantasy sequences from our hapless anti-hero’s mind. It’s fast enough for any weaknesses not to really get noticed, but how long will that last? This one could go either way.

Who Do You Think You Are? (Wednesday 9pm, BBC1)

The return of a reliable BBC ratings banker that opens with Holby City’s Patsy Kensit having a shufty through her family history. The emotion is laid on thicker than usual in this edition as Pats, almost reluctantly, delves into some murky issues over her family’s involvement with various infamous gangster dynasties of yesteryear. It’s still a fascinating watch, and, despite the overflow of tears, you can’t help but feel for the girl a bit.

House of Saddam (Wednesday, 9pm, BBC2)

This truly gripping drama reaches 1995 and the backdrop of economic ruin for Iraq in the face of sanctions and the snooping of weapons inspectors. Saddam’s son, Uday, is becoming increasingly unhinged, which forces Hussein, Saddam’s most trusted adviser, to take drastic measures. But Uday’s actions are nothing to some of the things his dad is up to… It’s a compelling watch, and highly disturbing in places.

EastEnders (Thursday 7.30pm, BBC1)

A solemn occasion on EastEnders as Wellard goes to the big soap dog kennel in the sky. I like to think he’ll be gambolling round a big field in the sunshine with Roly and Little Willie…

Harley Street (Thursday 9pm, ITV1)

Bonekickers might be finishing this week, but there’s still one more episode of Harley Street to go - enjoy this joyous piece of work while it lasts as I doubt we’ll be seeing it back. I’m amazed at the quality of guest-stars this show has managed to attract, with James Fleet popping up tonight. I’m assuming he needs a new kitchen or something…

The Tudors (Friday 9pm, BBC1)

There’s something utterly joyous about The Tudors, isn’t there? It’s trashy and historically inaccurate, of course, but that’s hardly an original criticism of this show, so it’s best to just look the other way. Tonight there’s a Christmas present for Henry from the wonderfully pouty Anne Boleyn, but the King is busy trying to make his marriage to Catherine of Aragorn a thing of the past, which naturally Thomas More isn’t happy about (on behalf of God).

Comedy Connections (Friday 10.35pm, BBC1)

I must admit, I didn’t really get Ripping Yarns, but realise I’m probably alone in this stance among discerning comedy fans. But one can’t deny that, of all the shows covered by Comedy Connections, Ripping Yarns is perhaps the best connected of the lot, featuring as it does comedy royalty Michael Palin lampooning the classic era of boys’ own adventure tales. Amidst the clips, Palin fondly recalls the show, and there are also contributions from the likes of fellow-Python Terry Jones, who popped up in an episode.

The Great Wall of China (Saturday 7pm, Channel 4)

As the Olympics gets underway in Beijing, this docu-drama looks at the construction of The Great Wall of China and the minds behind its construction. Fascinating stuff, this is told from the point of view of a lowly soldier, an engineer and the young Chinese emperor of the day. While great feats are being performed in the name of sports in the present, gaze upon a great feat of the past.

Sleepers (Saturday 8pm, BBC4)

A little repeated drama from 1991 starring Nigel Havers and Warren Clarke as two Russian sleeper agents who are installed in Britain, where they blend in and wait for the call to serve their country and spy on the Brits. Problem is, when that call doesn’t come for 25 years, you might get a bit comfortable with the Rule Brittania life and not be too keen to start snooping, and that’s exactly what happens. Enjoyable and sweet, Havers and Clarke are brilliant, and with a supporting cast that includes David Calder, quality is assured. Now, if BBC4 can get round to repeating Taking Over the Asylum and Tutti Frutti, that would be great.

Casualty (Saturday 8.50pm, BBC1)

It’s the conclusion of a tense two-parter that sees Maggie up in court and fighting for her future. There might also be some medical stuff alongside somewhere - this is Casualty after all. After going through a good patch about a year ago, Casualty has returned to its dreary, mundane default. And to say that this is the top-rated and best show on a Saturday night is about as depressing as it gets. Hey ho.

The West Wing (Saturday 11.50pm, More4)

The West Wing meets Sesame Street? That’s got to be worth an hour of somebody’s time!

Britain from Above (Sunday 9pm, BBC1)

Lots of nice pictures of Britain from, erm… above. Pretty but ultimately pointless (obviously I’m not talking about presenter Andrew Marr…)

Spooks: Code 9 (Sunday 9pm, BBC3)

Perhaps the most incomprehensible spin-off from a TV series ever that actually ends up not really being a spin-off at all, so I don’t quite get the point of giving it the Spooks moniker. It’s 2013 and London, including the MI5 HQ Thames House, has been destroyed in a nuclear attack, and for some reason this means that the only people who can take on the terrorist threat are young people. Erm… just because, it seems. I just don’t get it - it’s like somebody set out to make The Sarah Jane Adventures and ended up with the first season of Torchwood. There’s a good cast populating this double-bill opener, including Joanne Frogatt and Georgia Moffett, but really, what’s the point?

Coronation Street (Monday 7.30/8.30pm, ITV1)

This is like one of the vintage episodes of 1970s Corrie that would routinely send Bet Lynch and a mis-matched travelling companion like Rita off in a camper van for a couple of days… with hilarious consequences. Packing Audrey Roberts and Bill Webster off on a booze cruise with Janice Battersby has disaster written all over, as Audrey is the only member of the party capable of driving back to Weaherfield after much alcohol has been imbibed. I like a soap that still finds time to embrace its fun side, but will there be more serious consequences for the haughty hairdresser?

The Genius of Charles Darwin (Monday 8pm, C4)

Ooh, this is likely to be a contentious piece of work as Richard Dawkins delves into the work of Charles Darwin 150 years after he attempted to educate the world on this new-fangled notion called “evolution”. Dawkins is a tricksy commentator and gets people’s danders up no end - you should see what the Doctor Who fans are saying about him following his appearance at the end of the last series (ironic, considering he’s married to an ex-Who girl Lalla Ward). But this is an engaging documentary that does what the best television should do - gets you thinking. Whatever your opinion of Dawkins, he always gets a reaction.

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

Family history comes back to haunt Pullman in tonight’s episode of the reliable drama series when the team reopen an investigation that was handled by a corrupt colleague of her father’s. Are there more familial skeletons waiting in cupboards?

Dr Alice Roberts: Don’t Die Young (Tuesday 8pm, BBC2)

A double-bill of bodily investigations with the likeable and engaging Dr Alice Roberts that’s as fascinating as it is quease-inducing. In this pair of episodes, the liver comes under Roberts’s piercing gaze, followed by the stomach and intestines. Nice! It’s an uncomfortable watch, but Roberts is so watchable and enthusiastic it hardly seems to matter. But then, I think I have a crush on her, so I’d probably watch Doc Roberts read the phone book to be honest.

Bonekickers (Tuesday 9pm, BBC1)

I had a shock at the weekend - a visit home and a trawl through my parents’ Sky+ habits revealed a worrying liking for Bonekickers. After getting over the shock and deleting all traces of the offending programme, I told my father the error of his ways and the subject was closed. But perhaps I’ve missed something about this show, some hitherto hidden element that’s alluring to a certain strata of the audience. Or perhaps I’m being too generous. I think there are good stories buried very deep beneath the ham-fisted execution, but however much I try, I simply cannot engage with Bonekickers. Tonight’s exciting unearthing revolves around the discovery of a First World War tank and the bodies of six soldiers within.

House of Saddam (Wednesday 9pm, BBC2)

This cracking piece of drama continues as we get to 1988 in the life, loves and wars of Saddam Hussein. Following the war with Iran, Iraq is on the brink of bankruptcy, but there is a celebratory air around the capital. The world events anchor House of Saddam to historical context, but the compelling moments in this mesmerising piece take place around the chicanery of the family dynasty. That’s where the real drama is to be had.

Doctor Who (Wednesday 7pm, BBC3)

After the hoo-ha of Doctor Who’s season finale that left the sci-fi adventure as popular and loved as ever, go back to where the revival started with Christopher Eccleston’s first outing as the Time Lord. David Tennant is so established in the role now, seeing the leather-jacket clad, harsher take from Eccleston is somewhat eye opening and makes you wonder how things would have gone had he stayed beyond the one series.

Rogue Restaurants (Thursday 8.30pm, BBC1)

I’m not recommending Rogue Restaurants, I’m warning you to stay clear. This is the worst kind of smug, patronising consumer show that has no place on the BBC, and would even get short shrift from Five in a perfect world. Matt Allwright and Anita Rani try to dress up this expose of the restaurant world with some painful humour as they send people undercover in kitchens across the country. True, there are some pretty horrendous discoveries along the way, but it’s how this show is packaged that really turns your stomach.

Harley Street (Thursday 9pm, ITV1)

Hurrah! My favourite guilty pleasure, Bonekickers aside, comes to brighten up Thursday night. Things are perked up no end this week by guest-appearances from Wendy Craig and June Whitfield as two sisters, and they really show these young whipper-snappers what proper acting is. I will say this for the three leads though, they have very nice coats.

Return to Castaway (Monday 7.30pm, BBC2)

Continuing the nostalgic series that looks back at fondly remembered reality shows, this week we get to Castaway, the BBC’s boldly worthy experiment from back in 2000 that didn’t quite make the mark that was hoped for. Still, it gave the world Ben Fogle…

Coronation Street (Monday 7.30/8.30pm, ITV1)

Finally Corrie seems to get some bite back as Liz McDonald tries to get it on with Harry, which just succeeds in winding up his ex-missus, Clarissa. One thing that Coronation Street does well, even in those occasional fallow periods, is witty and barbed exchanges, and this is good stuff. Even better is the brawl between Liz and Clarissa in Wednesday night’s episode, a classic amongst the many, many fights we’ve seen in the Rovers over the years.

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

Roger Lloyd-Pack guest-stars in tonight’s episode of the hugely enjoyable New Tricks as the bassist from a 70s band whose drummer has committed suicide. The band are closing ranks, making it difficult for Sandra and her team of old boys to get to the truth behind the death. Well-scripted and well-acted by an accomplished and engaging cast, New Tricks is always a pleasure and never, ever a chore.

Holby City (Tuesday 8pm, BBC1)

Obviously after that crazy trailer that’s been running for the last week, the ratings will be through the roof with people tuning in to a see show about a hospital that seemingly has everything from kinky sex and lifts that grow hands and molest its passengers. How disappointed they’ll be to find it only has Vyvian from The Young Ones having flashbacks to his time in the Congo. Surely there’s been some mistake…

Bonekickers (Tuesday 9pm, BBC1)

You know the name, you know the time - if Bonekickers hasn’t become appointment TV for you over the last few weeks, then get your diary out right now. You’ll listen slack-jawed at the over-egged dialogue, roll your eyes at the dreadful casting and laugh yourself sick at the wildy outrageous and silly plots. Tonight it’s some old toot about a brick from the Hanging Gardens of Babylon and a murder. And all this in Bath, which seems such a nice, quiet touristy kind of place. I’m hoping for an episode set in Sally Lunn’s tea shop, if only to give Hugh Bonneville the chance to say “Nice buns”. I know I said I was going to lay off being nasty to Bonekickers, but sometimes it’s just like shooting fish in a barrel.

House of Saddam (Wednesday 9pm, BBC2)

With a stunning central performance from Igal Naor, this four-part drama is a compelling account of the rise and fall of Saddam Hussein. It’s chilling yet uttery fascinating, and in tonight’s opening episode we’re in 1979 on the eve of Saddam’s rise to power and a violent culling of those who would stand in his way. Naor makes the would-be dictator a charismatic figure, and that sometimes makes this a difficult watch when you realise your sympathies lie with the baddies.

EastEnders (Thursday 7.30pm, BBC1)

It’s another EastEnders wedding, and if ever there was a doomed union, it’s Sean Slater and Roxy Mitchell. They’re hardly the most stable of individuals, but together they’ll be a disaster. And I guess that’s the fun here - as an audience, we know all this, and that gives a heightened sense of expectation for where things will go in the future. But we still don’t they if they go through with it, and Roxy’s sister, Ronnie, is determined to do everything in her power to stop the nuptials.

Harley Street (Thursday 9pm, ITV1)

Oh joy, more insidiously addictive and ham-fisted drama to revel in. The real virtue of Harley Street *is that it almost makes *Bonekickers look like a competently made adventure thriller. Almost. I have no empathy for any character in this show, which is surely a killer for any popular drama (and I use popular very loosely here)? Even Shaun Parkes as the vaguely engaging Dr Ekkow Obbiang doesn’t quite manage to pull it off, even though he seems to be the only trying to work with some flimsy material. If I walked into this surgery I think I’d choke on the overwhelming sense of smug. Still, at least tonight’s episode has a nice turn from Sally Phillips who effortlessly shows the regulars how to do this acting lark properly.

Celebrity Masterchef (Friday 8.30pm, BBC1)

After last night’s somewhat foul-mouthed (and utterly brilliant) penultimate heat of this year’s contest, it’s all to play for in the toughest kitchen on the box. This really has been a fantastic series, certainly the best of the celebrity variant, and it just whets my appetite for more.

The Kevin Bishop Show (Friday 10.35pm, C4)

While I’m all for new comedy, I’m afraid that the attraction of Kevin Bishop eludes me. Star Stories is bizarrely overrated, and why anybody would think that giving star Bishop his own show (especially after the awful, awful, awful pilot) was a good idea is beyond me. But then, somebody keeps recommissioning Tittybangbang, so in the world of comedy, there’s no accounting for taste.

Comedy Connections (Friday 10.35pm, BBC1)

Comedy Connections has been running long enough for it to be a surprise that the show has never turned its attentions to arguably the finest sitcom of the 1980s. Yes, Minister, and subsequently Yes, Prime Minister, are, even now, sublimely, satirical wonderful, and this is a lovely exercise in nostalgia. Of course, the talking heads are tragically bereft of the much-missed Paul Eddington and Nigel Hawthorne, but those that are still with us speak with affection and awe at their talents. Lovely.

BBC Proms 2008 (Saturday 6.45pm, BBC2)

My word, but it’s a barren wasteland on the box on a Saturday night now. It’s enough to make you watch Big Brother. Or catch up with Bonekickers on the iPlayer. But let’s not be too hasty - there’s always The Proms, which, even if you’re not a fan of classical music, you can always kid yourself that you’re being cultured. The Proms is one of those undertakings that makes you glad we still have a BBC - it’s a fantastic celebration, and this year sees Nigel Kennedy return after an absence of two decades. Enjoy.

The Flipside of Dominic Hyde (Saturday 7pm, BBC4)

A seminal and fondly-remembered entry from the Play for Today strand, starring a fresh-faced Peter Firth as Dominic Hyde, who travels from the future to the 20th century to track down his ancestors. I’m almost embarrassed to be relying on a repeat from a couple of decades ago on a Saturday night, but this holds together really well, thanks to an engaging script and good performances from Firth and Caroline Langrishe.

Comics Brittania (Saturday 10pm, BBC2)

BBC2 really is a lifesaver this evening, with the second part of this charming trip down memory lane that examines some of the great heroes from British comics from the 50s to 70s. Dan Dare, Roy of the Rovers and The Four Marys - yes, they were from Bunty and don’t ask me how I know that - are all here. This is a documentary that transports me back to Saturday afternoons at my gran’s, when Granddad would turn up with the latest comics from the newsagent. Glorious stuff, and with Armando Iannucci’s narration, this has a nicely affectionate tone.

Top Gear (Sunday 8pm, BBC2)

The current series of Top Gear *comes to an end this evening, and sees the boys meet their counterparts from the German equivalent of the show for the ultimate extreme race challenge - *The Bill’s German crossover seems to have started a trend! Fun stuff as always, and with Richard Hammond and James May having agreed new contract terms with Auntie, the boys will be back together for a new series in the Autumn.

Midsomer Murders (Sunday 8pm, ITV1)

Oh yes, this is classic Midsomer Murders, one of those tales that takes an eccentric group of villagers and throws Barnaby and Jones into the middle of things. Tonight it’s the turn of the close-knit Midsomer Magic Circle, who our duo of dour detectives are called in to investigate following the death of a magician’s assistant on stage. It’s all typical fare, and the usual quality guest cast add a sheen of gravitas. This week it’s Ronald Pickup and Brigit Forsythe chewing up the scenery.

Eating with the Enemy (Monday-Friday 4.30pm, BBC2)

Four food critics are presented with dishes cooked by amateur chefs, delivering, as they are wont to do, typically caustic appraisals. It’s a bit like Masterchef, but with everything that makes that show fun (ie John and Gregg) taken out of the equation. The critics panel is made up of Jay Rayner, Charles Campion, Kate Spicer and Toby Young. It’s a bit low rent, to be honest, and I do wish Kate Spicer would smile once in a while - it beats working, after all.

Dragons’ Den (Monday 9pm, BBC2)

Bliss! Some smart scheduling brain has wisely decided to put something decent on the TV over the summer months, and your TV Today correspondent is very grateful. I love Dragons’ Den - it has drama, it has comedy, it has the always-lovely and polite Evan Davis. It also has my favourite Dragon, the ebullient Duncan Bannatyne, who can cut down nervous and hopeful entrepreneurs with a single look of those laser beam eyes. The Dragon’s might be out, but I’m always in for this addictive show.

The Wire (Monday 10pm, FX)

The fifth series of what many high falutin commentators (or your TV savvy mate down the pub) will move mountains to tell you it’s the best television drama of all time. Clearly these deluded individuals have never seen Bonekickers. The Wire is undeniably brilliant, of course, and this fifth season shifts focus yet again to the press and media in Baltimore and how they fit into the landscape between the police and the drug dealers.

Bonekickers (Tuesday 9pm, BBC1)

“Get your coat, you’ve pulled,” growls Gillian Magwilde in fluent cliché as she drags colleague Ben into a newly-discovered burial chamber beneath the Roman Baths in, um… Bath. Ooh, I wonder if they’ll get trapped down there? It’s as silly as ever, and however fond I’m becoming of this crazy drama series, I can’t quite bring myself to forgive its inappropriate excess and bad dialogue. And isn’t it about time a student slapped Dolly with a charge of sexual harassment?

Celebrity Masterchef (Wednesday 8pm, BBC1)

We’re a stone’s throw from Friday’s last hurrah of Celebrity Masterchef, but the three finalists have plenty of challenges to overcome yet. Tonight they cook for a hungry gang of army cadets before heading to some of London’s top restaurants to refine their skills. I adore this silly, addictive slice of culinary entertainment unconditionally, and it never fails to hit the mark.

Burn Up (Wednesday 9pm, BBC2)

A slick stylish eco-thriller with a top cast, Burn Up casts Rupert Penry Jones as Tom McConnell, who takes over the running of major oil company, Arrow Oil, on the sudden retirement of his father in law. And from this point, his life is turned upside down as the lines between friends and enemies blur, with attacks coming from all asides. With a cast that includes Bradley Whitford, for once playing a bad guy, and Marc Warren, this is well acted, well scripted fare, despite the heavy handed ecological message. But hey, we live in difficult times… Concludes on Friday.

The Making of Me (Thursday 9pm, BBC1)

John Barrowman, he gets everywhere, doesn’t he? In The Making of Me, he subjects himself to a battery of tests, ranging from psychological to physical in an attempt to determine whether his sexuality was detfined by his upbringing, or whether he was born gay. The results aren’t exactly conclusive, but nevertheless, this is an interesting approach to a pertinent question, and Barrowman is a genial subject.

Harley Street (Thursday 9pm, ITV1)

I still can’t shake the feeling that with Harley Street somebody is having one big joke at the audience’s expense. I mean, with Bonekickers, I don’t think anybody set out to make it that bad - you’d have to be seriously masochistic for that. But with Harley Street, I think everybody involved knew exactly what they were doing, which is why I can’t just let myself go with it. The high camp was quite charming in the first episode as Paul Nicholls’ Dr Robert Fielding shags his way through an hour of paper thin storylines, but by episode two it’s just plain irritating. Hey ho, at least we’ve got Suranne Jones’s caked on posh accent to jolly things along.

Coronation Street (Friday 7.30/8.30pm, ITV1)

I wish Steve and Michelle would just get over it and move on, allowing Corrie get stuck in to some decent storylines again. Tonight, ‘Chelle is all on for chucking the ring away, which only gives Simon Gregson more chance to do some of that fine gurning he’s perfected over the years. What is it with the soaps? With Steve and Michelle, Corrie had one of its best couples in years, but as always, the writers can’t resist mucking around with a good thing. Just stop it!

Celebrity Masterchef (Friday 8.30pm, BBC1)

It’s all getting very tense in the Celebrity Masterchef kitchen, and tonight, one of our hopefuls will be kicked out of the competition. Will Andi Peters recover from his raw partridge disaster? Can Mark Monaghan sort out his presentation? Will Louis Emerick’s soufflé see him through? And will Liz off of Atomic Kitten just carry on being scrummy and lovely? As always though, will any of it be enough to impress John and Gregg, let alone the three joyless restaurant critics who always manage to annoy me?

Comedy Connections (Friday 10.35pm, BBC1)

A welcome return for this light but always-enjoyable documentary series that looks at some of our greatest TV comedies and the names that made them. Tonight’s labyrinthine journey goes behind the scenes on Till Death Us Do Part, and includes interviews with Una Stubbs, Tony Booth and Alf Garnett himself, Warren Mitchell. Till Death is high on the list of most socially important sit-coms of all time, and this is good stuff from all concerned.

Hadrian (Saturday 8pm, BBC2)

Dan Snow, with typical ebullience, sets off on a journey to find out more about Roman emperor Hadrian and discover if there’s more to him than just a wall near the Scottish border. Thankfully there is, or this would be a very short documentary. Snow’s enthusiasm for his subject is always infectious, making this an enjoyable hour. The film ties in to the British Museum’s forthcoming exhibition, Hadrian: Empire and Conflict.

Casualty (Saturday 8.20pm, BBC1)

With a tedious singing competition on ITV and the revival of a 70s sports show on Five, there’s little choice but to find solace in that perennial Saturday night drama Casualty. It’s never top of my list these days, but that’s not to say the old warhorse doesn’t still have something going for it. But when, oh when, did everybody start sleeping with each other? It’s amazing the patients ever get any care while the staff at Holby A&E are carrying out examinations on each other. Tonight, some extra-marital chicanery has nasty consequences when Jessica and Sean’s son is in an accident while they are both in bed with their lovers. Ouch! Oh, and there might be some medical stuff happening too.

Comics Britannia (Saturday 9.30pm, BBC2)

A terrestrial run for this lovely little documentary series previously shown on BBC4, showcasing the tradition of comics in Great Britain. The first, and best, looks at the rise of the Beano and the Dandy, comics that kept children enthralled in their millions through the likes of Desperate Dan, Little Plum, Lord Snooty, Mini the Minx and, of course, Dennis the Menace. Talking heads contributions are from Steve Bell, Jacqueline Wilson and Michael Rosen, along with some of the creative minds who brought these characters to life.

The Great Escape (Sunday 5.15pm, BBC2)

Somebody is mucking around with the golden rule of television - who in their right mind would think of putting The Great Escape on when it isn’t a bank holiday? Madness! Still, I’m a sucker for this old classic, so bring it on.

George Gently (Sunday 8pm, BBC1)

When a German businessman’s body is dragged out of the harbour, it brings Inspector George Gently and sidekick DS Bacchus running. Foul deeds have been committed and it’s up to our vintage coppers to sort out the mess. This a nice little show, and Martin Shaw has that reliable air about him - the same feeling of familiarity that we get from John Nettles in Midsomer Murders. It makes for comfortable viewing, and there are some twists and turns along the way to keep things ticking over.

Midsomer Murders (Sunday 8pm, ITV1)

You know exactly what you’re going to get with Midsomer Murders, week in, week out, so talking about the actual plot mechanics of an individual episode is largely irrelevant. It’s what keeps us coming back in our millions, so why mess with a tried and tested and formula? In tonight’s sleepy investigation, Barnaby and Jones investigate a murder that could have links to Jones’s past. Gasp!

Dexter (Sunday 10pm, FX)

Business as usual for the mild-mannered serial killer. Tonight’s episode is notable for British audiences as they might just recognise new character Lila - it’s Jaime Murray, formerly of Hustle, who Dexter encounters at Narcotics Anonymous.

Return to… Airport (Monday 7.30pm, BBC2)

Like last week’s retrospective on Vets in Practice, this exercise in nostalgia continues apace throughout the week and revisits the ratings busting mammoth of the fly on the wall genre that was Airport. This fly on the wall series was a huge success at the time, and is arguably responsible for the phenomenon of the reality TV star. Everybody remembers Jeremy Spake, a supervisor working for Aeroflot who launched himself, thanks to Airport, into a reasonably successful TV career. This side effect aside, Airport was inexplicably compelling and this is an enjoyable look back at a slice of TV history.

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

An interesting episode of this hugely enjoyable drama, penned as it is by actor Chris Coghill, best known for his roles in Shameless, amongst others. It guest-stars Dexter Fletcher in a tale that sees the death of an actor being looked into when the thesp’s daughter releases a biography of her father that suggests his death may not have been from natural causes… As always, it’s slightly off the wall with some lovely bits of comedy in amongst the drama.

Liz Smith Night (Monday from 9pm, BBC4)

Oh how joyous, a strand of programming devoted to everybody’s favourite pensioner, indefatigable Liz Smith, better known as The Royle Family’s Nana. The evening kicks off with the last visit to The Royle Family, The Queen of Sheba, in which Smith delivers a heartbreaking final performance as Nana. There are also showings of other Smith turns, including Mike Leigh’s 1973 Play For Today, Hard Labour. The centrepiece of the evening is Mark Lawson Talks to Liz Smith, in which the always charming and self-effacing actress talks in detail about a life that started in near poverty and took her to being a national treasure.

Bonekickers (Tuesday 9pm, BBC1)

My new favourite thing continues in fine, over-cooked form as our team of dialogue-chewing archaeologists uncover human remains in the mud of the Bristol Channel. Could there be links back to Bristol’s place in the slave trade of the 18th century? What a shame they couldn’t uncover a better draft of the script in the mud. It’s all fun in a way it clearly wasn’t meant to be, and it’s almost heartbreaking to watch Julie Graham, a fine, fine actress, wrestle further with the character of Dr Gillian Magwilde, a role she should never have been cast in. Considering it’s from the minds behind Life on Mars and Ashes to Ashes, you desperately hope Gene Hunt is going to arrive and arrest them all.

Jimmy Doherty’s Farming Heroes (Tuesday 9pm, BBC2)

I am getting a little bored of food shows that see a chef of choice setting off around the country to ooh and aah over great food - Rick Stein has been doing it well enough for so many years, do we really need more? Still, as Marco Pierre White galumphs around the country looking for the best of British food, Jimmy Doherty off of Jimmy’s Farm takes a different tack here and turns his attention to farming. And it works - as issues of food wastage and supply become our nation’s preoccupation, this is an eye opening foray into a world that few of us see when we look at the chicken on our plate. And Doherty is a genial guide, being as passionate about produce as supply and the farmers he encounters on his trip.

Private Practice (Tuesday 10pm, Living)

The Grey’s Anatomy spin-off receives its UK premiere on Living, and sees Kate Walsh take the character of Dr Addison Montgomery to a private surgery in Santa Monica. This doesn’t have the bite of Grey’s, but Walsh is a likeable enough actress to make the change in tone work, although the overt leaning towards light, dippy humour could become wearing as the series progresses.

Celebrity Masterchef (Wednesday 8pm, BBC1)

It’s semi-final time for the Celebrity Masterchef hopefuls, and now the pressure is on - as Gregg would have it, this competition JUST, GETS. TOUGHER!!!!!. And with having to cook for 600 beefy construction workers en masse, Gregg, for once, might not be letting hyperbole get the better of him.

The Thirties in Colour (Wednesday 9pm, BBC4)

Fascinating opener of a four part documentary series that examines the changes in photographic techniques that exploded in the 1930s to allow film to be shot in colour for the very first time. This first instalment focuses on the sequences shot by the socialite Rosie Newman, who caught the very young princesses Elizabeth and Margaret playing together in their back garden - Newman was the future King’s next door neighbour at the time!

Harley Street (Thursday 9pm, ITV1)

ITV is still seeking a saviour in the drama stakes, following plucky entries from the likes of He Kills Coppers and The Fixer. Unfortunately for the share price, Harley Street is not going to be it, making The Palace look as if it was written by Marcel Proust. Paul Nicholls is Dr Robert Fielding, a good medic with a big heart, NHS lackey by night, swish Harley Street doc by day. Considering the hours he keeps, it’s amazing Fielding has the time to squeeze in as much sex as he does, let alone the energy - but he does. And that’s the thing with Harley Street, it’s all white coat and no knickers - and as we know from Hotel Babylon, that can work. Harley Street doesn’t because most of the characters are so unlikable that it is rendered bereft of charm. And like Julie Graham in Bonekickers, the usually likeable Suranne Jones is so miscast as Fielding’s plum-in-gob oppo in the Harley Street practice, it hurts. But with torturous dialogue like: “Can we make this quick, I have half an embassy to inoculate this morning.”, Harley Street might just find a place in my affections for some undemanding, slightly laughable fare for a Thursday night.

The Unseen Alistair Cook (Thursday 9pm, BBC4)

An enjoyable profile of the legendary broadcaster whose Letter From America kept us enthralled for decades.

Superstars (Friday 8pm, Five)

Aw, bless Five, they do try don’t they? And I’m glad they do as tonight a TV classic returns in the form of Superstars, resurrected by Auntie Beeb a couple of years back to a lacklustre response. To be honest, I stick around for the theme tune (which is a beauty), but the mechanics of the contest as famous sports personalities compete (this time in teams) is always a bit dull. Still, we’ve got Jim Rosenthal chewing up the scenery on hosting duties, which is always worthwhile.

EastEnders (Friday 7.30pm, BBC1)

It’s all very been tense in EastEnders this week as the Mitchells have all been off on a little jolly so the Enders’ production team can double-bank a couple of episodes. The best thing about this week has been the introduction of Archie Mitchell, as played by the brilliant Larry Lamb. He’s a nasty piece of work, and let’s hope his appearance in this sequence of away day episodes will be extended.

Celebrity Masterchef (Friday 8.30pm, BBC1)

The second quarterfinal and my money is on Wendi Peters. Go Cilla!

Would I Lie to You? (Friday 9pm, BBC1)

A reasonably entertaining panel game in which Angus Deayton chairs two teams, captained by David Mitchell and Lee Mack, who tell each other tall tales with the aim being to guess what’s true and what isn’t. Very similar to Radio 4’s The Unbelievable Truth (which Mitchell chairs), this could be pretty low rent fare, but Mitchell, Mack and Deayton are all pretty sharp in the laugh stakes, and with guests like Rob Brydon, it’s not going to be a dull affair.

Dad’s Army (Saturday 7pm, BBC2)

While every episode of Dad’s Army is always a winner (no, really they are), and always worth recommending, I’m flagging this repeat showing up to highlight Ian Lavender’s comments earlier this week on the state of British television. In Dad’s Army’s 40th anniversary year, he might actually have a point.

Carry on Night (Saturday, from 7.30pm, BBC2)

Looking around the schedules for tonight, this evening of programming to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the Carry On films is a lifeline to avoid the Saturday night tedium. It’s a bit of a cheat though, as there’s nothing here that’s been produced specially, comprising a showing of Carry on Camping (always a pleasure, never a chore) and another outing for BBC4’s Kenneth Williams biopic, Fantabulosa! Best of all is a dusting down of Cor, Blimey!, previously shown on ITV a good few years ago. This is Terry Johnson’s comedy drama that focuses on the relationship between Sid James and Barbara Windsor, and is beautifully done. Geoffrey Hutchings makes a great Sid James, but Samantha Spiro as Babs is just magnificent. Highly recommended.

Foyle’s War (Saturday 9pm, ITV1)

Much as I like Foyle’s War, if a repeat from an earlier series is the best ITV can do on a Saturday night, summer or not, then things really are desperate, aren’t they?

Doctor Who (Sunday 5.35pm, BBC1)

Hang on a minute, weren’t we here last week? If you failed to catch the season finale of Doctor Who, then both The Stolen Earth and Journey’s End are shown here back to back.

George Gently (Sunday 8pm, BBC1)

We previewed this episode in last week’s Square Eyes, but it failed to materialise due to the overrunning of the Wimbledon final on BBC1. It’s good, gentle Sunday night fare with Martin Shaw and Lee Ingleby making a likeable crime-solving partnership.

Midsomer Murders (Sunday 8pm, ITV1)

Upstairs, Downstairs star Simon Williams guests in tonight’s Midsomer Murders as an outspoken magazine owner who might just have got up the noses of a few locals in the village of Midsomer Sonning (just how many of these villages are there?). Of course, it’s not long before bodies are turning up left, right and centre. But is Guy Sandys (Williams) murderer or potential victim? Barnaby and Jones are on the case!

Dexter (Sunday 10pm, FX)

Crime dramas come in all shapes and sizes, and Dexter provides a neat counterpoint to the gentle, sleepy crime outings on our terrestrial channels this evening. It never ceases to amaze me how, week in, week out, the scriptwriters manage to sell this show. And now that Dexter himself has become the hunted, rather than the hunter, things have become even tenser. Yet, despite the subject matter and edgy visuals, there remains something utterly lovable at the heart of the show, and that comes from Michael C Hall’s appealing and charismatic performance in the lead. More please!

Return to… Vets in Practice (Monday 7.30pm, BBC2)

Do you remember the bizarrely popular Vets School *and the subsequent *Vets in Practice? It was a hugely popular fly on the wall series that introduced us to a group of young vets, including Trude Mostue, Steve Leonard and the smitten lovebirds Joe Inglis and Emma Milne. We were suckers in our millions for their adventures in the vet trade, and Trude even forged a fledgling TV career on the back of it. This five-part series revisits them in the here and now. I’m not sure we need it, but ViP was a huge show, so should be of passing interest to some.

New Tricks (Monday 9pm, BBC1)

A very welcome return for one of the Beeb’s most popular dramas. Amanda Redman, Denis Waterman, Alun Armstrong and James Bolan are back as the lovable veteran coppers in a tale that sees Jack (Bolam) face Ricky Hansen, who is standing trial for the old fella’s attempted murder. There are the usual side plots and sweet character moments propping things up in jolly fashion, and I for one am glad to see this hugely enjoyable show back in the schedules.

Roman Mysteries (Tuesday 4.35pm, BBC1)

Thank god the BBC is still investing in quality, well-made children’s drama (just about). Roman Mysteries is a good, solid adventure series, based on the successful novels by Caroline Lawrence about a gang of children erm… investigating mysteries in ancient Rome. Et voila! Roman Mysteries. The first series was really rather jolly and in the first adventure of this second run a group of gladiators arrive in Ostia…

Bonekickers (Tuesday 9pm, BBC1)

While Hugh Bonneville looks vaguely embarrassed by the whole enterprise, and Adrian Lester bravely rallies like a pro in the face of adversity, Julie Graham goes for the full on scenery chewing in this highly implausible load of old cack. Bonekickers is a po-faced adventure drama about a group of archaeologists, led by Graham’s feisty Gillian, that possesses no sense of irony AT ALL. Ridiculous dialogue and improbable situations are thrown around with gay abandon and it’s impossible to take any of this seriously. And the biggest surprise? Bonekickers is from the pen of Matthew Graham and Ashley Pharoah, the genius brains behind Life on Mars. Sorry guys, but we really do expect better from you than this half-baked nonsense.

The Culture Show (Tuesday 10pm, BBC2)

David Simon, creator of cult HBO drama The Wire, pops in for a chat about the success of the show.

Celebrity Masterchef (Wednesday 8pm, BBC1)

Six more celebrities throw their chefs hat in the ring for a chance to be crowned Celebrity Masterchef 2008. Tonight, Denise Lewis, Linda Robson and Mark Monaghan, followed by Michael Buerk, Liz McClarnon and Julia Bradbury are all cooking up a storm. I just hope John and Gregg gird their loins to be a bit more unpleasant to the cooks when they serve up something dreadful. Just one disparaging comment would be okay!

Drama Trails (Wednesday 9pm, ITV3)

This week the labyrinthine connections that link The Jewel in the Crown and Band of Gold are examined in this enjoyable yet slight piece of fluff narrated by James (he’ll never be Doctor Who on my watch) Nesbitt.

A Very Peculiar Practice (Wednesday 9pm, Sky Arts)

A welcome chance to see one of Peter Davison’s finest roles, as he plays idealistic young GP Stephen Daker who pitches up to a new job at a university campus medical centre. This is the finest work to come from the pen of Andrew Davies, and it makes you weep for all those bonnets and corsets. Criminally overlooked.

EastEnders (Thursday 7.30pm, BBC1)

A significant episode of ‘Enders that introduces Gavin and Stacey/Triangle legend Larry Lamb as a major new character who is likely to have far-reaching consequences for at least two characters. Great casting too!

Mock the Week (Thursday 9pm, BBC2)

The always enjoyable, occasionally laugh out loud funny satirical panel show returns under the watchful eye Dara O’Briain. The usual teams are joined by Lucy Porter and Michael McIntyre.

Lab Rats (Thursday 9.30pm, BBC2)

Lab Rats is a genially traditional sitcom from the pen of Chris Addison and Carl Cooper. It’s about the hapless staff of a research lab at a university and is largely inoffensive, but that’s about it. The comedy isn’t razor sharp, but Addison, a graduate of some great Radio 4 comedy and of course, The Thick of It, has a nice line in startled charm, and it could have been a lot worse. And fair play to somebody having a bash at a traditional studio-bound sit-com outside The IT Crowd.

Still Game (Thursday 10pm, BBC2)

Joy! A rerun of the last series of Square Eyes favourite Still Game. Still Game? Still funny!